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Subj:     Bird-Chicken-Supp Jokes
                 (Includes 20 jokes and articles, 26971n,17,cf,wXT2,6)

Dancing Chicken  from
woneye on 11/6/2004
Includes the following:  We Couldn't Get A Sitter Cartoon (S831)
.........................Man And Chicken Go To The Movies (S268, S682)
.........................Dominoes' Techno Chicken - Video (S721)
.........................Gathering Chickens (S745)
.........................Shoe Comic Strip (S832)
.........................Best Pool Shot By A Naked White Chick - Video (S668b)
.........................Rooster Race (S36, S654)
.........................Silkie Chickens - Photo (S902)
.........................Roosters And Bell Ringing (S425b, DU)
.........................Frank And Ernest Cartoon (S807)
.........................The Little Red Hen - Video (S733)
.........................A Guy Mates A Chicken
.........................Rugrats Comic Strip (DU)
.........................Short Chicken Jokes
..............................Uncle Sam Expects You - Poster (S852)
..............................The Other Coast Sunday Comic Strip (S709b)
..............................Get Fuzzy Sunday Comic Strip (S823)
..............................Strange Brew Cartoon (S640c)
..............................Rubes Cartoon (DU)
..............................Chicken And The Road Sign (S857)
..............................Tnree Popsicle Stick Riddles (S812, S816)

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Subj:     We Couldn't Get A Sitter Cartoon (S831)
          From: Dawn Morvan on 11/29/2012
 Source: (Removed from kswebdesigner.com)
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Subj:     Man And Chicken Go To The Movies (S268, S682)
          From: thebartend on 98-07-17 and 3/18/2002
      and From: darrellvip on 2/7/2010

 An old farmer went to town to see a movie.  The ticket girl
 said, "Sir, what is that on your shoulder?"  The old farmer
 said, "That is my pet rooster, Chuckie.  Wherever I go,
 Chuckie goes."

 "I'm sorry, Sir," said the ticket girl, "We can't allow
 animals in the theater. Not even a pet chicken."

 The old farmer went around the corner and stuffed the
 chicken down his pants.  He returned to the booth, bought
 a ticket and entered the theater.  He sat down next to
 two old emergency room nurses named Mildred and Marge.
 The movie started and the chicken began to squirm.  The
 old farmer unzipped his pants so Chuckie could stick his
 head out and watch the movie.

 "Marge," whispered Mildred.

 "What?" said Marge.

 "I think the guy next to me is a pervert."  "What makes
 you think so?" asked Marge.  "He unzipped his pants and
 he has his thing out," whispered Mildred.

 "Well, don't worry about it," said Marge, "At our age
 we've seen them all."

 "Yes," said Mildred, "But this one's eating my popcorn!"

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Subj:     Dominoes' Techno Chicken (S721d)
          From: FunniestStuff.net on 11/5/2010 
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/OvZrhdy2UdY

 This is a fantastic ad spot for the Dominoes' Chicken Pizza.
 Click 'HERE' to see this very funny video.

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Subj:     Gathering Chickens (S745)
          From: ezines@arcamax.com on 3/23/2011

 The farmer's son was returning from the market with the
 crate of chicken's his father had entrusted to him, when
 all of a sudden the box fell and broke open.  Chickens
 scurried off in different directions, but the determined
 boy walked all over the neighborhood scooping up the
 wayward birds and returning them to the repaired crate.
 Hoping he had found them all, the boy reluctantly returned
 home, expecting the worst.

 "Pa, the chickens got loose," the boy confessed sadly,
 "but I managed to find all twelve of them."

 "Well, you did real good, son," the farmer beamed. "You
 left with seven."

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Subj:     Shoe Comic Strip (S832)
          By Chris Cassatt and Gary Brookins on 12/15/2012
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/shoe/2012/12/15
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Subj:     Best Pool Shot By A Naked White Chick (S668b,d)
          From: lubin100 on 10/23/2009 (in Other-Sports)
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/UQAFCbsgQeo

 I love this video.  I laughed and laughed and watched this
 very short video half a dozen times.  Click 'HERE' to see it.

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Subj:     Rooster Race (S36, S654)
          From: morinhome on 1/13/2003
      and From: ginafm on 7/16/2009

 An old farmer decided it was time to get a new rooster
 for his hens.  The current rooster was still doing an
 okay job, but he was getting on in years.  And the farmer
 figured getting a new rooster couldn't hurt anything.  So
 he buys a young cock from the local rooster emporium, and
 turns him loose in the barn yard.

 Well, the old rooster sees the young one strutting around
 and he gets a little worried.  So, they're trying to
 replace me, thinks the old rooster.  I've got to do some-
 thing about this.  He walks up to the new bird and says,
 "So you're the new stud in town?  I bet you really think
 you're hot stuff, don't you?  Well I'm not ready for the
 chopping block yet.  I'll bet I'm still the better bird.
 And to prove it, I challenge you to a race around that
 hen house over there.  We'll run around it ten times and
 whoever finishes first gets to have all the hens for
 himself."

 Well, the young rooster was a proud sort, and he
 definitely thought he was more than a match for the old
 guy.  "You're on," said the young rooster. "And since I
 know I'm so great, I'll even give you a head start of
 half a lap.  I'll still win easy," said the young roster.
 So the two roosters go over to the hen house to start the
 race with all the hens gathering around to watch.

 The race begins and all the hens start cheering the
 roosters on.  After the first lap, the old rooster is
 still maintaining his lead.  After the second lap, the
 old guy's lead has slipped a little but he's still hanging
 in there.  Unfortunately the old rooster's lead continues
 to slip each time around, and by the fifth lap he's just
 barely in front of the young rooster.

 By now the farmer has heard all the commotion.  He runs
 into the house, gets his shotgun, and runs out to the
 barn yard figuring a fox or something is after his
 chickens.  When he gets there, he sees the two roosters
 running around the hen house, with the old rooster still
 slightly in the lead.  He immediately takes his shotgun,
 aims, fires, and blows the young rooster away.

 As he walks away slowly, he says to himself  ........
 "Damn, that's the third gay rooster I've bought this month."

 Moral of this story...Don't mess with the OLD FARTS - age
 and treachery will always overcome youth and skill!

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Subj:     Silkie Chickens (S902)
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 Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/04/25/silkie-chicken_
.........n_5200292.html?1398443404&ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063
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 The Silkie (sometimes alternatively spelled Silky) is a breed
 of chicken named for its atypically fluffy plumage, which is
 said to feel like silk.  The breed has several other unusual
 qualities, such as black skin, flesh, and bones, blue earlobes,
 and five toes on each foot, whereas most chickens only have four.
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Subj:     Roosters And Bell Ringing (S425b, DU)
          From: LABLaughsAdult on 2/24/2005

 John the farmer was in the fertilized egg business. He had
 several hundred young (hens) layers called pullets and eight
 or ten roosters, whose job was to fertilize the eggs.

 The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform
 went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful
 lot of his time so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached
 them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so John
 could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing. Now
 he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report
 simply by listening to the bells.

 The farmer's favorite rooster was old Butch, a very fine
 specimen he was too. But on this particular morning John
 noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all!

 John went to investigate. The other roosters were chasing
 pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters
 coming, would run for cover. BUT, to Farmer John's amazement,
 Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd
 sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.
 John was so proud of Butch, he entered him in the county fair
 ...and Butch became an over night sensation among the judges.

 The result... the judges not only awarded Butch the "No Bell
 Piece Prize" but they also awarded him the "Pullet Surprise"
 as well.

 Clearly Butch was a politician in the making. Who else could
 figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards
 on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace
 and screwing them when they weren't paying attention?

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Subj:     Frank And Ernest Cartoon (S807)
          By Bob Thaves on 6/30/2012
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/frank-and-ernest/2012/06/30
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...Frank and Ernest ponder why the chicken store crossed the road.
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Subj:     The Little Red Hen (S733d)
          From: ToonHeads.Tv
          on 1/30/2010  (in Cartoon-Supp)
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/cJDwq_VLkKQ

 In this classic fable a hen asks help with chores from other
 farm animals.  None of the animals want to help do work but
 they all want to share the fruits of the hen's labor.  Click
 'HERE' to see this old, cute cartoon with a moral.

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Subj:     A Guy Mates A Chicken
          From: thebartend on 98-05-05

 One day this guy strolls into a bar and strolls up to the
 bartender and says to him, "My friend told me that I can
 find some prime entertainment here for pretty cheap.  Would
 you know anything about that?"

 "Sure, " says the bartender, "How much are you willing to
 spend?"

 "I'm kind of broke this week, but I've got twenty dollars,"
 the guy says.

 "I'll tell you what leave your twenty dollars on the bar,
 go down that hall there and take the first door on your
 right," the bartender tells the man with a smile.

 The man leaves his money on the counter and walks down the
 hall and goes into the room.  The room is empty except for
 a bed and a small dresser.  The man takes off his clothes
 and waits on the bed.  After a little while a small panel
 opens up on one side of the room and a chicken runs out
 and starts running around the room.  The guy just sits
 there thinking that this wasn't what he had in mind, but
 that it would have to do.  So the guy jumps up catches the
 chicken and starts to screw it.  When he is done he
 dresses himself and leaves the bar.

 The guy comes back to the bar the next week and goes up
 the bartender again and says, "This week I brought some
 more money, but I want something better if you know what
 I mean.  I'll pay for the best entertainment that you've
 got."

 The bartender tells the guy to leave $80 on the counter
 and to go upstairs down the hall and to take the first
 door on the right.  The man does and when he opens the
 door to the room there is a circle of chairs around a
 bare floor.  All the seats are filled except for one
 seat which the man decides to take.  After a while the
 floor opens up in the center of the circle of chairs
 and there are two lesbians going at down in the room
 below.  The women are rubbing and prodding and caressing
 each other and all the guys in the room get really
 turned on and watch the whole thing until the lesbians
 are done.  Then the floor closes back up and people
 start to get up to leave.  The man says to one of the
 other guys as they are leaving, "Man that was really
 something.  That's what I call entertainment."

 "No", says the guy back, "you should have been here last
 week, some guy was screwing a chicken."

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Subj:     Rugrats Comic Strip (DU)
          by Nickelodeon on 3/11/3009
 Source: http://www.creators.com/today-comics.html
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Subj:     Short Chicken Jokes

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Subj:     Uncle Sam Expects You - Poster (S852d)
..........Taken from the magazine
..........The Poltry Tribute, Mt. Morris, ILL.
..........Volume XXIII, Page 54, Sept. 1917
 Source: BackYardChickens.com

 Click 'HERE' to see this classic WWWI poster.

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Subj:     The Other Coast Comic Strip (S709b)
          by Adrian Raeside on 8/13/2008
          From: redcatt in 2010
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/theothercoast/2008/08/03
 Click 'HERE' to read this cute Sunday comic on the self-
 sufficient life and a chicken's need to cross the road.
 

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Subj:     Get Fuzzy Sunday Comic Strip (S823)
          By Darby Conley on 9/30/2012
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/getfuzzy/2012/09/30
 Click 'HERE' to see the unusual answer Get Fuzzy has to
 the question 'Which came first, the chicken or the egg?'

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Subj:     Strange Brew Cartoon (S640c)
          by John Deering on 4/18/2009
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/strangebrew/2009/04/18
 Click 'HERE' to start to learn why the chicken
 crossed the road.
 
 

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Subj:     Rubes Cartoon (DU)
          by Leigh Rubin on 11/14/2008
Source: http://www.gocomics.com/rubes/2008/11/14
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Subj:     Chicken And The Road Sign (S857d)
          From: Patrick McClintock on Facebook on 6/14/13
 Source: DailyPicksAndFlicks.com
 Click 'HERE' to read this cute sign.

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Subj:     Three Popsicle Stick Riddles (S812, S816, S970)
          From: Unilever
................Englewood Cliffs, NJ 07632
 Source: www.Popsicle.com
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............This last Popsicle stick came from Joel Fallon.
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                           -(o o)-
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........................From Amazing-Animations.com
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