Subj: Bird-Chicken-Supp Jokes
(Includes 20 jokes and articles, 26971n,17,cf,wXT2,6)
Dancing Chicken from
woneye on 11/6/2004
Subj: We Couldn't Get A Sitter Cartoon (S831)
From: Dawn Morvan on 11/29/2012
Source: (Removed from kswebdesigner.com)
Subj: Man And Chicken Go To The Movies (S268, S682)
From: thebartend on 98-07-17 and 3/18/2002
and From: darrellvip on 2/7/2010
An old farmer went to town to
see a movie. The ticket girl
said, "Sir, what is that on your shoulder?" The old farmer
said, "That is my pet rooster, Chuckie. Wherever I go,
"I'm sorry, Sir," said the ticket
girl, "We can't allow
animals in the theater. Not even a pet chicken."
The old farmer went around the
corner and stuffed the
chicken down his pants. He returned to the booth, bought
a ticket and entered the theater. He sat down next to
two old emergency room nurses named Mildred and Marge.
The movie started and the chicken began to squirm. The
old farmer unzipped his pants so Chuckie could stick his
head out and watch the movie.
"Marge," whispered Mildred.
"What?" said Marge.
"I think the guy next to me is
a pervert." "What makes
you think so?" asked Marge. "He unzipped his pants and
he has his thing out," whispered Mildred.
"Well, don't worry about it,"
said Marge, "At our age
we've seen them all."
"Yes," said Mildred, "But this one's eating my popcorn!"
Dominoes' Techno Chicken (S721d)
From: FunniestStuff.net on 11/5/2010
This is a fantastic ad spot for
the Dominoes' Chicken Pizza.
Click 'HERE' to see this very funny video.
Subj: Gathering Chickens (S745)
From: email@example.com on 3/23/2011
The farmer's son was returning
from the market with the
crate of chicken's his father had entrusted to him, when
all of a sudden the box fell and broke open. Chickens
scurried off in different directions, but the determined
boy walked all over the neighborhood scooping up the
wayward birds and returning them to the repaired crate.
Hoping he had found them all, the boy reluctantly returned
home, expecting the worst.
"Pa, the chickens got loose,"
the boy confessed sadly,
"but I managed to find all twelve of them."
"Well, you did real good, son,"
the farmer beamed. "You
left with seven."
Subj: Shoe Comic Strip (S832)
By Chris Cassatt and Gary Brookins on 12/15/2012
Best Pool Shot By A Naked White Chick (S668b,d)
From: lubin100 on 10/23/2009 (in Other-Sports)
I love this video. I laughed
and laughed and watched this
very short video half a dozen times. Click 'HERE' to see it.
Subj: Rooster Race (S36, S654)
From: morinhome on 1/13/2003
and From: ginafm on 7/16/2009
An old farmer decided it was
time to get a new rooster
for his hens. The current rooster was still doing an
okay job, but he was getting on in years. And the farmer
figured getting a new rooster couldn't hurt anything. So
he buys a young cock from the local rooster emporium, and
turns him loose in the barn yard.
Well, the old rooster sees the
young one strutting around
and he gets a little worried. So, they're trying to
replace me, thinks the old rooster. I've got to do some-
thing about this. He walks up to the new bird and says,
"So you're the new stud in town? I bet you really think
you're hot stuff, don't you? Well I'm not ready for the
chopping block yet. I'll bet I'm still the better bird.
And to prove it, I challenge you to a race around that
hen house over there. We'll run around it ten times and
whoever finishes first gets to have all the hens for
Well, the young rooster was a
proud sort, and he
definitely thought he was more than a match for the old
guy. "You're on," said the young rooster. "And since I
know I'm so great, I'll even give you a head start of
half a lap. I'll still win easy," said the young roster.
So the two roosters go over to the hen house to start the
race with all the hens gathering around to watch.
The race begins and all the hens
start cheering the
roosters on. After the first lap, the old rooster is
still maintaining his lead. After the second lap, the
old guy's lead has slipped a little but he's still hanging
in there. Unfortunately the old rooster's lead continues
to slip each time around, and by the fifth lap he's just
barely in front of the young rooster.
By now the farmer has heard all
the commotion. He runs
into the house, gets his shotgun, and runs out to the
barn yard figuring a fox or something is after his
chickens. When he gets there, he sees the two roosters
running around the hen house, with the old rooster still
slightly in the lead. He immediately takes his shotgun,
aims, fires, and blows the young rooster away.
As he walks away slowly, he says
to himself ........
"Damn, that's the third gay rooster I've bought this month."
Moral of this story...Don't mess
with the OLD FARTS - age
and treachery will always overcome youth and skill!
Subj: Silkie Chickens (S902)
The Silkie (sometimes alternatively spelled Silky) is a breed
of chicken named for its atypically fluffy plumage, which is
said to feel like silk. The breed has several other unusual
qualities, such as black skin, flesh, and bones, blue earlobes,
and five toes on each foot, whereas most chickens only have four.
Subj: Roosters And Bell Ringing (S425b, DU)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 2/24/2005
John the farmer was in the fertilized
egg business. He had
several hundred young (hens) layers called pullets and eight
or ten roosters, whose job was to fertilize the eggs.
The farmer kept records and any
rooster that didn't perform
went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful
lot of his time so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached
them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so John
could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing. Now
he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report
simply by listening to the bells.
The farmer's favorite rooster
was old Butch, a very fine
specimen he was too. But on this particular morning John
noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all!
John went to investigate. The
other roosters were chasing
pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters
coming, would run for cover. BUT, to Farmer John's amazement,
Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd
sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.
John was so proud of Butch, he entered him in the county fair
...and Butch became an over night sensation among the judges.
The result... the judges not
only awarded Butch the "No Bell
Piece Prize" but they also awarded him the "Pullet Surprise"
Clearly Butch was a politician
in the making. Who else could
figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards
on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace
and screwing them when they weren't paying attention?
Subj: Frank And Ernest Cartoon (S807)
By Bob Thaves on 6/30/2012
...Frank and Ernest ponder why the chicken store crossed the road.
The Little Red Hen (S733d)
on 1/30/2010 (in Cartoon-Supp)
In this classic fable a hen asks
help with chores from other
farm animals. None of the animals want to help do work but
they all want to share the fruits of the hen's labor. Click
'HERE' to see this old, cute cartoon with a moral.
Subj: A Guy Mates A Chicken
From: thebartend on 98-05-05
One day this guy strolls into
a bar and strolls up to the
bartender and says to him, "My friend told me that I can
find some prime entertainment here for pretty cheap. Would
you know anything about that?"
"Sure, " says the bartender,
"How much are you willing to
"I'm kind of broke this week,
but I've got twenty dollars,"
the guy says.
"I'll tell you what leave your
twenty dollars on the bar,
go down that hall there and take the first door on your
right," the bartender tells the man with a smile.
The man leaves his money on the
counter and walks down the
hall and goes into the room. The room is empty except for
a bed and a small dresser. The man takes off his clothes
and waits on the bed. After a little while a small panel
opens up on one side of the room and a chicken runs out
and starts running around the room. The guy just sits
there thinking that this wasn't what he had in mind, but
that it would have to do. So the guy jumps up catches the
chicken and starts to screw it. When he is done he
dresses himself and leaves the bar.
The guy comes back to the bar
the next week and goes up
the bartender again and says, "This week I brought some
more money, but I want something better if you know what
I mean. I'll pay for the best entertainment that you've
The bartender tells the guy to
leave $80 on the counter
and to go upstairs down the hall and to take the first
door on the right. The man does and when he opens the
door to the room there is a circle of chairs around a
bare floor. All the seats are filled except for one
seat which the man decides to take. After a while the
floor opens up in the center of the circle of chairs
and there are two lesbians going at down in the room
below. The women are rubbing and prodding and caressing
each other and all the guys in the room get really
turned on and watch the whole thing until the lesbians
are done. Then the floor closes back up and people
start to get up to leave. The man says to one of the
other guys as they are leaving, "Man that was really
something. That's what I call entertainment."
"No", says the guy back, "you
should have been here last
week, some guy was screwing a chicken."
Subj: Rugrats Comic Strip (DU)
by Nickelodeon on 3/11/3009
Subj: Short Chicken Jokes
Uncle Sam Expects You - Poster (S852d)
..........Taken from the magazine
..........The Poltry Tribute, Mt. Morris, ILL.
..........Volume XXIII, Page 54, Sept. 1917
Click 'HERE' to see this classic WWWI poster.
The Other Coast Comic Strip (S709b)
by Adrian Raeside on 8/13/2008
From: redcatt in 2010
Get Fuzzy Sunday Comic Strip (S823)
By Darby Conley on 9/30/2012
Strange Brew Cartoon (S640c)
by John Deering on 4/18/2009
Subj: Rubes Cartoon (DU)
by Leigh Rubin on 11/14/2008
Chicken And The Road Sign (S857d)
From: Patrick McClintock on Facebook on 6/14/13
Subj: Three Popsicle Stick Riddles (S812, S816, S970)
................Englewood Cliffs, NJ 07632
............This last Popsicle stick came from Joel Fallon.