.
 
>>>
Subj:     Cow and Sheep Jokes Supplement
                 (Includes 27 jokes and articles, 23 1110,11,cf,wXT2b7a,9)

..........L5 Update


Mad Bull  from
cookpat.geo@yahoo.com
Includes the following:  Drone Video Of Sheep In New Zealand - Video (S997)
.........................Budweiser Streaker Commercial (S972)
.........................Cross-Eyed Cow (S330b, S748)
.........................Money Can't Buy Happiness - Sign (S1036)
.........................Sheep Protest! - Video (S869)
.........................A Cow, An Ant And An Old Fart (S701b)
.........................Extreme Shepherding - Video (S780)
.........................All I Need To Know About Life I Learned From a Cow (S479c)
.........................Reynolds Cartoons (DU)
.........................Methane And Hydrocarbon Production Of Cows (S176, DU)
.........................Jimmy Fallon Milks A Cow - Video (S1083)
.........................Short Cow and Sheep Jokes (S182)
..............................Greener Grass - Photos (S636b)
..............................Even A Sheep Needs A Drink - Photo (S604c)
..............................Whatdaya call
..............................How Sheep Pick Their Nose - Photo (S559c)
..............................Bad Day At The Rodeo - Video (S485b)
..............................A Fly And A Cow Joke
..............................Protect The Sheep - Game (S485)
..............................Titty Bar In Wisconsin - GIF (S554b)
..............................Cow Questions And Answers

============================================================Top
Subj:     Drone Video Of Sheep In New Zealand (S997d-On Site)
          From: Lonnie Winfield on Facebook in 2016
 Source: www.facebook.com/News8/videos/10153893359567552/
.
.......
.
.......Click 'HERE' to see this beautiful video
.
.
Top
Subj:     Budweiser Streaker (S972d-iFrame)
          From: Chris Fallon in 2015
 Source1: www.youtube.com/embed/2LTRB8DmbLw
 Source2: www.facebook.com/jody.m.peter
..........son/videos/10152037995500804/

 Budweiser Streaker was Super Bowl XL's favorite commercial.
 Click 'HERE' to view it.

Top
Subj:     Cross-Eyed Cow (S330b, S748)
          From: LABLaughs.com in 2003

 This farmer has a cross-eyed cow that keeps bumping into
 things. He calls up to vet to try to remedy the problem.

 The vet says. "I think the best thing is to stick a pipe up
 his ass and blow real hard and the cows eyes will straighten
 out. The vet - a 70 year old man - inserts the pipe and
 blows. The cows eyes begin to straighten, but the vet soon
 looses his breath and the cows eyes are crossed again. The
 vet gives it another try, but looses his breath again. The
 vet looks at the farmer - a young healthy man - and says,
 you look like a strong man, why don't you give it a try.

 The farmer agrees. He then takes the pipe out of the cows
 ass, turns it around, and sticks it back in. He then begins
 to blow.

 Holy smokes, says the vet. What in the hell did you do that
 for.

 The farmer replies, "You don't think I am gonna put my mouth
 on the same end of the pipe that you had your on."

Top
Subj:     Money Can't Buy Happiness - Sign (S1036)
          Sign Seller: primitivesbykathy.com
 Source: www.primitivesbykathy.com/images/items/zoom/30369.jpg
.
.......
.
.......Buy this sign from the above source for $31.05.
.
.
Top
Subj:     Sheep Protest! (S869)
          Made by John Owen
..........New Zealand (d-iFrame)
 Source1: www.wimp.com/sheepprotest/
 Source2: www.youtube.com/embed/QcE5aDTszrY
 Source3: www.youtube.com/user/Haywiredigital/videos

 Man talking at a sheep political rally. Video made by
 John Owen from New Zealand.  Click 'HERE' to see this
 hilarious video clip.

Top
Subj:     A Cow, An Ant And An Old Fart (S701b)
          From: darrellvip in 2010
 

..........Moved to Elderly4-Supp
 

Top
Subj:     Extreme Shepherding (S780)
          From: AFine963 in 2011 (d-On Site)
 Source1: www.wimp.com/sheeplight/
 Source2: www.youtube.com/embed/D2FX9rviEhw

 "We took to the hills of Wales armed to the teeth with
 sheep, LEDs and a camera, to create a huge amazing LED
 display. Of sorts"

 Click 'HERE' to see this very cute, and funny 2009 video.

Top
Subj: All I Need To Know About Life I Learned From a Cow
      From: Joke-Of-The-Day-Mail.com in 2006 (S479c)

 * Wake up in a happy mooo-d.

 * Don't cry over spilled milk.

 * When chewing your cud, remember: There's no fat,
   no calories, no cholesterol, and no taste!

 * The grass is green on the other side of the fence.

 * Turn the udder cheek and mooo-ve on. Seize every
   opportunity and milk it for all its worth!

 * It's better to be seen and not herd.

 * Honor thy fodder and thy mother and all your udder relatives.

 * Never take any bull from anybody.

 * Always let them know who's the bossy.

 * Stepping on cowpies brings good luck.

 * Black and white is always an appropriate fashion statement.

 * Don't forget to cow-nt your blessings every day.

Top
Subj:     Reynolds Cartoons (DU)
          Created by Dan Reynolds
 Source: www.mydailycow.files.wordpress.com/
.........2012/05/pinterest_cow_cartoon.jpg
.
.............
.
.
Top
Subj:     Methane And Hydrocarbon Production Of Cows (S176, DU)

 The largest source of methane in the atmosphere is gas
 expelled by bovines (cattle) during excretion.

 A Colorado State University animal nutrition professor named
 Donald Johnson has been studying cow flatulence for 20 years,
 and has determined that the average cow emits 200 to 400
 quarts of methane gas PER DAY, resulting in a total annual
 world cow methane output of 50 million metric TONS!  Don't
 light a match around a cow and never allow a cow inside your
 sleeping bag!!

 The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency has reported that
 burping cows are the number one source of air pollution in
 the United States.  EPA test results show that American cows
 blissfully belch 50 million tons of hydrocarbon into the air
 annually.  However, the EPA estimates that if a way existed
 for controlling the hydrocarbon-rich belches of just 10 cows
 for 1 year, enough gas would be provided to satisfy the space
 heating, water heating, and cooking requirements for an
 average American house.

 A veterinarian has said that since cows produce up to three
 quarts of gas per minute, they NEED to belch.  Otherwise, "If
 it can't burp," the vet said, "its stomach can explode within
 the hour."  He was referring to a story concerning a New
 Zealand farmer who purchased a cow, which he and his family
 were admiring, when suddenly, without warning, the cow "exploded
 before their eyes, spattering into a million bits of flesh and
 bone and drenching them all in blood.

Top
Subj:     Jimmy Fallon Milks A Cow 
          From: Tonight Show w/Jimmy Fallon
..........in 2017 (S1083d-On Site)
 Source: www.youtube.com/embed/Aum817TH--U

 Jimmy has never milked a cow. Blake Shelton takes him to
 a farm to teach him how it's done. Click 'HERE' to watch


Subj:     Short Cow and Sheep Jokes

Top
Subj:     Greener Grass
          From: ginafm
..........in 2009 (S636b)
 Sometimes a picture or two can bring real meaning to our
 grandmother's wisdom. Click 'HERE' for two great pictures.
 

Top
Subj:     Even A Sheep Needs A Drink
          From: ginafm in 2008 (S604c)
Drawing from Flackr.com
 This is a cute, interesting photo that shows how animals
 can adapt to humans.  Click 'HERE' to view it.
 

Top
 Whatdaya call a cow you pick up and toss?
   -- Chuck roast!
 Whatdaya call a cow with two legs?
   -- Lean Beef.
 What does a cow with short legs have?
   -- Dragon Milk
 What do you call a cow up on its two hind legs?
   -- rare beef.
 Whatdaya call a cow with no legs?
   -- Ground Beef.
 Whatdaya call a dog with no legs?
   -- Doesn't matter, he ain't gonna come anyway...
   --  John Braden (S124, S597)
 

Top
Subj:     How Sheep Pick Their Nose
          From: LABLaughsClean
..........in 2007 (S559c)
 Source: (Removed from lablaughs.com)
 You can view this amazing and beautiful picture by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Bad Day At The Rodeo (S485b)
          From: darrell in 2006 (d-iFrame)
..........At: www.youtube.com/embed/o65p2lC5HL4
 View this scary, but funny, video by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
 A farmer is milking his cow. As he is milking, a fly comes
 along and flies into the cows ear.  A little bit later, the
 farmer notices the fly in the milk.  The farmer looks up
 and says, "Hmph. In one ear, out the utter."  -- Mr. Ed
 

Top
Subj:     Protect The Sheep  (S485)
          From: LABLaughsClean
..........in 2006 (in Games2)
 Source: (Removed from donkeycade.com)
 This game is so silly and dumb that it is cute.  Press A, S, D
 and use the mouse to play.  You can play it by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Titty Bar In Wisconsin
          From: CKButch4Femme in 2007
..........(S554b in Nat_States-Supp)
 This animated GIF is very funny.  You can view it by clicking 'HERE'.
 

.
 

Top
Subj:     Cow Questions And Answers

 Q: What happens when I short-legged cow tries
    to jump a fence?
 A: It's an udder disaster.

 Q: What do you call a cow with no front legs?
 A: Lean Beef

 Q: What do you call a cow with no legs?
 A: Ground beef

From: humorlist-digest V2 #4 in 1998
 Q: Why can't men get mad cow disease?
 A: Because they're all pigs.

From: humorlist-digest V2 #115 in 1998
 Q: Why do they put bells on cows?
 A: Because their horns don't work!

 Q: What do you call a sleeping cow?
 A: A bulldozer.

From: humorlist-digest V2 #195 in 1998
 Q: What do you get from a pampered cow?
 A: Spoiled milk.

 Q: What kind of milk makes you blink?
 A: Past eur ized  --  Shannarra

From: coreymac in 2001 (S231b)
 Q: What do you call an Alabama farmer with a sheep
    under each arm?
 A: A pimp.

From: www.huumor.com in 2001 (S237)
 Q: What's the difference between PMS and Mad Cow Disease?
 A: The number of tits!

From: LABLaughsAdult in 2005 (S421b)
 Q: What do you call a cow that had an abortion?
 A: Decaffeinated.

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
========================oOO==(_)==OOo=======================
........................From Animated GIF Finder
.