..........(No ads)
Subj:     Nudist Jokes
                 (Includes 37 jokes and articles, 09899,27,cf,md4w,17)
Streaker from
AGAG Animation Gallery
>>>
Includes the following: Ray Stevens - The Streak - Video (S770)
........................Naked 'Towel Dance' Comedy Act - Video (S899)
........................Naked Balloon Dance - Video (S767)
........................Honey, I'm Home! - Video (S711)
........................Strip Tease - Video (S681, S791)
........................New Nudist At Colony (S206, S349b)
........................Naked News With Michelle Pantoliano - Video (S487b)
........................The Flower Show (S487b)
........................Nude Gymnastics - Video (S608b)
........................Two Boys See Nude Woman (S347, DU)
........................Marbles - Video (S628c)
........................Drivers Kill Farmer's Chickens (S343b, S801)
........................Apartment #6 - Video (S643)
........................Man Swims Nude In Lake (S316b, S583)
........................Photography Lesson #1 - Picture (S419b)
........................Love Dress... (S298)
........................Man Does Striptease - Video (S674b)
........................30 Harsh Things To Say To A Naked Guy (S259)
........................Women Grows Red Tomatoes (S214, S499b)
........................Flight Deck Cartoon (S614b)
........................Taking Son To Nude Beach (S54, S395b)
........................Short Nude Jokes
.............................Playboy Playmate Hunter (S793)
.............................Ursula Martinez: Stripper Magician - Video (S771)
.............................14 Steps To Put On A Bikini (S741)
.............................Best Pool Shot By A Naked White Chick - Video (S668b)
.............................When You See A Woman (S660)
.............................Stripped - Video (S595)
.............................I Just Don't Look Good Naked Anymore! - Video (S576c)
.............................Policeman Breaks Up Women's Party (S328b)
.............................Brazilian Bed Advertisements (S554b)
.............................GoalPoker Penalty Strip - Game (S474)
.............................Three Amazing Photos Of A Woman (S303b)
.............................Flasher Caught (S471c)
.............................Do No Evil (S467)
.............................India Women Plough Fields In Nude (S287)
.............................A Herd Of Sheep (S456)
.............................Guess Who Came Home Early (S436)
.............................Nude Pictures Of The Wife (S413b)
.............................Nudist Billboard (S427b)
.............................Nudist Camp Danger (S521c)

Also see AMAZING file - 'Twenty seven body painting photo's
         BAR1 file    - 'Angry Man Comes Into Bar'
         BIRTHDAY file- 'Wife Takes Husband To Strip Club'
         CARS2 file   - 'Stripping To Speed Up The Car'
         CHURCH-SUPP  - 'Sunday Clothes'
         COMPUTERS-SUP- 'Nude Surfer'
         DRINK_BR-SUPP- 'Bud Light Clothing Drive 2010' - Video
         ELDERLY1-SUPP- 'Couples 50th Anniversary'
         ELDERLY2 file- 'Grandpa Sits Without His Pants'
......................- 'Three Old Ladies Parade Nude'
         ENGLISHMAN   - 'Britains Got Talent Striptease'
         FAT file     - 'Dirty Picture In The Refrigerator'
         FIREMEN file - 'The 2010 Naked Fireman Calendar'
         GAMES file   - 'Nude Craps'
         HALLOWEEN    - 'Snail Costume'
         HALLOWEEN-SUP- 'Halloween Stripper'
         HOOKER2 file - 'Work For Pay'
         JOBS file    - 'Top 10 Reasons To Go To Work Naked'
         LETTERS2 file- 'A Letter To God
         MAILMAM-ETC  - 'Playing "Who Am I"'
         NATIONAL file- 'Root Out Terrorists!'
         OTHER-ANIMALS- 'A Great White'
         PENIS2 file  - 'Nudist Sends Photo To Grandma'
         PLANE2 file  - 'DC-9 Window Frame Crack'
......................- 'Getting A Ticket From A Flasher'
         PRIEST2 file - 'Three Priests Go Skinny Dipping'
         SCHOOL-SUPP2 - 'Daddy Sleeps Naked'
         TIME-SUPP    - 'Nudemen Clock 2.0'
         WOMEN2 file  - 'The Flasher'

============================================================Top
Subj:     Ray Stevens - The Streak (S770d)
          From: Lu Ann Smith Bragg
          on Facebook on 10/17/2011
 Source1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtzoUu7w-YM
 Source2: http://www.raystevens.com/raytv.html?ma_id=2&mc_id=22&p=3&tag=

 This video is off the DVD Ray Stevens - Comedy Video Classics,
 a comedic song about an infamous streaker.  Click on either
 source, or 'HERE' for my copy, to see this cute video.

Top
Subj:     Naked 'Towel Dance' Comedy Act (S899d)
          Performed by Les Beaux Freres
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/erpjlQQEFME

 The 'Towel Dance' by Cirque du Soleil performers Les Beaux
 Freres at the French TV Show 'The Worlds Greatest Cabaret'
 hosted by Patrick Sebastien.  Click on the source, or 'HERE'
 for my copy, to see this excellent, well choreographed act.

Top
Subj:     Naked Balloon Dance (S767d)
          From: kgilmour2000
          on 9/27/2011
 Source1: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGeZgmU3-uE
 Source2: http://videosift.com/video/The-Greatest-
..........Show-On-Legs-The-Naked-Balloon-Dance

 Malcolm Hardee and friends performing balloon dance on
 the first edition of OTT (Over The Top), the late night
 adult spin-off from Tiswas. Originally shown Jan. 2, 1982,
 Central Television's second day of broadcasting.  Click
 on either source, or 'HERE' for my copy, to see this
 cute, funny video.

Top
Subj:     Honey, I'm Home! (S711d)
          From: darrellvip
          on 8/27/2010 (in Headlines-Supp)
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGKe9vRLtvE

 Click on the above source, or 'HERE' for my copy, to
 see this 46 second, funny ad for Norwegian Airlines.

Top
Subj:     Strip Tease (S681d, S791)
          From: ft.apache on 1/28/2010
      and From: tom on 3/4/2012
 Source: http://www.worktobejudged.com/strippause/peca.html

 This interactive video is very funny.  Keep pressing the
 play arrow when ever the censor stops the stripper.  Click
 on the above source, or 'HERE' for my copy, to see the
 funniest video I've seen in years.

Top
Subj:     New Nudist At Colony (S206, S349b)
          From: ipkis on 97-07-13
      and From: Imogenelumen on 10/6/2003

 A man joins a nudist colony, takes off his clothes and starts
 wandering around.  A 6 foot blond walks by him; the man gets
 a hard-on.

 Blond: "Sir, did you call for me?"
 New Man: "No, I just got here."
 Blond: "You must be new here, it's a rule when I give
         you a hard-on, it implies you called for me."

 The blond lays down and lets the man have his way with her.
 The man gets up happy, enters the sauna, sits down, and farts.
 A huge man comes toward him.

 Huge Man: "Sir, did you call for me?"
 New Man: "No, I just got here."
 Huge Man: "You must be new here, it is a rule when you
           fart, it implies you called for me."

 The huge man turns him around and sodomizes him.  The new man
 rushes back to the receptionist...

 New Man: "Here is your card and key back. You can keep the
          $500."

 Receptionist: "But Sir, you only saw 1% of our facilities...."

 New Man: (Rudely interrupting) "Listen lady, I am 45 years
          old, I get a hard-on once a month, but I fart 15
          times a day. No thanks."

Top
Subj:     Naked News With Michelle Pantoliano
          From: darrell94590
          on 5/22/2006 (S487b,d)
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nR_HfOIInb8

 No matter how hard I tried to focus on the news items, it
 didn't work.  I can't focus on the news while a girl strips.
 You can view this video at the above source, or on my web
 site by clicking 'HERE'.

Top
Subj:     The Flower Show (S487b)
          From: darrell94590 on 5/22/2006

 Two little old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside
 the local town hall where a flower show was in progress.

 The thin one leaned over and said, "Life is so darned boring.
 We never have any fun anymore.  For $5.00, I'd take my clothes
 off and streak through that stupid flower show!"

 "You're on!" said the other old lady, holding up a $5.00 bill.

 The first little old lady slowly fumbled her way out of her
 clothes and, completely naked, streaked (as fast as an old lady
 can) through the front door of the flower show.

 Waiting outside, her friend soon heard a huge commotion inside
 the hall, followed by loud applause and shrill whistling.

 The smiling and naked old lady came through the exit door
 surrounded by a cheering crowd.

 "What happened?" asked her waiting friend.

 "I won 1st prize as Best Dried Arrangement!"

Top
Subj:     Nude Gymnastics (S608b,d in Track)
          From: darrellvip on 8/24/2008

 This will definitely raise the interest in this sport.
 Click 'HERE' to view this video.

Top
Subj:     Two Boys See Nude Woman (S347, DU)
          From: LABLaughs.com on 9/18/2003

 One day there were two boys playing by a stream.  One of
 the young boys saw a bush and went over to it and the
 other boy couldn't figure out why his friend was at the
 bush so long.  The other boy went over to the bush and
 looked.  The two boys were looking at a women bathing
 naked in the stream.

 All of a sudden the second boy took off running.  The
 first boy couldn't understand why he ran away so he took
 off after his friend.  Finally he caught up to him and
 asked why he ran away.  The boy said to his friend, "My
 mom told me if I ever saw a naked lady I would turn to
 stone, and I felt something get hard, so I ran."

Top
Subj:     Marbles (S628c,d)
          From: LABLaughsClean on 12/29/2008
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0TitDIwwlY

 Artists paint a nude man holding a bowl of marbles.
 Click on the above source, or 'HERE' for my copy,
 to see this cute, silly comedy sketch.

Top
Subj:     Drivers Kill Farmer's Chickens (S343b, S801)
          From: Imogenelumen on 8/27/2003
      and From: virv on 5/16/2012

 Farmer John lived on a quiet rural highway.  But, as time
 went by, the traffic slowly built up at an alarming rate.
 The traffic was so heavy and so fast that his chickens were
 being run over at a rate of three to six a day.

 So one day Farmer John called the sheriff's office and said,
 "You've got to do something about all of these people driving
 so fast and killing all of my chickens."

 What do you want me to do?" asked the sheriff.
 I don't care, just do something about those crazy drivers!"
 So the next day he had the county workers go out and erected
 a sign that said:

 SLOW SCHOOL CROSSING

 Three days later Farmer John called the sheriff and said,
 "You've got to do something about these drivers.   The 'school
 crossing' sign seems to make them go even faster." So, again,
 the sheriff sends out the county workers and they put up a
 new sign

 SLOW: CHILDREN AT PLAY

 That really sped them up. So Farmer John called and called and
 called every day for three weeks.  Finally, he asked the
 sheriff, "Your signs are doing no good.  Can I put up my own
 sign?"  The sheriff told him, "Sure thing, put up your own
 sign."  He was going to let the Farmer John do just about
 anything in order to get him to stop calling everyday to
 complain.

 The sheriff got no more calls from Farmer John.  Three weeks
 later, curiosity got the best of the sheriff and he decided
 to give Farmer John a call.  "How's the problem with those
 drivers.  Did you put up your sign?"  "Oh, I sure did.  And
 not one chicken has been killed since then.  I've got to go.
 I'm very busy." He hung up the phone.

 The sheriff was really curious now and he thought to himself,
 "I'd better go out there and take a look at that sign...  it
 might be something that WE could use to slow down drivers..."
 So the sheriff drove out to Farmer John's house, and his jaw
 dropped the moment he saw the sign.  It was spray-painted on
 a sheet of wood:

 NUDIST  COLONY

 GO SLOW AND WATCH OUT FOR THE CHICKS

Top
Subj:     Apartment #6 (S643d)
          From: darrellvip on 5/7/2009

 Click 'HERE' to see this cute, nude, strip tease video.

Top
Subj:     Man Swims Nude In Lake (S316b, S583)
          From: LABLaughs.com on 2/14/2003

 The weather was very hot and this man wanted desperately to
 take a dive in a nearby lake.  He didn't bring his swimming
 outfit, but who cared?  He was all alone.  So he undressed
 and got into the water.

 After some delightful minutes of cool swimming, a pair of
 old ladies walked onto the shore in his direction.  He
 panicked, got out of the water and grabbed a bucket lying
 in the sand nearby.  He held the bucket in front of his
 private area and sighed with relief.

 The ladies got nearby and looked at him.  He felt awkward
 and wanted to move. Then one of the ladies said: 'You know,
 I have a special gift, I can read minds.'

 'Impossible', said the embarrassed man, 'You really know
 what I think?'

 'Yes', the lady replied, 'Right now, I bet you think that
 the bucket you're holding has a bottom.'

Top
Subj:     Photography Lesson #1 (S419b)
          From: Buffalo's Jokes
          At: http://www.buffalosjokes.com/12230404.htm
 

Top
Subj:     Love Dress... (S298)
          From: RFSlick on 10/14/2002
          (See 'Three Old Ladies Parade Nude' in ELDERLY2)

 A woman stopped by unannounced at her recently married
 son's house.  She rang the doorbell and walked in.  She
 was shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch,
 totally naked. Soft music was  playing;  the aroma of
 perfume filled the room.

 "What are you doing?" she asked.

 "I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the
 daughter-in-law answered.

 "But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.

 "This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.

 "Love dress? But you're naked!"

 "My husband loves me to wear this dress," she explained.
 "It excites him to no end.  Every time he sees me in this
 dress, he instantly becomes romantic and ravages me for
 hours on end. He can't get enough of me."

 The mother-in-law left.  When she got home, she undressed,
 showered, put on her best perfume, dimmed the lights, put
 on a romantic CD and laid on the couch waiting for her
 husband to arrive.

 Finally, her husband came home.  He walked in and saw her
 laying there so provocatively.

 "What are you doing?" he asked.

 "This is my love dress" she whispered, sensually.

 "Needs ironing," "What's for Dinner?"

Top
Subj:     Man Does Striptease (S674b,d)
          From: darrellvip on 12/5/2009
 Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=orO23tiOrvA

 A man puts on a sexy striptease for his woman.  Click on
 the above source, or 'HERE' for my copy, to see this very
 funny video.

Top
Subj:     30 Harsh Things To Say To A Naked Guy (S259)
          From: gheckman on 1/10/2002

     See '30 Harsh Things A Woman Can Say To A Naked Man' in LIST-SUPP

Top
Subj:     Women Grows Red Tomatoes (S214, S499b)
          From: KMACINTY on 3/9/2001
      and From: darrell94590 on 8/13/2006

 A beautiful woman loved growing tomatoes, but couldn't seem
 to get her tomatoes to turn red.  One day while taking a
 stroll she came upon a gentlemen neighbor who had the most
 beautiful garden full of huge red tomatoes.  The woman
 asked the gentlemen, "What do you do to get your tomatoes
 so red?"  The gentlemen responded, "Well, twice a day I
 stand in front of my tomato garden and expose myself, and
 my tomatoes turn red from blushing so much."

 Well, the woman was so impressed, she decided to try doing
 the same thing to her tomato garden to see if it would work.
 So twice a day for two weeks she exposed herself to her
 garden hoping for the best.

 One day the gentlemen was passing by and asked the woman,
 "By the way, how did you make out?  Did your tomatoes turn
 red?"

 "No" she replied, "but my cucumbers are enormous."

Top
Subj:     Flight Deck Cartoon (S614b)
          by Peter Waldern
          From: Creators.com on 10/16/2008
Source: http://www.creators.com/today-comics.html
 

Top
Subj:     Couple Takes Son To Nude Beach (S54, S395b)
          From: The Bartenders Joke of the Day on 09 Feb 98
      and From: Imogenelumen on 8/21/2004

 Two parents take their son on a vacation and go to a nude
 beach.  The father goes for a walk on the beach and the
 son goes and plays in the water.

 The son comes running up to his mom and says..."Mommy, I
 saw ladies with boobies a lot bigger than yours!"  The mom
 says..."the bigger they are, the dumber they are."  So he
 goes back to play.

 Several minutes later he comes running back and says...
 "Mommy, I saw men with dingers a lot bigger than Daddy's!"
 The mom says..."the bigger they are, the dumber they are."

 The son goes back to play.  Several minutes later he comes
 running back and says..."Mommy, I just saw Daddy talking
 to the dumbest lady I ever saw and the more and more he
 talked, the dumber and dumber he got !"


Subj:     Short Nude Jokes

Top
Subj:     Playboy Playmate Hunter (S793)
          From: darrelldre on 2/27/2012
Drawing from FreeLogoVector.com
 Source: http://playmatehunter.com/playboys-playmate-index#char_75
 This web site is an index to about 966 Playboy Playmates.
 Click on the above source to view these beautiful, nude ladies.
 

Top
Subj:     Ursula Martinez: Stripper Magician (S771d)
          From: darrelldre
          on 10/20/2011
 Source1: http://s99.photobucket.com/albums/l294/lies17/?action=view&
..........current=ursula-martinez-gala-juste-pour-rir.mp4&sort=ascending
 Source2: http://www.4shared.com/video/zdyGDVd3/ursula-martinez-gala-juste-pou.html
 In this video, Ursula Martinez-Gala does a strip-tease magic
 act at Just for laughs festival 2007.  Click on either source,
 or 'HERE' for my copy, to see this silly video.
 

Top
Subj:     14 Steps To Put On A Bikini (S741)
          From: darrellvip
          on 3/22/2011 (in Amazing_Photos6)
 Click 'HERE' to see these fourteen photos showing
 how to put on a bikini.  Photos contain nudity.
 

Top
Subj:     Best Pool Shot By A Naked White Chick
          From: lubin100
          on 10/23/2009 (S668b,d in Other-Sports)
 I love this video.  I laughed and laughed and watched this
 very short video half a dozen times.  Click 'HERE' to see it.
 

Top
Subj:     When You See A Woman (S660) 
          From: rfslick
          on 9/7/2009
 This web page of six nude pictures is very funny.
 Click 'HERE' to see it.
 

Top
Subj:     Stripped (S595d)
          From: tom
          on 6/15/2008
 Only one word comes to my mind when I see this video and
 that word is disturbing.  You can view this very strange
 video on my web site by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     I Just Don't Look Good Naked Anymore!
          From: rfslick
          on 1/24/2008 (S576c.d)
 Source: http://heraldnet.com/article/20071221/MULTIMEDIA/283841756
 Stan Boreson sings 'I just don't look good naked anymore!' in
 this video.  You can view it at the source above, or on my
 web site by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Policeman Breaks Up Women's Party in Israel (S328b)
          From: jerry on 5/5/2003
 A rowdy group of women at a women-only party in Israel
 began to strip and fondle a police officer who had
 came in response to neighbor's complaints about the
 noise believing him to be the stripper they had ordered
 who was to come dressed as a police officer.

 The officer was unsuccessful convincing the women that
 he was the real deal [but how hard did he try?] until
 his partner, the party pooper, arrived.

 Reuters 5-May-03
 

Top
Subj:     Brazilian Bed Advertisements (S554b)
          From: SCOTCOB (in Latin America)
          on 8/24/2007
 You can see these five pictures with nudity on
 my web site by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     GoalPoker Penalty Strip (S474 in Other-Sports)
          From: darrell94590
          on 2/13/2006
 Source: (Removed from the Internet)
 Fun, provocative game, but to get the tart to remove her g-string
 you must play for cash.  You must play the game at the source
 above.
 

Top
Subj:     Three Amazing Photos Of A Woman (S303b)
          From: gheckman on 11/18/2002
 Click 'Here' to see the three photos.  Below the three photos
 it explains why they are amazing
 

Top
Subj:     Flasher Caught (S471c)
          From: LABLaughsAdult
          on 1/20/2006
 Source: http://www.lablaughs.com/adult_toon.php?id=A20040529
 You can view this cute cartoon at the source above, or on my
 web site by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:    Do No Evil (S467)
          From: LABLaughsAdult 
          on 12/26/2005 
 Source: http://www.lablaughs.com/adult_toon.php?id=A19980601
 You can view this cute, nude picture at the source above, or
 on my web site by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     India Women Plough Fields In Nude (S287)
          From: jerry on 7/29/2002
 Tribal women in India ploughed their fields naked to end
 the longest dry spell in Madhya Pradesh history. It is a
 tribal belief that it always rains when women plough the
 fields in the buff.  The rain did fall a few hours later.

 Here in the U.S. we just wash the car (but not in the nude).

 Siffy News (India) 19-Jul-02
 

Top
Subj:     A Herd Of Sheep (S456)
          From: LABLaughsAdult
          on 10/14/2005
 Source: http://www.lablaughs.com/adult_toon.php?id=A20051014
 I wonder how and why people would make this picture.  You
 can see it at the source above, or on my web site by clicking
 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Guess Who Came Home Early (S436)
          From: auntiegah
          on 5/27/2005
 You can view this picture on my web site by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Nude Pictures Of The Wife (S413b)
          From: JokesUncut on 12/28/2004
 A man wearing a dirty raincoat sidled up to a
 businessman on the street corner and asked, "Got any
 pictures of your wife naked?"

 "Certainly not!" huffed the businessman.

 The other man inquired, "Wanna buy some?"
 

Top
Subj:     Nudist Billboard (S427b)
          From: LABLaughsAdult
          on 4/1/2005
 Source: http://www.ezines4all.com/at200501/032.htm
 You can view this cartoon at the source above, or on my
 web site by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Nudist Camp Danger (S521c in Hospital2)
          From: LABLaughsAdult
          on 12/29/2006
 Source: http://www.lablaughs.com/adult_toon.php?id=A19930615
 This x-ray and story can be seen at the source above, or on
 my web site by clicking 'HERE'.
 
 

 Only 14% of Americans say they've done this with the
 opposite sex. What is it?
 Skinny dipping.

 America's first nudist organization was founded in 1929,
 by 3 men.

 In Oxford, Ohio, it's illegal for a woman to strip off her
 clothing while standing in front of a man's picture.

From: dogbyte on 10/27/2001
 Tip of the Day:
 Never fry bacon in the nude!

From: mrx on 5/25/2004 (S383b)
 You know sometimes I get the sudden urge to run around
 naked. But then I just drink some Windex. It keeps me from
 streaking.

From: Joke-Of-The-Day-Mail.com on 9/26/2006 (S505b)
 "Clothes make the man.  Naked people have little or no
     influence on society."  -- Mark Twain

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
========================oOO==(_)==OOo=======================
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..............................From Smiley_Central
.
.