Subj:     Religion1 Jokes
..........(Includes 24 jokes, 17 1131n,15,cL2f,wXT2a8a,6)

..........L5 Update

Uplifter Hands from
Animation Factory
Includes the following:  B.C. Sunday Comic Strip (S622)
.........................President Reagan On The Bible And Prayer - Video (S835)
.........................Bible Study Group (S568c)
.........................The Stethoscope - Video (S765)
.........................Cell Phone Vs. The Bible (S531c)
.........................Zig Zaggy - Political Cartoon (S727)
.........................Having Faith In The Lottery (DU)
.........................Mrs. Brown and The Mormons - Video ((S1085)
.........................Man Wants To Jump Off The Bridge (DU)
.........................II Divo sings "Amazing Grace" - Video/Song (S621c)
.........................Rich Kid Buys A Ferrari (DU)
.........................Pearls Before Swine Comic Strip (S995)
.........................Tyler Perry Speaking At Points of Light - Video (S916)
.........................Religious Man And The Atheist Neighbor (SDU)
.........................And We Pray - Web Page w/Photo (S498c)
.........................Top 15 Biblical Ways To Acquire A Wife (DU)
.........................Mother Goose Cartoon (S605b)
.........................Muslim Demographics - Video (S672)
.........................Religious Shit
.........................Peanuts Comic Strip (DU)
.........................A Prayer For Our Soldiers - Web Page w/5 Photos (S548c)
.........................PMS In The Bible (S187)
.........................Agnes Comic Strip (DU)
.........................Wauism - The Religion For You (DU)
.........................Bizarro Cartoons (DU)

Also see ARAB file    - '15 Schoolgirls Die In Blaze'
         ASCII ART I  - 'Angle'
         ASCII ART III- 'An Angel'
         ASIA file    - 'Buddhist Monk Buys A Hot-Dog'
......................- 'Hindu Women's Red Spot'
         ARTIST file  - 'Painting The Last Supper'
......................- 'Man And His Son Collected Art'
         BAR2 file    - 'Non Sequitur Cartoon'
         BEAR file    - 'The Atheist And The Bear'
         BIRD-PARROT  - 'Parrot Named Moses And The Burglar'
         BLACK2 file  - 'Jesse Jackson Turns White'
         BODY PARTS   - 'Senility Prayer'
         BOXING file  - 'Muhammad Ali On Black And White' - Video
         BREAST file  - 'Husband Buys Bra For Wife'
         BROTHERS file- 'Two Brothers Fight'
         BUMPER STCKRS- 'Christian Bumper Stickers'
         CARS2 file   - 'An Auto Mechanic And His Dog Mace'
         CARS3 file   - 'Woman w/Sick Kid Locks Keys In Car'
         CARS-SUPP    - 'Boy Wants To Drive The Family Car'
         CATHOLIC     - 'Dave Allen On Being Catholic' - Video
......................- 'Mother Teresa's Favorites'
         CHRISTMAS1   - 'Christmas Mistake'
         CHURCH file  - 'How to Get Into Heaven'
......................- 'The Bible According To Kids'
......................- 'Learned From Noah And The Ark'
         CHURCH-SUPP2 - 'Praying For 'Special Needs''
         COLLEGE2     - 'If College Students Wrote The Bible...:'
         COMPUTER4    - 'Computer Prayer'
......................- 'The Computer Prayer II'
         COWBOY file  - 'A Moment Of Prayer By Daniel Adams' - Drawing
         DATING3 file - 'Bringing Home The Fiance'
         DIFFERENCES2 - 'Girl's/Boy's Prayers'
.........DOG2 file    - 'Fundamentalist Couple Buy A Dog'
         DOG-SUPP     - 'GoD And DoG by Wendy J Francisco' - Video
         ELDERLY3     - 'The Senility Prayer And Discoveries'
         FARNER1 file - 'Rabbi, Hindu, And Lawyer At Farm House'
         FOOD_ETC2    - 'Who Should Brew The Coffee?'
         FOOD_ETC-SUP2- 'All Men Should Make Coffee For Their Women' - Photo
......................- 'Shoe Comic Strip'
         GOD1 file    - 'God Quotation'
         GOD2 file    - 'Leave The Bubble Wrap Alone' - Cartoon
         HANDICAPPED  - 'Blind Kid Prays For Sight'
         HEAD/ADS-SUPP- 'Dirt Devil - The Exorcist' - Video
         HEAVEN1 file - 'Three Religious Couples Go To Heaven'
         HELL file    - 'Heaven is Hotter than Hell'
         HUNTING-CMPNG- 'Three Hunters Caught In A Snowstorm'
......................- 'Hunter And Bear Pray'
         JESUS file   - 'Honk If You Love Jesus'
         JEWISH-RABBI - 'Converting a Bear'
......................- 'Sex...Work Or Play?'
......................- 'Priest, Vicar And Rabbi Discuss The Offering'
         JOBS3 file   - 'Office Prayer:'
.........KIDS3 file   - 'Bible Fun'
         MIDDLE_EAST  - 'Iraq In The Bible'
         OTHER-OCCUP  - 'Photographer's Test In Florida'
         PLANE file   - 'Nervous Passenger Carries A Bible'
.........POLIT-BUSH   - 'President Bush Meets Moses'
         PREACHER file- 'Invocation In The Kansas Senate'
......................- 'Elderly Man Looses His Hat'
         PRIEST1 file - 'Bob Hope's Wife And The Priests'
         QUO-COMD-SUP2- 'Mary Maxwell Gives A Funny Invocation Prayer' - Video
         REDNECK-SUPP - 'Uncle And Nephew Say Prayers Before Bed'
         RIDDLE-SUPP  - 'Who Am I Riddle #4'
         SCHOOL3 file - 'New School Prayer'
         SCHOOL-SUPP  - 'Neighbor Follows Tim To School'
         SCIENCE1     - 'Non Sequitur Cartoon'
         SHIPS file   - 'Replica of Noah's Ark'
......................- 'If Noah Built The Ark Today....'
         TAXES file   - 'Man Goes To Priest With Business Problems'
         THANKSGV-SUPP- 'A Thanksgiving Prayer'
         THOUGHTS-KIDS- 'Ice Cream-Good For The Soul'
         THOUGHTS-LRN2- 'Deep Thoughts'
         THO-TIME-SUPP- 'Thousands Expect Apocalypse in 2012'

Subj:     B.C. Sunday Comic Strip (S622) 
          by Johnny Hart in 2008
 Source: www.gocomics.com/bc/2008/12/07
Subj:     President Reagan On The Bible And Prayer
          From: tom in 2013 (S835d-iFrame)
 Source: www.youtube.com/embed/OvN1jTkzXbY?rel=0

 Ronald Reagan's church put this video together to commemorate
 the birthday of Ronald Reagan.  Click 'HERE' to learn about
 Reagan's faith in Christ.

Subj:     Bible Study Group (S568c)
          From: Ossama's Laugh in 1998

 (See "Man Given Six Months To Live" in Doctor-Supp)

 A Bible study group was discussing the unforeseen
 possibility of their sudden death.  The leader of the
 discussion said, " We will all die some day, and none
 of us really know when, but if we did we would all do
 a better job of preparing ourselves for that inevitable

 "Everybody shook their heads in agreement with this

 Then the leader said to the group, "What would you do if
 you knew you only had 4 weeks of life remaining before
 your death, and then the Great Judgment Day?"

 A gentleman said, " I would go out into my community and
 minister the Gospel to those that have not yet accepted
 the Lord into their lives."

 "Very good!", said the group leader, and all the group
 members agreed, that would be a very good thing to do.

 One lady spoke up and said enthusiastically, "I would
 dedicate all of my remaining time to serving God, my
 family, my church, and my fellow man with a greater

 "That's wonderful!" the group leader commented, and all
 the group members agreed, that would be a very good thing
 to do.

 One gentleman in the back finally spoke up loudly and
 said, "I would go to my mother-in-laws house for the
 4 weeks."

 Everyone was puzzled by this answer, and the group leader
 ask, "Why you mother-in-laws home?"

 The gentleman smiled sarcastically and replied, "Because,
 that would be the longest 4 weeks of my life!"

Subj:     The Stethoscope (S765)
          From: hilary.miller05
..........in 2011 (d-iFrame)
 Source1: www.youtube.com/embed/bYI_aOyCn9Y
 Source2: www.angelfire.com/ak2/intelligencerreport/stethoscope.html

 A man finds a stethoscope with unusual powers.  He discovers
 what soundtrack is playing inside him.  Produced by the
 Southern Hills Church of Christ in Abilene, TX.  Click
 'HERE' to see this very well done Christian video.

Subj:     Cell Phone Vs. The Bible (S531c)
          From: RDOBRY in 2007

 I wonder what would happen, if we treated our Bible, like
 we treat our cell phone?
 * What if we carried it around in our purses or pockets?
 * What if we flipped through it several time a day?
 * What if we turned back to go get it, if we forgot it?
 * What if we used it to receive messages from the text?
 * What if we treated it like we couldn't live without it?
 * What if we gave it to kids as gifts?
 * What if we used it when we traveled?
 * What if we used it in case of emergency?

 This is something to make you go "hmmm...where is my Bible?"

 Oh, and one more thing.  Unlike our cell phone, we don't
 have to worry about our Bible being disconnected...because
 Jesus already paid the bill!

 Makes you stop and think "where are my priorities?"
 And, NO dropped calls!

Subj:     Zig Zaggy (S727)
          By Ward Sutton, From: Tea Party Comics
          in Funny Times on November 2010
 Source: www.boston.com/bostonglobe/editorial

 The newspaper comics page: some find it to be innocuous,
 even at times irrelevant.  But there's a growing concern
 among a certain segment of the country that the comics
 page is out of step with mainstream values, if not an
 outright cesspool of treasonous, pinko propaganda.  So
 in the interest of fairness and balance we present comics
 reinvented by Tea Party cartoonists Joe Smith and Ward
Subj:     Having Faith In The Lottery (DU)
          From: kate289 in 1999

 Every year at the state fair Paul entered the lottery for the
 brand-new truck  and lost.  This year, he told his friend David,
 he wasn't going to bother and enter.

 "What kind of attitude is that?"  David asked.  He leaned closer
 and whispered, "What you need, pal, is FAITH.  Look around and see
 if the good Lord sends you a message."

 Strolling around the fair, Paul grew more and more despondent as
 the drawing  neared.  Nothing struck him, no divine inspiration,
 no sign from God.  Finally, while he was passing old Mrs. Kelleher's
 pie stand, he glanced over and saw the woman bending down.  She
 wasn't wearing any panties, and suddenly her ass began to glow.
 Suddenly a finger of flame came from the skies and - without
 her even knowing it - used her ass as a tablet.  The fiery finger
 etched a seven on each cheek.

 Thanking God, Paul rushed to the raffle booth and played the number
 77.  A few minutes later, the drawing was held.  And once again,
 Paul lost: the winning number was 707.

Subj:     Mrs. Brown and The Mormons
..........From: Cathy Lavezzo-Freitas
..........in 2017 (S1085d-On Site)
 Source: www.youtube.com/embed/mrlfvqfjQmk
 Click 'HERE' to see the skit 'Mrs. Brown and The Mormons'
 on the BBC One show Mrs Brown's Boys.
Subj:     Man Wants To Jump Off The Bridge (DU)
          From: Ossama's Laugh in 1998

 I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man
    standing on the edge, about to jump off.  So I ran
    over and said "Stop! Don't do it!"

 He said "Why shouldn't I?".
 I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!"

 He said, "Like what?"
 I said, "Well, are you religious or atheist?"

 He said, "Religious."
 I said, "Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?"

 He said, "Christian."
 I said, "Me too! Are you catholic or Protestant?"

 He said, "Protestant."
 I said, "Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"

 He said, "Baptist!"
 I said, "Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist church of god
    or Baptist church of the lord?"

 He said, "Baptist church of god!"
 I said, "Me too! Are you original Baptist church of god,
    or are you reformed Baptist church of god?"

 He said, "Reformed Baptist church of god!"
 I said, "Me too! Are you reformed Baptist church of god,
    reformation of 1879, or reformed Baptist church of god,
    reformation of 1915?"

 He said, "Reformed Baptist church of god, reformation
    of 1915!"
 I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off

Subj:     II Divo sings "Amazing Grace"
          From: tom in 2008
 Source www.youtube.com/embed/GYMLMj-SibU

 II Divo puts a fresh face on popular songs, utilizing their
 exceptional voices, good looks, and cultural diversity to
 bring their romantic blend of classical and pop music to
 audiences around the world.  Formed after a two-year search,
 the quartet is comprised of American tenor David Miller,
 popular French singer Sebastien Izambard, Swiss tenor Urs
 Buhler, and Spanish baritone Carlos Marin.  Their eponymous
 debut album was released in April of 2005 and featured a
 diverse play list that included a cover of the Toni Braxton
 hit "Unbreak My Heart" and the Frank Sinatra standard "My Way."
 It became a massive worldwide hit.  Amazing Grace demonstrates
 their great singing ability.

 You can hear II Divo sing Amazing Grace by clicking 'HERE'.

 II Divo's description from StarPulse.com.

Subj:     Rich Kid Buys A Ferrari (DU)
          From: Ossama's Laugh in 1998

 The classic spoiled rich kid (prodigal son) at 17 tells
 his Dad he's leaving, he never wants to communicate with
 them again, and could he please have his inheritance now.
 Reluctantly, the father complies.

 The son immediately goes out and buys a Ferrari F-40.

 Perhaps feeling a little bad karma coming on, the son decides
 to swing by he church and have his family's Baptist preacher
 bless the car before departing.

 He explains to the preacher his request, and the preacher
 looks a little puzzled and asks "You say its an Italian what?
 What's a turbocharger?"

 Annoyed, the son zooms away and pulls into a Catholic church,
 hoping the priest might say a blessing or sprinkle a little
 holy water on the radiator. Puzzled, the priest says "What
 is a Ferrari my son?"

 Annoyed again, the son zooms over to the Unitarian church.
 The minister comes out and greets the son, and says "Fucking
 Awesome! Ferrari F-40, with digital fuel injection, 12
 cylinder quad turbocharged motor and a Getrag 6 speed
 gearbox.  What's a blessing?

Subj:     Pearls Before Swine (S995)
          By Stephan Pastis in 2016
 Source: www.gocomics.com/pearlsbeforeswine/2016/02/06
Subj:     Tyler Perry Speaking At Points of Light
          Posted by Points of Light
          From: Tyler Perry (S916d-iFrame)
 Source1: www.youtube.com/embed/rIblCMm1PQ8
 Source2: www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10152784509868268

 Entertainer Tyler Perry addressed Points of Light's Conference
 on Volunteering and Service, June 16-18 2014 in Atlanta.  Click
 'HERE' to listen to Tyler's talk about his childhood.

Subj:     Religious Man And The Atheist Neighbor (DU)
          From: Bawdy.Net Collage #258 in 1998

 A very religious man lived right next door to an atheist.
 While the religious one prayed day in, day out, and was
 constantly on his knees in communion with his Lord, the
 atheist never even looked twice at a church.

 However, the atheist's life was good, he had a well-paying
 job and a beautiful wife, and his children were healthy and
 good-natured, whereas the pious man's job was strenuous and
 his wages were low, his wife was getting fatter every day
 and his kids wouldn't give him the time of the day.

 So one day, deep in prayer as usual, he raised his eyes
 towards heaven and asked:

 "Oh God, I honour you every day, I ask your advice for
 every problem and confess to you my every sin.  Yet my
 neighbour, who doesn't even believe in you and certainly
 never prays, seems blessed with every happiness, while I
 go poor and suffer many an indignity. Why is this?"

 And a great voice was heard from above:


Subj:     And We Pray
          From: LABLaughsClean
..........in 2006 (S498c)
 Source: (Removed from lablaughs.com)

 This very cute picture by clicking 'HERE'.  A Dennis
 the Menace comic strip has also been included.

Subj:     Top 15 Biblical Ways To Acquire A Wife (DU)
          From: Ossama's Laugh in 1998

  1. Find an attractive prisoner of war, bring her home,
     shave her head, trim her nails, and give her new
     clothes.  She's yours.  --(Deuteronomy 21:11-13)

  2. Find a prostitute and marry her. - (Hosea 1:1-3)

  3. Find a man with seven daughters, and impress him by
     watering his flock.  -- Moses (Exodus 2:16-21)

  4. Purchase a piece of property, and get a woman as part
     of the deal.  -- Boaz (Ruth 4:5-10)

  5. Go to a party and hide. When the women come out to
     dance, grab one and carry her off to be your wife.
       -- Benjaminites (Judges 21:19-25)

  6. Have God create a wife for you while you sleep. Note:
     this will cost you.  -- Adam (Genesis 2:19-24)

  7. Agree to work seven years in exchange for a woman's
     hand in marriage.  Get tricked into marrying the
     wrong woman.  Then work another seven years for the
     woman you wanted to marry in the first place.  That's
     right, fourteen years of toil for a wife.
      -- Jacob (Genesis 29:15-30)

  8. Cut 200 foreskins off of your future father-in-law's
     enemies and get his daughter for a wife.
       -- David (I Samuel 18:27)

  9. Even if no one is out there, just wander around a bit?
     you'll definitely find someone. (It's all relative, of
     course.)  -- Cain (Genesis 4:16-17)

 10. Become the emperor of a huge nation and hold a beauty
     contest.  -- Xerxes or Ahasuerus (Esther 2:3-4)

 11. When you see someone you like, go home and tell your
     parents, "I have seen a ... woman; now get her for me."
     If your parents question your decision,  simply say,
     "Get her for me. She's the one for me."
       -- Samson (Judges 14:1-3)

 12. Kill any husband and take HIS wife (Prepare to lose
     four sons, though).  -- David (2 Samuel 11)

 13. Wait for your brother to die. Take his widow. (It's
     not just a good idea; it's the law.)  -- Onana and Boaz
     (Deuteronomy or Leviticus, example in Ruth)

 14. Don't be so picky. Make up for quality with quantity.
       -- Solomon (1 Kings 11:1-3)

 15. A wife?...NOT!  -- Paul (1 Corinthians 7:32-35)

Subj:     Mother Goose Cartoon (S605b)
          By Mike Peters in 2008
.Source: www.grimmy.com/comics.php
Subj:     Muslim Demographics
          From: tom in 2009
..........(S672d-iFrame in Nat-Supp)
 Source1: www.youtube.com/embed/6-3X5hIFXYU
 Source2: www.snopes.com/politics/religion/demographics.asp

 Click 'HERE' to see this video on Muslim population growth
 around the world.

 Snopes.com at Source2 has declared that the video is
 "Mostly False" because of such things as the following:
It's true that in recent years population growth
in EU countries has been primarily driven by
immigration, which, for example, accounted for
almost 85% of the population growth in EU countries
in 2005.  However, that statistic includes all
immigrants to EU countries, not just Muslims.
 To me the video shows "Toto, I've a feeling we're not
 in Kansas any more.."

Subj:     Religious Shit

 (Also see 'Religious View Of Shit' in SHIT)

      Hare Krishna: Shit happens, rama rama ding dong
          Hinduism: Shit happened before
             Islam: If shit happens, take a hostage
               Zen: What is the sound of shit happening?
          Buddhism: When shit happens, is it really shit?
      Confucianism: Confucius say, "shit happens"
 7th day adventist: Shit happens on Saturday
      Protestanism: Shit won't happen if I work harder
       Catholicism: If shit happens, I deserve it
  Jehova's witness: Knock, knock, shit happens
         Unitarian: What is this shit?
            Mormon: Shit happens, again and again and again
           Judaism: Why do this shit happen to me?

Subj:     Peanuts Comic Strip (DU)
          By Charles M. Schulz in 2018
 Source: www.gocomics.com/peanuts/2018/07/06
Subj:     A Prayer For Our Soldiers
          From: LABLaughsClean
..........in 2007 (S548c, in Sold-Supp)
.Sources: (Removed from lablaughs.com)

 This web page is a prayer and five photos of our troops.
 View them by clicking 'HERE'.

Subj:     PMS In The Bible (S187)
          From: gheckman in 2000

 During his sermon on Sunday, the local preacher told his
 congregation that the entire range of human existence
 could be found in the Bible.  If anything can happen to
 humans, it is described somewhere in the Bible.

 After the service, a woman came up to the preacher and said,
 "Reverend, I don't think the Bible mentions anything about
 PMS anywhere."

 The preacher told the woman he was certain he could find
 a reference to PMS somewhere in the Bible.  During the
 following week, he searched diligently, book-by-book,
 chapter-by-chapter, and verse-by-verse.  On the following
 Sunday, the woman came up to him and asked, "Did you find
 PMS mentioned in the Bible?"

 The preacher smiled, opened his Bible, and began to read:
 "......and Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Bethlehem."

Subj:     Agnes Comic Strip (DU)
          by Tony Cochran in 2009
 Source: www.gocomics.com/agnes/2009/03/07
Subj:     Wauism - The Religion For You (DU)
          From: Ossama's Laugh in 1998

 Dear Friendly Friend:

 How many times have you wanted to fill that yawning
 spiritual void in your life but just weren't able to
 find the time or the energy? How often have you wanted
 to form a more personal relationship with a Higher
 Authority but just couldn't get turned on by that same
 old tired selection of Supreme Beings?  Haven't you ever
 wished there was just one religion out there that
 understood you, Friendly Friend, that indulged you, one
 that fit in with your creative, dynamic lifestyle?  Well,
 at last, thanks to the Creators of Wauism, there is.
 Finally, there's a faith that works for you, Friendly
 Friend, instead of the other way around.  After all these
 years, and following an in-depth market research study,
 Wauists Worldwide (A full-service non-profit agency not
 affiliated with CBS International) has come up with a
 religion that draws upon the best features of some of the
 world's most popular denominations, but goes them all far

 Yes, Friend, that's right! Wauism is everything some
 religions are and much, much more.  It's not just a job,
 it's an adventure; it's a breath mint, and a candy mint;
 it's everything you always wanted in a God and less.
 Designed using the latest in CAR (Computer-Aided Religion)
 technology, here's just a few of the features Wauism

 1. Guaranteed Salvation. Guaranteed. Other religions
    require you to behave a certain way in the here-and-now
    in order to make out in the hereafter; with Wauism, you
    can do whatever you want, because your salvation is
    guaranteed!  Wauism realizes you've got enough to worry
    about in life without having to be nervous about where
    you're headed after you die, so relax!  As a Wauist,
    death means never having to have said you're sorry.
    Whatever Heaven you want is yours; or if you'd rather
    just be dead, that's fine, too.

 2. Your Choice of Supreme Being. No more arguing about
    who's more all-powerful, Jesus or Mohammed, Buddha or
    Joseph Smith.  Stop fighting about whether Allah could
    take  The Holy Ghost in a wrestling match. End the
    endless bickering over whether the Supreme Deity is a
    He or a She.  With Wauism, you can choose.  Using the
    patented Godolyzer, you make God in your image.  Combine
    Jesuss' hairdo with Mother Nature's eyes.  Add the musical
    flair of Krishna to the sexual swagger of Zoroaster.  You
    want a Lord who's vengeful but also knows how to rock?
    No problem.  Using the Godolyzer, with or without the
    templates provided, you make the call.

 3. Eat Whatever You Want. Remember fish sticks on Friday?
    Or how about unleavened bread? And who--try as they
    might--can forget "bitter herbs?"  Well, now, thanks to
    Wauism, you can. As a Wauist, you'll never have to
    tongue another Eucharist wafer off of your palate or
    nurse another hangover brought on from sacramental wine
    again.  Glut your maw however you'd like, whenever you'd
    like. Eat all you want, just want all you take.

 4. More Efficient Commandments. Some religions take as many
    as Ten Commandments to lay down their laws. Wauism, using
    the latest in data-compression techniques, has significantly
    reduced the number of Commandments and has also managed to
    dramatically decrease their stringency. Think of them
    simply as a Couple of Suggestions, and if you'd rather
    not, hey, Friend, that's quite all right, too.

 5. No Sexual Taboos. Has anything turned more people away
    from the power above the heavens than the power below
    their waists?  Wauism doesn't have the problem, because
    as a Wauist, you Friendly Friend, can stick or get
    stuck however you want with whom or whatever you want
    whenever or wherever you want.  As long as no one gets
    hurt--or just if they want to--Wauism says have fun.
    And be safe.

 6. More and Better Holidays. Even the most fun-loving
    religions usually have only half a dozen or so major
    holidays a year. And often several of these are days
    of atonement or fasting.  Wauism, on the other hand,
    features a full complement of 365 full-scale religious
    holidays a year!  366 for leap year.  And all include
    presents and feasting.

 7. No Hazing Rituals. No hitting with sticks.  No
    drenchings in water.  No knives aimed at your privates.
    Need we say more?

 8. No Annual Fee. Because of low overhead (no Gothic
    cathedrals to keep up, no sacred texts to maintain, no
    Crusades to mount) Wauism is offered to you entirely
    free! A letter now and again would be nice, but hey,
    don't sweat it.

 9. 100% Compatibility. Wauism does not require you to
    change or upgrade any of your existing religious or
    sectarian beliefs. It is in no way mutually exclusive.
    You can be a Wauist and anything else you want, too--
    even Republican.

10. Quit at Any Time. No forms to fill out, no messy dyes
    to spill, no one will call you.  You can be a Wauist
    one day and something else the next.  Change hourly if
    you'd like.  By the second if you'd prefer.  Or, be a
    Wauist forever. It's entirely up to you.  So, there you
    have it, Friend, in a nutshell--a pistachio to be exact.
    With Wauism, you get all the plusses of other religions
    with none of the minuses. It's like having your cake and
    eating it, too.  Heck, it's like owning the whole bakery!
    And because you, Friendly Friend, are who you are, and
    only sometimes somebody else, you have been selected to
    participate in this charter membership offer.  As a Wauist,
    you'll enjoy the benefits of the world's only computer-
    designed faith as well as the peace of mind of knowing if
    the Armageddon does come, it's not your fault!

 So, join today and start receiving the benefits immediately.
 All you have to do is whatever you want.  Make no phone
 calls unless you feel so inclined.  Write no letters unless
 it strikes your fancy. Send no money, unless you want to.

 Be a Wauist or don't be.  You are still surrounded in a
 cone of love.


 D.A. LeTang Wauist
Subj:     Bizarro Cartoons (DU)
          By Dan Piraro in 2017
 Source: www.bizarro.com/comics/january-5-2017/
                           -(o o)-
..........................From Wonderin Bout Genealogy II