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Subj:     Football-Supp Jokes (Gz)
                 (Includes 20 jokes and articles)

Football Helmets from
Animated Cliparts
Includes the following:  Oakland Raider Alert (S505)
.........................The Chaplain For Notre Dame (S495c)
.........................Short Football Jokes
..............................Frank And Ernest (S606b)
..............................NFL Quarterbacks' Names (S593)
..............................Maxine On The Super Bowl (S573c)
..............................Georgia Mascot Missing (S554c)
..............................Michael Vick Trial (S553b)
..............................Eight Raider Question-Answers (S523b)
============================================================Top
Subj:     Oakland Raider Alert (S505)
          From: jbcary1 on 9/25/2006

 Oakland Raiders football practice was delayed nearly two hours
 today after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery
 substance on the practice field.

 Head coach Art Shell immediately suspended practice and called
 the police and federal investigators.

 After a complete analysis, FBI forensic experts determined that
 the white substance unknown to players was the "GOAL LINE."

 Practice resumed after special agents decided the team was
 unlikely to encounter the substance again.

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
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Subj:     The Chaplain For Notre Dame (S495c)
          From: LABLaughsAdult on 7/17/2006

 Years ago, the chaplain of the football team at Notre Dame
 was a beloved old Irish priest.  At confession one day, a
 football player told the priest that he had acted in an un-
 sportsman-like manner at a recent football game.  "I lost
 my temper and said some bad words to one of my opponents."

 "Ahhh, that's a terrible thing for a Notre Dame lad to be
 doin'," the priest said. He took a piece of chalk and drew
 a mark across the sleeve of his coat.

 "That's not all, Father. I got mad and punched one of my
 opponents."

 "Saints preserve us!" the priest said, making another chalk
 mark.

 "There's more. As I got out of a pileup, I kicked two of the
 other team's players in a sensitive area."

 "Oh, goodness me!" the priest wailed, making two more chalk
 marks on his sleeve. "Who in the world were we playin' when
 you did these awful things?"

 "Southern Methodist."

 "Ah, well," said the priest, wiping his sleeve, "boys will
 be boys."

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
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Subj:     Short Football Jokes

Top
Subj:     Frank And Ernest (S606b)
          by Bob Thaves
          From: WashingtonPost.com on 8/16/2008
 Source: http://members.comics.com/members/common
........./affiliateArchive.do?site=washpost&comic=franknernest
 You can view this cute comic strip about football practice
 by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     NFL Quarterbacks' Names (S593)
          From: darrellvip
          on 5/31/2008
 You can view these four photos on why NFL quarterbacks
 need to keep their names short by clicking 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Maxine On The Super Bowl (S573c)
          From: darrellvip
          on 1/14/2008
 To see the cartoon on Maxine's opinion of the Super Bowl,
 click 'HERE'.
 

Top
Subj:     Georgia Mascot Missing (S554c)
          From: AFine963 on 8/29/2007
Drawing from Table and Home
 You can see the last photo taken of the Georgia Mascot
 before his unexplained disappearance on my web site by
 clicking 'HERE'.  If you know anything about this case,
 please contact the proper authorities.
 

Top
Subj:     Michael Vick Trial (S553b)
          From: CKButch4Femme
          on 8/22/2007
  Source: http://good-times.webshots.com
........../photo/2206584760047371020fSNnyd?vhost=good-times
 You can see this cute cartoon of the Michael Vick trial
 at the source above, or on my web site by clicking 'HERE'.
 The second Vick photo is from AFine963 on 8/24/2007.

From: LABLaughsClean on 9/12/2007 (S556b)
 "The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is
  likely to be the one who dropped it."  -- Lou Holtz

 "Motivation is simple. You eliminate those who are not
  motivated."  -- Lou Holtz / Arkansas

 "It isn't necessary to see a good tackle.  You can
  hear it."  -- Knute Rockne / Notre Dame

 "I've found that prayers work best when you have big
  players."  -- Knute Rockne / Notre Dame
 

Top
Subj:     Eight Raider Question-Answers (S523b)
          From: darrell94590 on 1/22/2007

 Q: What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching
    the Super Bowl?
 A: The Oakland Raiders.

 Q: What do the Oakland Raiders and
    Billy Graham have in common?
 A: They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".

 Q: How do you keep a Oakland Raider out of your yard?
 A: Put up goal posts.

 Q: Where do you go in Oakland in case of a tornado?
 A: To The Oakland Coliseum - they never get a touchdown there.

 Q: What do you call a Oakland Raider with a Super Bowl ring?
 A: A thief!!

 Q: What's the difference between the Oakland Raiders
    and a dollar bill?
 A: You can still get 4 quarters out of a dollar bill.

 Q: How many Oakland Raiders does it take to win a Super Bowl?
 A: Nobody knows and we will never find out.

 Q: What do the Oakland Raiders and possums have in common?
 A: Both play dead at home (and get killed on the road).

                            \\\//
                           -(o o)-
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Smiley snowman from
darrell94590 on 7/11/2006
.