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Subj:     Hunting And Camping Supp Jokes
                 (Includes 29 jokes and articles, 22 1028n,24,cif,wXT3a4,15)

Hunter  from

JOELFALLON on 11/15/2004

Includes the following:  Non Sequitur Cartoon (S868)
.........................William Shatner As Denny Crane On Boston Legal - Video (S824)
.........................The Ex-wife (S836)
.........................Jackass 3D Paintball Duck Hunting - Video (S757)
.........................Non Sequitur Cartoon II (S1026)
.........................John Pinette's "Goes Camping" Stand-Up Routine - Video (S757)
.........................The World's Largest Army? America's Hunters (S831)
.........................FMG-9 Folding Gun - Video (S718)
.........................The (Lego) Lee Enfield Sniper Rifle - Video (S700b)
.........................Couple Lost While Hiking (S696b)
.........................Bizarro Cartoon II (S1004)
.........................Skeet Shootin' - Texas Style - Video (S687)
.........................Ole's Hunting Accident (S681b)
.........................The Swiss Room Box - Video (S791)
.........................Firearms Refresher Course (S538)
.........................Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women - Web Page (S840)
.........................Doctors Vs Guns (S439b, S606)
.........................The Battle Of Athens: Restoring The Rule Of Law - Video (S836)
.........................Anti-Gun Control Statistics (S493b)
.........................Short Hunting Jokes
..............................Tundra Comics (S856)
..............................Bizarro Cartoon (S778)
..............................Maine Moose Hunting Trip (S777)
..............................Gun Safety Knowledge - GIF (S736)
..............................Dilbert Comic Strip (S668b)
..............................The Argyle Sweater Cartoon (S827)
..............................The Wife's First Deer Hunt (S668b)
..............................Maxine On Camping And Grilling (S659)
..............................Vegetarian Is An Old Indian Word - Sign (S913)
..............................Whyatt Cartoons (S740)
..............................Popsicle Stick Riddle (S828)

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Subj:     Non Sequitur Cartoon (S868)
          By Wiley Miller on 8/28/2013
Source: http://www.gocomics.com/nonsequitur/2013/08/28
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Top
Subj:     William Shatner As Denny Crane
.............On Boston Legal, Seasons 1-5, 2004-08
          From: tom on 3/4/2012 (S824d)
 Source1: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/
..........List_of_Boston_Legal_characters
 Source2: http://bostonlegal.wetpaint.com/page/Episodes

 Boston Legal is a spin-off of long-running series The
 Practice.  Denny Crane (played by William Shatner) is
 the founder and senior partner of Crane, Poole ? Schmidt.
 Denny is a renowned attorney of some fifty years who
 claims he has never lost a case.  He considers himself a
 legend and loves to say his own name.

 I never saw an episode of Boston Legal, but after seeing
 these two videos, I wish I had watched this very funny
 show and amazingly pompous character.
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Subj: Denny Crane On Gun Control
Source: http://www.youtube.com/
........embed/_KvO-8IvoCI

Crane, and a junior partner names
Jerry Espenson, are robbed by a
black man in a parking garage.
Click 'HERE' to see now it plays out.

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Subj: Denny Crane For President
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Source: http://vimeo.com/1316146
 In Season 4 Episode 19 The Gods Must
 Be Crazy first aired on 5/14/08,
 some leading Republicans grilled
 Denny as a possible candidate for the
 President of the United States. Click
 'HERE' to see the interview.

Top
Subj:     The Ex-wife (S836)
          From: AFine963 on 1/15/2013

 Tim decided to tie the knot with his long time girlfriend.
 One evening, after the honeymoon, he was assembling some
 loads for an upcoming hunt.

 His wife was standing there at the bench watching him.
 After a long period of silence she finally speaks ...
 "Honey, I've been thinking ... now that we are married, I
 think it's time you quit hunting, shooting, handloading,
 and fishing.  Maybe you should sell your guns, boat, and
 airplane.

 Tim gets this horrified look on his face.

 She says, "Darling, what's wrong?"

 "There for a minute you were sounding like my ex-wife."

 "Ex-wife!", she screams, "I didn't know you were married before!"

 "I wasn't."

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Subj:     Jackass 3D Paintball Duck Hunting (S757)
          From: kgilmour2000on 7/14/2011 (in Redneck-Supp)
..........At: https://www.youtube.com/embed/oQKaDmyl5P4

 In Theaters on October 15th, 2010, The JACKASS pranksters
 are at it again in this third outing presented for the
 first time in 3D -- an effect that will no doubt redefine
 the use of the in-your-face technology.  Click 'HERE' to
 see this cute, bizarre, redneck stunt.

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Subj:     Non Sequitur Cartoon II (S1026)
          By Wiley Miller on 9/10/2016
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/nonsequitur/2016/09/10
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Top
Subj:     John Pinette's "Goes Camping" (S757d)
..........From: tom on 7/15/2011
 Source: (Removed by Image Entertainment)

 Click 'HERE' to see John Pinette doing his joke routine
 about camping in a 2006 stand-up, comedy routine.

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Subj:     The World's Largest Army? America's Hunters (S831)
          From: rfslick on 12/8/2012
 Source: (Removed from pittsreport.com)

 The state of Wisconsin has gone an entire deer hunting season
 without someone getting killed. That's great. There were over
 600,000 hunters.  Allow me to restate that number. Over the
 last two months, the eighth largest army in the world - more
 men under arms than Iran; more than France and Germany combined
 - deployed to the woods of a single American state to help keep
 the deer menace at bay.

 But that pales in comparison to the 750,000 who are in the
 woods of Pennsylvania this week.  Michigan's 700,000 hunters
 have now returned home. Toss in a quarter million hunters in
 West Virginia, and it is literally the case that the hunters
 of those four states alone would comprise the largest army in
 the world.

 The point?

 America will forever be safe from foreign invasion with that
 kind of home-grown firepower.  Hunting - it's not just a way
 to fill the freezer. It's a matter of national security.
 
I tried to check this article at snopes and urban legends
 with no luck.  The numbers were estimated correct at http://forum.
 opencarry.org/forums/showthread.php?88578-The-Wisconsin-Army

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Subj:     FMG-9 Folding Gun (S718d)
          From: darrellvip on 10/11/2010
..........At: https://www.youtube.com/embed/D99NHb6B03s

 Magpul showing off the FMG-9 concept folding gun.  Click
 'HERE' to the future of self-protection.

Top
Subj:     The (Lego) Lee Enfield Sniper Rifle
          By Jack Streat on 6/11/2010 (S700b,d)
 Source1: https://www.youtube.com/embed/H23HDHRVjpA
Photo from MOCPages.com
 Source2: http://www.wimp.com/fullyfunctional/

 This is a video of a working magazine-fed rifle in bolt-
 action configuration, with detachable magazines, sniper
 scope and bi-pod.  Bolt-action rifles were one of the
 first types of repeating rifle, along with the pump-
 action and lever-action.  They were used in WWI and WWII,
 as they are reliable and easy to use.  The mechanism is
 a pretty simple one, and because of this hardly ever jams.
 Click 'HERE' to see this amazing, Lego rifle.

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Subj:     Couple Lost While Hiking (S696b)
          From: Anonymous Jr. on 5/14/2010

 Steve took his new wife camping for the first time.  At
 every opportunity, he passed along outdoor- survival lore.
 One day they got lost hiking in the deep woods.  Steve
 tried the usual tactics to determine direction; moss on
 the trees (there was no moss), the direction of the sun
 (it was an overcast day).

 Just as his wife was beginning to panic, Steve spotted a
 small cabin off in the distance.  He pulled out his binoc-
 ulars, studied the cabin, then turned and led his wife
 right back to their camp.

 "That was terrific," she said, impressed. "How did you do
 it?"

 "Simple," he replied. "In this part of the country, all TV
 satellite dishes point south."

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Subj:     Bizarro Cartoon II (S1004)
          By Dan Piraro on 3/30/2016
 Source: http://bizarro.com/comics/march-30-2016/
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Top
Subj:     Skeet Shootin' - Texas Style (S687d)
          From: YouTube.com on 3/18/2010 (in You-Know-Supp)
..........At: https://www.youtube.com/embed/-VYjPlbTGiA

 Not really! It's an Aussie TV ad for Carlton Dry Lager.
 Click 'HERE' to enjoy it.

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Subj:     Ole's Hunting Accident (S681b)
          From: allenbergman on 1/26/2010

 Ole was out enjoying a nice morning of duck hunting when
 he decided to take a leak.  He walked over to a tree and
 propped up his shotgun.  Just then a gust of wind blew,
 the gun fell over and discharged shooting him in the
 genitals.

 Several hours later, lying in a hospital bed, he was
 approached by the doctor, who said, "Well Sir I have some
 good news and some bad news.  The good news is that you're
 going to be okay.  The damage was local to your groin.
 There was very little internal damage and we were able to
 remove all the buckshot.  The bad news is that there was
 some pretty intensive buckshot damage done to your penis.
 I'm going to have to refer you to my sister."

 "Vell, Ay guess dat isn't too bad," Ole replied. "Iss yewr
 sister von of dem plastic surgeons?"

 "Not exactly," answered the doctor.  "She's a flute player
 in the Minneapolis Symphony.  She's going to teach you
 where to put your fingers so you don't pee in your eye."

Top
Subj:     The Swiss Room Box (S791d)
          From: kgilmour2000 on 3/8/2012
 Source1: https://www.youtube.com/embed/3cy3gKwirLk
 Source2: http://manneli.com/movies/tech/Swiss-RoomBox.html

 The Swiss Room Box is the world's smallest motor home set.
It fits most cars and is now available
in North America.  But it's going to
cost you.  The SwissRoomBox is priced
over $8,000, plus overseas shipping.
Click 'HERE' to see this great way
to car camp..
Photo from TinyHouseTalk.com

Top
Subj:     Firearms Refresher Course (S538)
          From: jbcary1 on 5/10/2007

  1. An armed man is a citizen. An unarmed man is a subject.

  2. A gun in the hand is better than a cop on the phone.

  3. Colt: The original point and click interface.

  4. Gun control is not about guns; it's about control.

  5. If guns are outlawed, can we use swords?

  6. If guns cause crime, then pencils cause misspelled words.

  7. "Free" men do not ask permission to bear arms.

  8. If you don't know your rights you don't have any.

  9. Those who trade liberty for security have neither.

 10. The United States Constitution (c) 1791. All Rights reserved.

 11. What part of "shall not be infringed" do you not understand?

 12. The Second Amendment is in place in case the politicians
     ignore the others.

 13. 64,999,987 firearms owners killed no one yesterday.

 14. Guns only have two enemies: rust and politicians.

 15. Know guns, know peace, know safety.
     No guns, no peace, no safety.

 16. You don't shoot to kill; you shoot to stay alive.

 17. 911 - government sponsored Dial-a-Prayer.

 18. Assault is a behavior, not a device.

 19. Criminals love gun control -- it makes their jobs safer.

 20. If guns cause crime, then matches cause arson.

 21. Only a government that is afraid of its citizens
     tries to control them.

 22. You only have the rights you are willing to fight for.

 23. Enforce the "gun control laws" we ALREADY have,
     don't make more.

 24. When you remove the people's right to bear arms,
     you create slaves.

 25. The American Revolution would never have happened
     with gun control.

 26. "A government of the people, by the people,
     for the people..."

 "Those who hammer their guns into plows
  will plow for those who do not."
    -- Thomas Jefferson

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Subj:     Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women
          From: jcary on 2/9/2013 (S840d)
 Source: (Removed from iwastesomuchtime.com)

 I could NOT find a video of this Late Show With
 David Letterman's "Top 10 List", but I loved it
 too much to not post it on my site.   Click on
 'HERE' to learn why men prefer Guns over women.

Top
Subj:     Doctors Vs Guns (S439b, S606)
          From: jbcary1 on 6/21/2005
      and From: allenbergman on 8/13/2008

Doctors:

 (A) The number of doctors in the U.S. is 700,000.

 (B) Accidental deaths caused by physicians per year are 120,000.

 (C) Accidental deaths per physician is 17.14%.

 Statistics courtesy of the U.S.Dept of Health and Human Services

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Guns:

 (A) The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000
     (yes that's 80 million).

 (B) The number of accidental gun deaths per year,
     all age groups, is 1,500.

 (C) The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is 0.001875%.

 Statistics courtesy of the FBI

*************************************************************

 So statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more
 dangerous than gun owners.

*************************************************************

 Remember, guns don't kill people, doctors do.

*************************************************************

 FACT: NOT EVERYONE HAS A GUN, BUT ALMOST EVERYONE HAS
 AT LEAST ONE DOCTOR.

*************************************************************

 Please alert your friends to this alarming threat.  We must
 ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand!!!

*************************************************************
 Out of concern for the public at large, I have withheld
 statistics on lawyers for fear the shock would cause
 people to panic and seek medical attention.

Top
Subj:     The Battle Of Athens:
............Restoring The Rule Of Law (S836d)
          From: hendersonjrg on 1/15/2013
 Source1: https://www.youtube.com/embed/U5ut6yPrObw
 Source2: http://voxvocispublicus.homestead.com/Battle-of-Athens.html

 The Battle of Athens was an armed rebellion led by WWII
 veterans and citizens in Athens and Etowah, Tennessee,
 United States, against the tyrannical local government
 in August 1946.  This is from a movie made about the
 incident. The still pictures are actual photos of the
 incident. Comparing the photos to the movie clip, it
 seems that the movie didn't really show it as bad as
 it was.

 Click 'HERE' to see this important, 2nd Amendment
 rights, true story video.

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Subj:     Anti-Gun Control Statistics (S493b)
          From: gordonschuk

 (See 'Australian Gun Control' in Australian)

 WARNING -  This is a news article and NOT a joke.

 In 1911, Turkey established gun control.  From 1915 to 1917,
 1.5 million Armenians, unable to defend themselves, were
 rounded up and exterminated.

 In 1929, the Soviet Union established gun control.  From
 1929 to 1953, about 20 million dissidents, unable to defend
 themselves, were rounded up and exterminated.

 In 1935China established gun control.  From 1948 to 1952,
 20 million political dissidents, unable to defend themselves,
 were rounded up and exterminated.

 In 1938 Germany established gun control.  From 1939 to 1945,
 13 million Jews and others who were unable to defend them-
 selves were rounded up and exterminated.

 In 1956 Cambodia established gun control.  From 1975 to 1977,
 one million 'educated' people, unable to defend themselves,
 were rounded up and exterminated.

 In 1964 Guatemala established gun control.  From 1964 to 1981,
 100,000 Mayan Indians, unable to defend themselves, were
 rounded up and exterminated.

 In 1970 Uganda established gun control.  From 1971 to 1979,
 300,000 Christians, unable to defend themselves, were rounded
 up and exterminated.

 Defenseless people rounded up and exterminated in the 20th
 Century because of gun control: 56 million.

 It has now been 12 months since gun owners in Australia were
 forced by new law to surrender 640,381 personal firearms to
 be destroyed by their own government, a program costing
 Australia taxpayers more than $500 million dollars.

 The first year results are now in: Australia-wide, homicides
 are up 3.2 percent Australia-wide, assaults are up 8.6 percent
 Australia-wide, armed robberies are up 44 percent (yes, 44
 percent!) In the state of Victoria alone, homicides with
 firearms are now up 300 percent.

 (Note that while the law-abiding citizens turned them in, the
 criminals did not, and criminals still possess their guns!)

 While figures over the previous 25 years showed a steady
 decrease in armed robbery with firearms, this has changed
 drastically upward in the past 12 months, since the criminals
 now are guaranteed that their prey is unarmed.

 There has also been a dramatic increase in break-ins and
 assaults of the ELDERLY.  Australian politicians are at a
 loss to explain how public safety has decreased, after such
 monumental effort and expense was expended in "successfully
 ridding Australian society of guns."  The Australian
 experience and the other historical facts above prove it.

 You won't see this data on the American evening news or hear
 our president, governors or other politicians disseminating
 this information.

 Guns in the hands of honest citizens save lives and property
 and, yes, gun-control laws affect only the law-abiding citizens.

 The next time someone talks in favor of gun control, please
 remind them of this history lesson.

 With guns, we are citizens. Without them, we are subjects.


Subj:     Short Hunting/Camping Jokes
 

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Subj:     Tundra Comics (S856)
          Created by Chad Carpenter on 1/8/2012
Drawing from TundraComics.com...
 Source: https://www.facebook.com/tundracomics/photos/pb.22632009738
.........0341.-2207520000.1460232163./937302832948727/?type=3?theater
 Click 'HERE' to see this cute cartoon about duck hunting with a dog.
 

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Subj:     Bizarro Cartoon (S778)
          By Dan Piraro on 12/15/2011
 Source: http://bizarro.com/comics/december-15-2011/
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Subj:     Maine Moose Hunting Trip (S777)
          From: sam.hutkins on 12/3/2011
 Source1: http://jagahost.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=
..........otherarch?action=display?thread=12027?page=1
 Source2: http://www.snopes.com/photos/accident/mooseheads.asp
 Click 'HERE' to see this photo of a moose hunting trip.  It's
 a nice touch having the moose drinking Moosehead beer.
 
 

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Subj:     Gun Safety Knowledge (S736)
          From: tom on 2/9/2011
 How many errors in gun safety can you spot in this
 animated GIF of a nude woman firing a handgun?
 Click 'HERE' to test your knowledge.
 

Top
Subj:     Dilbert Comic Strip (S668b)
          By Scott Adams on 9/24/2009
 Source: http://dribibu.xs4all.nl/index.php/comics?pic=dilbert20090924
 Click 'HERE' to read this Dilbert comic strip about problems and opportunities.

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Subj:     The Argyle Sweater Cartoon (S827)
          by Scott Hilburn on 1/25/2007
          From: AFine963 on 11/13/2012
 Source: http://www.gocomics.com/theargylesweater/2007/01/25
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Subj:     The Wife's First Deer Hunt (S668b)
          From: tom on 10/28/2009
Photo from LazyManStuff.com
 Source: http://spititoutalready.xanga.com
........./714644610/wifes-first-deer-hunt/
 Click 'HERE' to read this cute joke.
 

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Subj:     Maxine On Camping And Grilling (S659)
          From: dawineguy on 8/4/2009
 Click 'HERE' to see eleven cartoons on Maxine's
 views on camping and grilling.
 

Top
Subj:     Vegetarian Is An Old Indian Word (S913)
          From: AFine963 on 7/3/2014
 Source: http://www.pinterest.com/pin/271834527481984368/
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Subj:     Whyatt Cartoons (S740)
          By Tim Whyatt
          From: gattica30 on 3/22/2011
 Source: http://callhart.com/crazy/2009/06/funny-cartoons/
 Tim Whyatt is from Adelaide, South Australia.  His cartoons
 are funny in a dirty Far Side kind of way.  Click 'HERE' to
 see this cartoon I especially liked.
 

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Subj:     Popsicle Stick Riddle (S828)
          From: Unilever
................Englewood Cliffs, NJ 07632
 Source: www.Popsicle.com
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...........Click 'HERE' to see all 22 riddles.
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............................From gattica30 on 2/22/09.
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