(Includes 49 jokes and articles)
Wash Day Tub
from
Unknown Source
| Subj: Bathroom
Supplement (Gz)
(Includes 49 jokes and articles) |
|
Wash Day Tub from Unknown Source |
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| Subj:
The Urinal Game (S505)
From: CleverMedia on 9/23/2006 |
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Test your knowledge of men's
room etiquette! You can play
the game at the source above,
or on my web site by clicking
'HERE'.
You can also download an .EXE
version of the game at
http://www.puzzle.dse.nl/tests/index.html
and go almost to
the bottom of the page.
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Subj: Taking
Your Child In The Stall (S576)
From: LABLaughsClean on 1/11/2008
My little guy, Cade, is quite
a talker. He loves to
communicate and does it quite
well. He talks to people
constantly, whether we're in
the library, the grocery
store or at a drive-thru window.
People often comment on
how clearly he speaks for a
just-turned- 3-year-old. And
you never have to ask him to
turn up the volume. It's
always fully cranked.
Cade continued, "Mommy, you ARE
going stinkies aren't you?
Oh, dats a good girl, Mommy!
Are you gonna get some candy for going stinkies on the potty?
Let me see doze stinkies, Mommy!
Oh ... Mommy! I'm trying
to see in dere.
Oh! I see dem. Dat is a
very good girl, Mommy. You are
gonna get some candy!
"I heard a few faint chuckles
coming from the stalls on
either side of me. Where
is a screaming newborn when you
need her? Good grief.
This was really getting embarrassing.
I was definitely waiting a long
time before exiting.
"Mommy! Would you get off
the potty, now? I want you to be
done going stinkies!
Get up! Get up!"
He grunted as he tried to pull
me off. Now I could hear full-
blown laughter. I bent
down to count the feet outside my door.
"Oh, are you wooking under dere,
Mommy? You wooking under da
door? What were
you wooking at, Mommy? You wooking at the
wady's feet? "
More laughter. I stood
inside the locked door and tried to
assess the situation.
"Mommy, it's time to wash our
hands, now. We have to go out
now, Mommy."
He started pounding on the door.
"Mommy, don't you want to wash your hands? I want to go out!!"
I saw that my "wait 'em out"
plan was unraveling. I sheepishly
opened the door, and found standing
outside my stall, twenty
to thirty ladies crowded around
the stall, all smiling and
starting to applaud.
My first thought was complete
embarrassment, then I thought,
"Where's the fine print on the
'motherhood contract' where I
signed away every bit of my
dignity and privacy?"
But as my little boy gave me
a big, cheeky grin while he
rubbed bubbly soap between his
chubby little hands, I thought,
I'd sign it all away again,
just to be known as Mommy to this
little fellow.
(Shannon Popkin is a freelance
writer and mother of three.
She lives with her family in
Grand Rapids, Michigan, where
she no longer uses public restrooms
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Subj:
Bathtub Toy (S600b in Pussy)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 7/7/2008 Source: http://www.buffalosjokes.com/j07.htm |
You can view this short, dirty,
cute movie at the above
source, or on my web site by
clicking 'HERE'.
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Subj: The
House Behind The House - Poem (S450)
From: RFSlick on 8/30/2005
One of my fondest memories
As I recall the days of yore
was the little house, behind
the house,
With the crescent o'er the door.
'Twas a place to sit and ponder
With your head all bowed down
low;
Knowing that you wouldn't be
there,
If you didn't have to go.
Ours was a multi-holer, three,
With a size for every one.
You left there feeling better,
After your job was done.
You had to make those frequent
trips
In snow, rain, sleet, or fog--
To that little house where you
usually
Found the Sears-Roebuck catalog.
Oft times in dead of winter,
The seat was spread with snow.
Twas then with much reluctance,
To that little house you'd go.
With a swish you'd clear that
wooden seat,
Bend low, with dreadful fear
You'd shut your eyes and grit
your teeth
As you settled on your rear.
I recall the day Ol' Granddad,
Who stayed with us one summer,
Made a trip out to that little
house
Which proved to be a bummer.
'Twas the same day that my Dad
had
Finished painting the kitchen
green.
He'd just cleaned up the mess
he'd made
With rags and gasoline.
He tossed the rags down in the
hole
Went on his usual way
Not knowing that by doing so
He'd eventually rue the day.
Now Granddad had an urgent call,
I never will forget!
This trip he made to the little
house
Stays in my memory yet.
He sat down on the wooden seat,
With both feet on the floor.
He filled his pipe and tapped
it down
And struck a match on the outhouse
door.
He lit the pipe and sure enough,
it soon began to glow.
He slowly raised his rear a
bit
And tossed the flaming match
below.
The Blast that followed, I am
told
Was heard for miles around;
And there was poor ol' Granddad
Sprawled out there on the ground.
The smoldering pipe still in
his mouth,
His eyes were shut real tight;
The celebrated three-holer
Was blown clear out of sight.
We asked him what had happened,
What he said I'll ne'er forget.
He said he thought it must have
been
The pinto beans he et!
Next day we had a new one
Dad put it up with ease.
But this one had a door sign
that read: No Smoking, Please!
Now that's the story's end my
friend,
Of memories long ago,
When we went to the house behind
the house,
because we had to go.
For those who never had to trot
out in the Cold.....
Just Give Thanks!!!
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Subj: Short
Urnal Jokes
| Subj:
Opus Comic Strip (S605c)
By Berkeley Breathed Sept. 30, 2007 From: Salon.com on 8/7/2008 (in Gays) |
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Subj:
Bathroom Time Monitored (S576)
From: LABLaughsClean on 1/10/2008 |
| Subj:
Bathroom Mirror Prank (S562b)
From: ginafm on 10/24/2007 |
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Subj:
Space Toilets (S561)
From: ginafm on 10/20/2007 and From: AFine963 on 3/21/2008 |
| Subj:
How To Get A Man To Wash His Hands (S557b)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 9/21/2007 |
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Subj:
Doonesbury On The Senator Craig Scandal (S556b)
By Garry Trudeau From: WashingtonPost.com on 9/10/2007 |
| Subj:
Men Can Multi-Task (S555)
From: rfslick on 9/1/2007 |
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Subj:
The Porta-Potti (S551b)
From: darrellvip on 8/10/2007 |
| Subj:
St. Bernard's Boy's Bathroom (S508b)
From: Mother Goose and Grimm comics on 10/19/2006 |
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Small cartoom from
www.grimmy.com |
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Subj:
The Toilet Seat Wars (S506b)
From: LABLaughsClean on 9/27/2006 |
| Subj:
A Dozen Amazing Toilets (S482)
From: jbcary1 on 4/13/2006 |
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Subj:
Kinky Toilet (S479b)
From: LABLaughsAdult20060320 on 3/20/2006 |
| Subj:
California Outhouse (S473c)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 2/9/2006 |
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Subj:
Bathroom Rules For Men (S461)
From: From: LABLaughsAdult on 11/17/2005 |
| Subj:
Bathroom Horror (S459b)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 11/9/2005 |
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Subj:
The Fly in the Armsterdam Urinal (S451)
From: RFSlick on 9/7/2005 |
Top
Subj: A Present
For People Who Have Rubbed You The Wrong Way (S450)
From: LABLaughsClean on 8/29/2005
Source: http://www.lablaughs.com/clean_toon.php?id=C19990509
To view the present you can
go to the source above, or my
web site by clicking 'HERE'.
| Subj:
Painted Floor (S432b)
From: darrell94590 on 5/2/2005 |
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Subj:
Saving Paper (S427)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 4/1/2005 |
| Subj:
His/Hers Restrooms Doors (S418b)
From: Buffalo's Jokes on 01/30/05 At: www.buffalosjokes.com/122929.htm |
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Subj:
Sleepy Pooh (S413b)
From: drgolfmd on 12/20/2004 |
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Subj: Toilet
Paper Directions (S411)
From: JokesUncut on 12/6/2004
What's dumb?
Directions on toilet paper.
--
What's dumber than that?
Reading them.
--
Even dumber?
Reading them and learning something.
--
Dumbest of all?
Reading them and having to correct
something
you've been doing wrong.
| Subj:
Can't Miss Urnal (S404)
From: LABLaughsAdulton 2/11/2004 At: http://www.ezines4all.com/at200310/007.htm |
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From: Joke-Of-The-Day on 11/28/2001
(S253 in Quotes3)
"Here's a bonehead error that
guys often commit in guest
bathrooms: They see soap on
a soap dish, and they use it to
wash their hands. This of course
ruins the guest soap, which
is defined as "soap that guests
are not supposed to use."
Its purpose is to match the
guest towels." -- Dave Barry
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Smiley takes a shower from
Smiley_Central |