facts1

>>>
Subj: Facts1 - True Storys (Gz)
(Includes 188 jokes and articles)

Banjo Bear from
PageWorks

Includes the following: Life Expectancy Calculator (S590)
.........................Fun Facts
.........................Other Cute Facts
.........................Amusing Irrelevant Facts
.........................Phun Phacts
.........................Ponderables
.........................Trippy Trivia
.........................Are You Normal?

This program will calculate your life Expectancy. You
can try this cute software at the above source, or on
my web site by clicking 'HERE'.

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Subj:     Fun Facts

Rene Descartes came up with the theory of coordinate geometry
by looking at a fly walk across a tiled ceiling.

If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front
legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has
one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of
wounds recieved in battle; if the horse has all four legs on
the ground, the person died of natural causes.

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English
law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with
anything wider than your thumb.

Ballroom dancing is a major at Brigham Young University.

Some biblical scholars believe that Aramaic (the language
of the ancient Bible) did not contain an easy way to say
"many things" and used a term which has come down to us as
40. This means that when the bible -- in many places --
refers to "40 days," they meant many days.

No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange,
silver, and purple.

Clans of long ago that wanted to get rid of their unwanted
people without killing them used to burn their houses down
- hence the expression "to get fired."

Canada is an Indian word meaning "Big Village".

There are two credit cards for every person in the United
States.

Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on
July 4th, John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the
rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't
added until 5 years later.

"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English
language.

The term "the whole 9 yards" came from WWII fighter pilots
in the South Pacific. When arming their airplanes on the
ground, the .50 caliber machine gun ammo belts measured
exactly 27 feet, before being loaded into the fuselage.
If the pilots fired all their ammo at a target, it got
"the whole 9 yards."

The original story from Tales of 1001 Arabian Nights
begins, "Aladdin was a little Chinese boy."

The most common name in the world is Mohammed.

Captain Jean-Luc Picard's fish was named Livingston.

The 'y' in signs reading "ye olde.." is properly
pronounced with a 'th' sound, not 'y'. The "th" sound
does not exist in Latin, so ancient Roman occupied
(present day) England used the rune "thorn" to represent
"th" sounds. With the advent of the printing press the
character from the Roman alphabet which closest resembled
thorn was the lower case "y".

The word "samba" means "to rub navels together."

The international telphone dialing code for Antarctica
is 672.

The glue on Israeli postage stamps is certified kosher.

The little bags of netting for gas lanterns (called
'mantles') are radioactive--so much so that they will set
off an alarm at a nuclear reactor.

Mel Blanc (the voice of Bugs Bunny) was allergic to carrots

Each unit on the Richter Scale is equivalent to a power
factor of about 32. So a 6 is 32 times more powerful than
a 5! Though it goes to 10, 9 is estimated to be the point
of total tetonic destruction (2 is the smallest that can
be felt unaided.)

Cinderella's slippers were originally made out of fur. The
story was changed in the 1600s by a translator.
It was the left shoe that Aschenputtel (Cinderella) lost at
the stairway, when the prince tried to follow her.

Until 1965, driving was done on the left-hand side on roads
in Sweden. The conversion to right-hand was done on a week-
day at 5pm. All traffic stopped as people switched sides.
This time and day were chosen to prevent accidents where
drivers would have gotten up in the morning and been too
sleepy to realize *this* was the day of the changeover.

Donald Duck's middle name is Fauntleroy.

The very first bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin during
World War II killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.

Dr. Seuss pronounced "Seuss" such that it rhymed with
"rejoice."

In Casablanca, Humphrey Bogart never said "Play it again,
Sam." Sherlock Holmes never said "Elementary, my dear
Watson." Captain Kirk never said "Beam me up, Scotty,"
but he did say, "Beam me up, Mr. Scott".

Duelling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are
registered blood donors.

More people are killed annually by donkeys than die
in air crashes.

The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named
after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank
Capra's "Its A Wonderful Life"

The flag of the Philippines is the only national flag that
is flown differently during times of peace or war. A
portion of the flag is blue, while the other is red. The
blue portion is flown on top in time of peace and the red
portion is flown in war time.

Armored knights raised their visors to identify themselves
when they rode past their king. This custom has become the
modern military salute.

The "huddle" in football was formed due a deaf football
player who used sign language to communicate and his team
didn't want the opposition to see the signals he used and
in turn huddled around him.

Goethe couldn't stand the sound of barking dogs and could
only write if he had an apple rotting in the drawer of his
desk.

If you are locked in a completely sealed room, you will
die of carbon dioxide poisoning first before you will die
of oxygen deprivation.

Carnivorous animals will not eat another animal that has
been hit by a lightning strike.

The term, "It's all fun and games until someone loses an
eye" is from Ancient Rome. The only rule during wrestling
matches was, "No eye gouging." Everything else was allowed,
but the only way to be disqualified is to poke someone's
eye out.

Mr. Rogers is an ordained minister.

Sir Isaac Newton was an ordained priest in the
Church of England.

A 'jiffy' is an actual unit of time for 1/100th
of a second.

The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.

Certain frogs can be frozen solid then thawed,
and continue living.

The Baby Ruth candy bar was actually named after
Grover Cleveland's baby daughter, Ruth.

Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that
makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.

Steve Young, the San Francisco 49ers quarterback, is the
great-great-grandson of Mormon leader Brigham Young.

Money isn't made out of paper, it's made out of linen.

Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10
of a calorie.

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Subj:    Other Cute Facts
         From: Scott's Joke Archive 0n 5/31/97

An ostrich's eye is bigger that it's brain.

The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds.

Many hamsters only blink one eye at a time.

Barbie's measurements if she were life size: 39-23-33.

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not
to have a full moon.

Columbia University is the second largest landowner in
New York City, after the Catholic Church.

The highest point in Pennsylvania is lower than the
lowest point in Colorado.

In the great fire of London in 1666 half of London was
burnt down but only 6 people were injured.

Lincoln Logs were invented by Frank Lloyd Wright's son.

One of the reasons marijuana is illegal today because
cotton growers in the 30s lobbied against hemp farmers
-- they saw it as competition. It is not chemically
addictive as is nicotine, alcohol, or caffeine.

Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

The name Wendy was made up for the book "Peter Pan".

From: igiggle on 11/6/2005 (S459b)
10 percent of all human beings ever born are alive
at this very moment.

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Subj:     Amusing Irrelevant Facts (S43)
          From: Daemonic Funnies Page

*The oldest known goldfish lived to 41 years of age.
     Its name was Fred.
*There is a town in Newfoundland, Canada called Dildo.
*Kotex was first manufactured as bandages, during WWI.
*Einstein couldn't speak fluently when he was nine.
     His parents thought he might be retarded.
*In 1983, a Japanese artist made a copy of the Mona Lisa
     completely out of toast.
*In 1984, a Canadian farmer began renting ad space on his cows.
*An average person laughs about 15 times a day.
*The average person is about a quarter of an
     inch taller at night.
*The condom - made originally of linen - was invented
     in the early 1500s.
*The first-known contraceptive was crocodile dung,
     used by Egyptians in 2000 B.C.
*America's first nudist organization was founded
     in 1929, by 3 men.
*A Saudi Arabian woman can get a divorce if
     her husband doesn't give her coffee.
*The Neanderthal's brain was bigger than yours is.
*The average bank teller loses about $250 every year.
*Every person has a unique tongue print.
*Women's hearts beat faster than men's.
*Only 55% of all Americans know that the sun is a star.
*Most American car horns honk in the key of F.
*About 70% of Americans who go to college do it just
     to make more money. [The rest of us are avoiding
     reality for four more years.]
*Sigmund Freud had a morbid fear of ferns.
*Most lipstick contains fish scales.
*Hypnotism is banned by public schools in San Diego.
*The three best-known western names in China: Jesus Christ,
     Richard Nixon, and Elvis Presley.
*27% of U.S. male college students believe life is
     "a meaningless existential hell."
*Thomas Edison was afraid of the dark.
*"Kemo Sabe" means "soggy shrub" in Navajo.

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Subj:     Phun Phacts
          From: TNKRTEACH on 97-03-26

* The Eisenhower interstate system requires that one mile
in every five must be straight. These straight sections
are usable as airstrips in times of war or other emergencies.

* The Boston University Bridge (on Commonwealth Avenue,
   Boston, Massachusetts) is the only place in the world
   where a boat can sail under a train driving under a car
   driving under an airplane.

* Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose
and ears never stop growing.

* David Prowse, was the guy in the Darth Vader suit in Star
   Wars. He spoke all of Vader's lines, and didn't know that
   he was going to be dubbed over by James Earl Jones until
   he saw the screening of the movie.

* In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.

* Montpelier, Vermont is the only U.S. state capital without
a McDonalds.

* The Pentagon, in Arlington, Virginia, has twice as many
   bathrooms as is necessary. When it was built in the 1940s,
   the state of Virginia still had segregation laws requiring
   separate toilet facilities for blacks and whites.

* The cruise liner, Queen Elizabeth II, moves only six
inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.

* Isaac Asimov is the only author to have a book in every
Dewey-decimal category.

* Cat's urine glows under a black light.

* Back in the mid to late 80's, an IBM compatible computer
   wasn't considered a hundred percent compatible unless it
   could run Microsoft's Flight
   Simulator.

* The first Ford cars had Dodge engines.

* Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.

* It takes about a half a gallon of water to cook macaroni,
and about a gallon to clean the pot.

* In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been
domesticated.

* Babies are born without knee caps. They don't appear
until the child reaches 2-6 years of age.

* Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously

* If you have three quarters, four dimes, and four pennies,
   you have $1.19. You also have the largest amount of
   money in coins without being able to make change for a
   dollar. (This would make a GREAT math brain teaser!)

* Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than
all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.
(How much did you pay for those new sneakers??)

* No NFL team which plays it's home games in a domed
stadium has ever won a Superbowl

* The only two days of the year in which there are no
   professional sports games (MLB, NBA, NHL, or NFL) are
   the day before and the day after the Major League All-
   Star Game.

And, last but certainly not least...

* The first toilet ever seen on television was on "Leave
It To Beaver".

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Subj:     Ponderables
          From: TNKRTEACH on 97-06-20

A duck's quack doesn't echo, and no one knows why.

In the 1940s, the FCC assigned television's Channel 1 to
mobile services (two-way radios in taxicabs, for instance)
but did not renumber the other channel assignments. That
is why your TV set has channels 2 and up, but no channel 1.

The "save" icon on Microsoft Word shows a floppy disk,
with the shutter on backwards.

The combination "ough" can be pronounced in nine different
ways. The following sentence contains them all: "A rough-
coated, dough-faced, thoughtful ploughman strode through
the streets of Scarborough; after falling into a slough,
he coughed and hiccoughed."

The verb "cleave" is the only English word with two
synonyms which are antonyms of each other: adhere and separate.

The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without
repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.

Facetious and abstemious contain all the vowels in the
correct order, as does arsenious, meaning "containing
arsenic."

Emus and kangaroos cannot walk backwards, and are on the
Australian coat of arms for that reason.

Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds, while dogs only
have about ten.

The word "Checkmate" in chess comes from the Persian phrase
"Shah Mat," which means "the king is dead".

Pinocchio is Italian for "pine head."

Camel's milk does not curdle.

In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.

An animal epidemic is called an epizootic.

Murphy's Oil Soap is the chemical most commonly used
to clean elephants.

The United States has never lost a war in which mules
were used.

Blueberry Jelly Bellies were created especially
for Ronald Reagan.

All porcupines float in water.

Hang On Sloopy is the official rock song of Ohio.

Did you know that there are coffee flavored PEZ?

Lorne Greene had one of his nipples bitten off by
an alligator while he was host of "Lorne Greene's
Wild Kingdom."

Cat's urine glows under a blacklight.

If you bring a raccoon's head to the Henniker, New
Hampshire town hall, you are entitled to receive
$.10 from the town.

The reason firehouses have circular stairways is from
the days of yore when the engines were pulled by horses.
The horses were stabled on the ground floor and figured
out how to walk up straight staircases.

Non-dairy creamer is flammable.

The airplane Buddy Holly died in was the "American Pie."
(Thus the name of the Don McLean song.)

Texas is also the only state that is allowed to fly it
s state flag at the same height as the U.S. flag.

The only nation who's name begins with an "A", but
doesn't end in an "A" is Afghanistan.

Pamela Anderson Lee is Canada's Centennial Baby, being
the first baby born on the centennial anniversary of
Canada's independence.

When opossums are playing 'possum, they are not "playing."
They actually pass out from sheer terror.

The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch
every year because when it was built, engineers failed to
take into account the weight of all the books that would
occupy the building. (But you'd think that all the light-
weights and airheads that "study" there would balance that
out.)

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Subj:     Trippy Trivia (S34)
          From: Daemonic Funnies Page

Los Angeles's full name is "El Pueblo de Nuestra Senora
    la Reina de Los Angeles de Porciuncula."
If NASA sent birds into space they would soon die;
    they need gravity to swallow.
Bank robber John Dillinger played professional baseball.
If you toss a penny 10000 times, it will not be heads
    5000 times, but more like 4950. The heads picture weighs
    more, so it ends up on the bottom.
The glue on Israeli postage stamps is certified kosher.
If your eyes are six feet above the surface of the ocean,
    the horizon will be about three statute miles away.
The longest word in the English language, according to the Oxford
    English Dictionary, is pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis.
    The only other word with the same amount of letters is
    pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconioses, its plural.
    Hydroxydesoxycorticosterone and hydroxydeoxycorticosterones
    are the largest anagrams.
Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
The band Duran Duran got their name from an astronaut in the 1968
    Jane Fonda movie "Barbarella."
Cleo and Caesar were the early stage names
    of Cher and Sonny Bono.
Ben and Jerry's send the waste from making ice cream to
    local pig farmers to use as feed. Pigs love the stuff,
    except for one flavor: Mint Oreo.
The company providing the liability insurance for the
    Republican National Convention in San Diego is the same
    firm that insured the maiden voyage of the RMS Titanic.
Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer.
Dr. Samuel A. Mudd was the physician who set the leg of
    Lincoln's assassin John Wilkes Booth...and whose shame
    created the expression for ignominy, "His name is Mudd."
The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds.
The very first bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin during
    World War II killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.
Wilma Flintstone's maiden name was Wilma Slaghoopal, and
    Betty Rubble's Maiden name was Betty Jean Mcbricker.
A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.
The Ramses brand condom is named after the great pharaoh
    Ramses II who fathered over 160 children.
Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are
    registered blood donors.
The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named
    after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank
    Capra's "It's A Wonderful Life".
It was discovered on a space mission that a frog can throw
    up. The frog throws up its stomach first, so the
    stomach is dangling out of its mouth. Then the frog
    uses its forearms to dig out all of the stomach's
    contents and then swallows the stomach back down again.

>>>>>>>>>>>>(s edited to here)????????????????

White Out was invented by the mother of Mike Nesmith
    (Formerly of the Monkees)
Sylvia Miles had the shortest performance ever nominated
    for an Oscar with "Midnight Cowboy." Her entire role
    lasted only six minutes.
Charles Lindbergh took only four sandwiches with him on
    his famous transatlantic flight.
Gilligan of Gilligan's Island had a first name that was
    only used once, on the never-aired pilot show. His
    first name was Willy. The skipper's real name on
    Gilligan's Island is Jonas Grumby. It was mentioned
    once in the first episode on their radio's newscast
    about the wreck.
In England, the Speaker of the House is not allowed
    to speak.
Playing cards were issued to British pilots in WWII.
    If captured, they could be soaked in water and
    unfolded to reveal a map for escape.
The "L.L." in L.L. Bean stands for Leon Leonwood.
Ivory bar soap floating was a mistake. They had been
    overmixing the soap formula causing excess air bubbles
    that made it float. Customers wrote and told how much
    they loved that it floated, and it has floated ever since.
Studies show that if a cat falls off the seventh floor of a
    building it has about thirty percent less chance of
    surviving than a cat that falls off the twentieth floor.
    It supposedly takes about eight floors for the cat to
    realize what is occurring, relax and correct itself.
The saying "it's so cold out there it could freeze the
    balls off a brass monkey" came from when they had old
    cannons like ones used in the Civil War. The cannon-
    balls were stacked in a pyramid formation, called a
    brass monkey. When it got extremely cold outside they
    would crack and break off...Thus the saying.
Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two
    weeks otherwise it will digest itself.
A walla-walla scene is one where extras pretend to be
    talking in the background -- when they say "walla-walla"
    it looks like they are actually talking.
The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English
    law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with
    anything wider than your thumb.
101 Dalmatians and Peter Pan (Wendy) are the only two
    Disney cartoon features with both parents that are
    present and don't die throughout the movie.
'Stewardesses' is the longest word that is typed with only
    the left hand.
A whale's penis is called a dork.
Armadillos have four babies at a time and they are always
    all the same sex.
Armadillos are the only animal besides humans that can
    get leprosy.
To escape the grip of a crocodile's jaws, push your thumbs
    into its eyeballs -- it will let you go instantly.

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Subj:     Are You Normal?
          From: Scott's Joke Archive 0n 5/31/97

(Facts about Americans. Did you know that...)

Only 30% of us can flare our nostrils.
21% of us don't make our bed daily. 5% of us never do.
Men do 29% of laundry each week. Only 7% of women trust
    their husbands to do it correctly.
40% of women have hurled footwear at a man.
85% of men don't use the slit in their underwear.
67.5% of men were tightie whities (briefs).
The average bra size today is 36C whereas 10 years ago
    it was a 34B
85% of women wear the wrong bra size.
3 out of 4 of us store our dollar bills in rigid order
    with singles leading up to higher denominations.
13% of us admit to occassionally doing our
    offspring's homework.
91% of us lie regularly.
27% admit to cheating on a test or quiz.
29% admit they've intentionally stolen something
    from a store.
50% admit they regularly sneak food into movie theaters
    to avoid the high prices of snack foods.
90% believe in divine retribution.
10% believe in the 10 Commandments.
82% believe in an afterlife.
45% believe in ghosts.
13% (mostly men) have spent a night in jail.
29% of us are virgins when we marry.
58.4% have called into work sick when we weren't.
10% of us switch tags in the store to pay less for an item.
Over 50% believe in spanking - but only a child
    over 2 years old.
35% give to charity at least once a month.
How far would you go for $10 million? 25% would abandon
    their friends, family, and church. 7% would murder.
69% eat the cake before the frosting.
When nobody else is around, 47% drink straight
    from the carton.
85% of us will eat Spam this year.
70% of us drink orange juice daily.
Snickers is the most popular candy.
22% of us skip lunch daily.
9% of us skip breakfast daily.
66% of us eat cereal regularly.
22% of all restaurant meals include french fries.
14% of us eat the watermelon seeds.
Only 13% brush our teeth from side to side.
45% use mouthwash every day.
22% leave the glob of toothpaste in the sink.
The typical shower is 101 degrees F.
Nearly 1/3 of U.S. women color their hair.
9% of women and 8% of men have had cosmetic surgery.
53% of women will not leave the house without makeup on.
58% of women paint their nails regularly.
62% of us pop our zits.
33% of women lie about their weight.
10% of us claim to have seen a ghost.
57% have had deja vu. 49% believe in ESP.
4 out of 5 of us have suffered from hemorrhoids.
The average girl starts her period at age 12.
44% have broken a bone.
Only 30% of us know our cholesterol level.
14% have attended a self-help meeting.
15% regularly go to a shrink.
78% would rather die quickly than live in a retirement home.
46.5% of men say they ALWAYS put the seat down
    after they've used the toilet.
30% of us refuse to sit on a public toilet seat.
54.2% of us always wash our hands after using the toilet.
23.5% admit they don't always flush.
45.2% pee in the shower.
44.9% pee in the ocean.
28.1% pee in the pool.
55.2% will let someone else come in the bathroom while
    they're on the toilet.
39% of us peek in our host's bathroom cabinet. 17% have
    been caught by the host.
81.3% would tell an acquaintance to zip his pants.
29% of us ignore RSVP.
71.6% of us eavesdrop.
22% are functionally illiterate.
Less than 10% are trilingual.
37% claim to know how to use all the features on their VCR.
53% prefer ATM machines over tellers.
56% of women do the bills in a marriage.
2 out of 3 of us wouldn't give up our spouse even for
    a night for a million bucks.
20% of us have played in a band at one time in our life.
40% of us have had music lessons.
44% reuse tinfoil.
57% save pretty gift paper to reuse.
66% of women and 59% of men have used a mix to cook and
    taken credit for doing it fromscratch.
53% read their horoscopes regularly.
16% of us have forgotten our own wedding anniversary
    (mostly men)
59% of us say we're average-looking.
Blacks are more than twice as likely to call
    themselves beautiful.
90% of us depend on alarm clocks to wake us.
53% of us would take advice from Anne Landers.
28% of us have skinny-dipped. 14% with the opposite sex.
51% of adults dress up for a Halloween festivity.
On average, we send 38 Christmas cards every year.
20% of women consider their parents to be their best friends.
2 out of 5 have married their first love.
The biggest cause of matrimonial fighting is money.
Only 4% asked the parents' approval for their bride's hand.
1 in 5 men proposed on his knees.
6% propose over the phone.
71% can drive a stick-shift car.
45% of us consistantly follow the speed limit.
2/3 of us speed up at a yellow light. 1/3 of us
    don't wear seat belts.
12% of men never use their car blinkers.
44% of men tailgate to speed up the person in front of them.
25% of us drive after we've been drinking.
4 out of 5 sing in the car.
The average sexual experience lasts about 39 minutes.
Men say the average erect penis is 10". Women say it's 4".
56% of men have had sex at work.
1 in 3 of us have had an extramarital affair.
62% think there is nothing wrong with affairs.
60% of men and 54% of women have had a 1-night stand.
The most common fantasy is oral sex.
Women buy 4 out of every 10 condoms sold.
8% of us have regular anal sex.
58% like dirty talk during sex.
22% rent porno flicks at least once.

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