Subj:     Facts4
                 (Includes 165 jokes and articles, 31 1063n,3,cLf,wXT5a,2)

Bunny with Flower
Includes the following:  How Lincoln And John F. Kennedy Were Alike: (S158, S360)
.........................True/False Trivia Test (S186, S658)
.........................Top Ten Of Everything; Interesting - Poster (S677)
.........................New Years Day Trivia (S415)
.........................Phobia Trivia... (S302)
.........................American Trivia (S114)
.........................Fun Facts to Know and Flaunt (S114)
.........................Take A Guess (S86)
.........................True Stupidity (S82)
.........................Bondage Game And Their Dog, Rudy (S68)
.........................Isn't It Ironic (S67, S360b)
.........................Boeing Employees Go Rafting (S67, S569)
.........................3% Hydrogen Peroxide - Web Page (S587)
.........................Will The Real Dummy Please Stand Up? (S64)
.........................Did You Know? (S144)
.........................This Wacky World

Subj:     How Lincoln And John F. Kennedy Were Alike: (S158, S360)
          From: RFSlick on 02/10/2000

 Source: http://www.snopes.com/history/american/lincoln-kennedy.asp

 (See 'The Oswald Rock Band' in MUSIC-SUPP)
 Abraham Lincoln was elected to
    Congress in 1846.
 John F. Kennedy was elected to
    Congress in 1946.

 Abraham Lincoln was elected
    President in 1860.
 John F. Kennedy was elected
    President in 1960.

 The names Lincoln and Kennedy each contain seven letters.

 Both were particularly concerned with civil rights.
 Both wives lost children while in the White House.

 Both Presidents were shot on a Friday.
 Both were shot in the head.

 Both were shot in the presence of their wives.

 The Secretary of each President warned them not to go to the
    theater and to Dallas, respectively.

 Lincoln's Secretary was named Kennedy.
 Kennedy's Secretary was named Lincoln.

 Both were assassinated by Southerners.
 Both were succeeded by Southerners.

 Both successors were named Johnson.
 Andrew Johnson, who succeeded Lincoln, was born in 1808.
 Lyndon Johnson, who succeeded Kennedy, was born in 1908.

 John Wilkes Booth, who assassinated Lincoln, was born in 1839.
 Lee Harvey Oswald, who assassinated Kennedy, was born in 1939.

 Both assassins were known by their three names.
 Both names comprise fifteen letters.

 Booth ran from the theater and was captured in a warehouse.
 Oswald ran from the warehouse and was captured in a theater.

 Lincoln was shot at the theatre named "Kennedy."
 Kennedy was shot in a car called "Lincoln."

 Booth and Oswald were assassinated before their trials.

 To cap it all off,

 A week before Lincoln was shot, he was in Monroe, Maryland.
 A week before Kennedy was shot, he was in Marilyn Monroe.

 What do you think: Mystery or a statistical co-incidence?

 Some of these facts are NOT true according to Snopes.com at

Subj:     True/False Trivia Test (S186, S658)
          From: collins2 on 08/19/2000
      and From: tom on 8/11/2009

 Can you guess which of the following are true and which are false?

 1. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you
    up in the morning.

 2. Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button.

 3. A pack-a-day smoker will lose approximately 2 teeth every
    10 years.

 4. People do not get sick from cold weather; it's from being
    indoors a lot more.

 5. When you sneeze, all bodily functions stop, even your heart!

 6. Only 7 per cent of the population are lefties.

 7. Forty people are sent to the hospital for dog bites every minute.

 8. Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until
    they are 2-6 years old.

 9. The average person over 50 will have spent 5 years
    waiting in lines.

10. The toothbrush was invented in 1498.

11. The average housefly lives for one month.

12. 40,000 Americans are injured by toilets each year.

13. A coat hanger is 44 inches long when straightened.

14. The average computer user blinks 7 times a minute.

15. Your feet are bigger in the afternoon than
    any other time of day.

16. Most of us have eaten a spider in our sleep.

17. The REAL reason ostriches stick their head in the
    sand is to search for water.

18. The only two animals that can see behind themselves
    without turning their heads are the rabbit and the parrot.

19. John Travolta turned down the starring roles in
    "An Officer and a Gentleman" and "Tootsie."

20. Michael Jackson owns the rights to the
    South Carolina State anthem.

21. In most television commercials advertising milk,
    a mixture of white paint and a little thinner is
    used in place of the milk.

22. Prince Charles and Prince William NEVER travel on
    the same airplane, just in case there is a crash.

23. The first Harley Davidson motorcycle built in 1903
    used a tomato can for a carburetor.

24. Most hospitals make money by selling the umbilical
    cords cut from women who give birth.  They are used
    in vein transplant surgery.

25. Humphrey Bogart was related to Princess Diana.
    They were 7th cousins.

26. If coloring weren't added to Coca-Cola, it would be green.

    Answers below...

 They are all TRUE.... Now go back and think about #16!!!

Subj:     Top Ten Of Everything; Interesting (S677 in Lists-Supp)
          From: tom on 1/3/2010
Drawing from MarlerBlog.com

 Click 'HERE' to see these thirty-four fascinating lists
 from geography, top countries, vacation spots, auto facts,
 business & consumerism, and much, much more.

Subj:     New Years Day Trivia (S415)
          From: igiggle on 1/1/2005
 Source: (Removed from noahark.com/1/triviaholiday)

 New Years Day Trivia History

 New Years Day is the oldest of all holidays.  It was first
 observed in ancient Babylon about 4000 years ago.

 The Romans continued to observe the new year in late March,
 but their calendar was continually tampered with by various
 emperors so that the calendar soon became out of synchronization
 with the sun.

 In order to set the calendar right, the Roman senate, in
 153 BC, declared January 1 to be the beginning of the new
 year. But tampering continued until Julius Caesar, in 46 BC,
 established what has come to be known as the Julian Calendar.
 It again established January 1 as the new year.

 Although in the first centuries AD the Romans continued
 celebrating the new year, the early Catholic Church condemned
 the festivities as paganism.  But as Christianity became more
 widespread, the early church began having its own religious
 observances concurrently with many of the pagan celebrations,
 and New Year's Day was no different.

 During the Middle Ages, the Church remained opposed to
 celebrating New Years. January 1 has been celebrated as a
 holiday by Western nations for only about the past 400 years.

Subj:     Phobia Trivia... (S302)
          From: Joke-Of-The-Day on 11/14/2002

    is the fear of long words.

    is the fear of beds.

    is a fear of children.

    is a fear of ventriloquist's dummies, animatronic
    creatures, wax statues or anything that falsly
    represents a sentient being.

 The Graveyard Shift
    In Victorian times, there was an intense fear of being
    buried alive, so when someone died, a small hole was
    dug from the casket to the surface, then a string was
    tied around the dead persons finger which was then
    attached to a small but loud bell that was hung on the
    surface of the grave, so then if someone was buried
    alive, they could ring the bell and whomever was on
    duty would go and dig them up.  Someone was on the
    clock 24 hours a day- hence the grave yard shift.

    is a morbid fear of sleep and falling asleep.

    is a morbid fear of insanity.

   is a fear of trivia about phobias

 Janet Leigh, the actress, has a fear of showers.  This
    is the result of appearing in the film, 'Psycho', in
    which her character met a violent death in the shower.

    is a fear of crossing the road

    is a fear of ugly people.

    is a fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth.

 Elizabeth I of England suffered from anthophobia, a fear of roses.

 Mondaphobia is the fear that the weekend will be too short
    and Monday's coming real fast!!! Enjoy the weekend!

Subj:     American Trivia (S114)
          From: smiles on 4/4/99

 (Also see 'Fun Facts to Know and Flaunt' below)

 Only 14% of Americans say they've done this with the
 opposite sex.  What is it? ~ Skinny dipping.

 What separates "60 Minutes," on CBS, from every other
 TV show? ~ No theme song/music.

 Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
 ~ Their birthplace. This is propinquity.

 Most boat owners name their boats.  What is the most
 popular boat name??  ~ Obsession

 More women do this in the bathroom than men.
 ~Wash their hands. Women * 80% - Men - 55%

 What do 100% of all lottery winners do?
 ~ Gain weight.

 In a recent survey, Americans revealed that this was their
 favorite smell. ~ Banana

 If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have
 to go until you would find the letter "A"? ~ One thousand

 What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield
 wipers and laser printers all have in common?
 ~ All invented by women. (GO GIRLS)

 Married men revealed that they do this twice as often as
 single men. ~ Change their underwear. EEWWWWWW

 This stimulates 29 muscles and chemicals causing relaxation.
 Women seem to like it light and frequent, men like it
 more strenuous. ~ A kiss

 This is the only food that doesn't spoil.
 ~ Honey

 There are more collect calls on this day than any other
 day of the year. ~ Father's Day

 What trivia fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is
 most ironic? ~ Mel was allergic to carrots.

 40% of all people who come to a party in your home do this?
 ~ Snoop in your medicine cabinet.

 3.9% of all women surveyed say they never do this.
 ~ Wear underwear. OH MY!!!!!!!

 About 1/3 of all Americans say they do this while sitting?
 ~Flush the toilet.

 What person, not a "Seinfeld" regular cast member, is
 featured on  every episode of "Seinfeld"?
 ~ Superman, either by name or pictures on Jerry's refrigerator.

Subj:     Fun Facts to Know and Flaunt (S114)
          From: Tom_Adams on 4/5/99

 (Also see 'American Trivia' above)

  1.  How many verses are there in the National Anthem
      of Greece?
  2.  How many ways are there to make change for a dollar?
  3.  What is the only fish able to blink with both eyes?
  4.  In which state is 2/3rd's of the world's eggplant grown?
  5.  What is the longest one-syllable word in the
      English language?
  6.  What flag is flying over the Parliament building
      on the Canadian two-dollar bill?
  7.  All the clocks in the movie Pulp Fiction are stuck
      on what time?
  8.  What is the only English word to end in "mt."
  9.  How many states are listed across the top of the
      Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill?
 10.  Almonds are members of which family of fruit?
 11.  Where was Winston Churchill born? (bonus question:
      during what event?)
 12.  The only state whose name is just one syllable is?
 13.  How many English words end in "-dous?"
 14.  What time is displayed on most advertisements
      with a watch?
 15.  What profession was listed on Al Capone's business card?
 16.  Who was the only real person who ended up as a Pez head?
 17.  Sesame Street characters Bert and Ernie were named
      after characters in which famous holiday movie?
 18.  What is the average life-span of a dragonfly?
 19.  What is a goldfish attention span?
 20.  Which denomination of US Currency has
      an owl and a spider hidden on it?
 21.  Who plays the piano on "Mad About You?"
 22.  Who was John Lennon's first girl friend?
 23.  What is the longest word typed by only one hand?

 The national anthem of Greece has 158 verses.
 There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.
 A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.
 Two-thirds of the world's eggplant is grown in New Jersey.
 The longest one-syllable word in the English language
    is "screeched."
 On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying
    over the Parliament building is an American flag.
 All of the clocks in the movie "Pulp Fiction" are
    stuck on 4:20.
 "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the
    letters "mt."
 All 50 states are listed across the top of the
    Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill.
 Almonds are a member of the peach family.
 Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.
 Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable.
 There are only four words in the English language which
    end in "-dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous,
    and hazardous.
 In most advertisements, including newspapers,
    the time displayed on a watch is 10:10.
 Al Capone's business card said he was a used-furniture dealer.
 The only real person to be a Pez head was Betsy Ross.
 The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame Street were named
    after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank
    Capra's "Its A Wonderful Life."
 A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours.
 A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.
 On an American one-dollar bill, there is an owl in the upper
    left-hand corner of the "1" encased in the "shield" and
    a spider hidden in the front upper right-hand corner.
 Who's that playing the piano on the "Mad About You" theme?
    Paul Reiser himself.
 John Lennon's first girlfriend was named Thelma Pickles.
 "Stewardesses" is the longest word that is typed with only
    the left hand.

Subj:     Take A Guess (S86)
          From: RFSlick on 98-09-17

 What occurs more often in December than any other month?

 A survey of 1000 American women and men revealed this
 as their least favorite household chore. What is it?
 Vacuuming the stairs.

 It is estimated that 9 out of 10 American women do this
 with their feet.  Wear shoes at least 2 sizes too narrow.

 In a recent survey, Americans were asked what
 one modern convenience they could not live without.
 The most common answer... Scotch tape.

 What separates "60 Minutes," on CBS from every
 other TV show?  No theme song.

 Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
 Their birthplace. This is propinquity.

 The average person will spend approximately one year
 out of their lifetime doing this. What is it?
 Searching for lost or misplaced items.

 Most boat owners name their boats. What is
 the most popular boat name requested?

 Most executives say this automatically eliminates a
 candidate from job consideration - what is it?
 A typo in their resume.

 More women do this in the bathroom than men.
 Wash their hands.Women - 80% Men - 55%

 If you're single, there's a 2 in 3 chance you did this
 the last time you were with your significant other.

 It takes an average person about 7 minutes to do this.
 Fall asleep.

 What is the most common name in the world?

 What do 100% of all lottery winners do?
 Gain weight.

 Surveys reveal that girls do this for the first time
 in their back yard.  First kiss.

 A "Bridal Guide" survey reveals that 77% of all newlywed
 couples do this.  Sex in rooms other than the bedroom.

 It takes an average woman 14 minutes to do this after
 she gets in bed.  Turn off the lights.

 If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you
 have to go until you would find the letter "A"?
 One thousand

 The odds are 1 in 2 that your best friend will do this
 if you are a married man.
 Fantasize about your wife.

 Hockey legend Wayne Gretsky does this for good luck.
 Only tucks in the right side of his jersey.

 What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield
 wipers and laser printers all have in common?
 All invented by women.

 Some Men are pee pee shy in public. Experts agree that
 this will help them go.
 Multiply numbers in their head.

 Married men revealed that they do this twice as often
 as single men.  Change their underwear.

 This stimulates 29 muscles and chemicals causing relaxation.
 Women seem to like it light and frequent, men like it more
 strenuous.  A kiss

 What first went on sale to the public in pharmacies
 on May 9, 1960?  Birth control pills

 42% of all women over the age of 26 who have done this,
 never get married.  Had an affair with a married man.

 Who is "Lisa Gheradini"?
 DaVinci's Mona Lisa

 This is the only food that doesn't spoil.

 There are more collect calls on this day than any other
 day of the year.  Father's Day

 The average woman spends 2.7 years of her life where?
 In the bathroom.

 40% of all people who come to a party in your home do this?
 Snoop in your medicine cabinet.

 3.9% of all women surveyed say they never do this.
 Wear underwear.

 What common everyday occurrence is composed of 59% nitrogen,
 21% hydrogen  and 9% dioxide?
 A fart.

 About 1/3 of all Americans say they do this while sitting?
 Flush the toilet.

 85% of the guys who die while having sex are doing this.
 Cheating on their spouse.

 What's unique about the Beatle's song "Eleanor Rigby"?
 The Beatles did not play a single note in the song.

Subj:     True Stupidity (S82)
          From: humorlist-digest V2 #190 on 98-08-15

 These stories are alleged to be true.  If so, they just
 prove some people's stupidity. If they aren't true, they
 certainly are funny!

 1. Police in Wichita, Kansas, arrested a 22-year-old man
    at an airport hotel after he tried to pass two
    (counterfeit) $16 bills.
 2. A man in Johannesburg, South Africa, shot his 49-year-
    old friend in the face, seriously wounding him, while
    the two practiced shooting beer cans off each other's head.
 3. A company trying to continue its five-year perfect safety
    record showed its workers a film aimed at encouraging the
    use of safety goggles on the job.  According to Industrial
    Machinery News, the film's depiction of gory industrial
    accidents was so graphic that twenty-five workers suffered
    minor injuries in their rush to leave the screening room.
    Thirteen others fainted, and one man required seven
    stitches after he cut his head falling off a chair while
    watching the film.
 4. The Chico, California, City Council enacted a ban on
    nuclear weapons, setting a $500 fine for anyone detonating
    one within city limits.
 5. A bus carrying five passengers was hit by a car in St.
    Louis, but by the time police arrived on the scene, four-
    teen pedestrians had boarded the bus and had begun to
    complain of whiplash injuries and back pain.
 6. A convict broke out of jail in Washington DC, then a few
    days later he accompanied his girlfriend to her trial for
    robbery.  At lunch, he went out for a sandwich.  She
    needed to see him, and thus had him paged.  Police
    officers recognized his name and arrested him as he
    returned to the courthouse in a car he had stolen over
    the lunch hour.
 7. Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by
    placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it
    with wires to a photocopy machine.  The message "He's
    lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the
    copybutton each time they thought the suspect wasn't
    telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was
    working, the suspect confessed.
 8. When two service station attendants in Ionia, Michigan,
    refused to hand over the cash to an intoxicated robber,
    the man threatened to call the police.  They still
    refused, so the robber called the police and was arrested.
 9. A Los Angeles man who later said he was "tired of walking,"
    stole a steamroller and led police on a 5 mph chase until
    an officer stepped aboard and brought the vehicle to a stop.

Subj:     Bondage Game And Their Dog, Rudy (S68)
          From: RFSlick on 98-05-20

 BREMERTON, WA - Christopher Coulter and his wife, Emily,
 were engaging in bondage games when Christopher suggested
 spreading peanut butter on his genitals and letting Rudy,
 their Irish Setter, lick them clean.  Sadly, Rudy lost
 control and began tearing at Christopher's penis and

 Rudy refused to obey commands and a panicked Emily threw a
 half-gallon bottle of perfume at the dog.  The bottle broke,
 covering the dog and Christopher with perfume.  Startled,
 Rudy leaped back, tearing away the penis.  While trying to
 get her unconscious husband in the car to take him to the
 hospital, Emily fell twice, injuring her wrist and ankle.

 Christopher's penis was in a Styrofoam ice cooler.  "Chris
 is just plain lucky," said the surgeon who spent eight
 hours reattaching the penis.  "Believe it or not, the
 perfume turned out to be very fortuitous.  The high alcohol
 content, which must have been excruciatingly painful, helped
 sterilize the wound.  Aside from its being removed, the
 damage caused by the dog's teeth to the penis per se is
 minimal.  It's really a very stringy piece of flesh.  Mr.
 Coulter stands an excellent chance of regaining the use of
 his limb because of this."

 Washington Animal Control has no plans to seize Rudy.

Subj:     Isn't It Ironic (S67, S360b)
          From: RFSlick on 98-05-13

 Story #1
 The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon
 Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.  At a special
 ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were
 released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from
 onlookers.  A minute later they were both eaten by a
 killer whale.

 Story #2
 A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen,
 shaking frantically with what looked like a wire running
 from his waist towards the electric kettle.  Intending to
 jolt him away from the deadly current she whacked him
 with a handy plank of wood by the back door, breaking
 his arm in two places.  A shame as he had merely been
 listening to his walkman.

 Story #3
 Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the
 cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn.
 Suddenly the pigs, all two thousand of them, escaped
 through a broken fence and stampeded, trampling the
 two hapless protesters to death.

 And the last and best.......

 Story #4
 and From: darrellvip on 4/19/2008 (S587c)
 Iraqi terrorist, Khay Rahnajet, didn't pay enough
 postage on a letter bomb. It came back with "return
 to sender" stamped on it.  You guessed it, he opened
 it and said a fond farewell to his face.

 This is a good story, but Snopes.com says it is just an urban
 legend at http://www.snopes.com/humor/lists/fakenews.asp

Subj:     Boeing Employees Go Rafting (S67, S569)
          From: Tom_Adams on 98-05-12

 Seems that a year ago, some Boeing employees on the sly
 decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s.  They
 were successful in getting it out of the plant and home.
 When they took it for a float on the Stilliguamish River,
 they were quite surprised by a coast guard helicopter
 homing in on the emergency locator that is activated when
 the raft is inflated.  They are no longer employed there.

Subj:     3% Hydrogen Peroxide (S587)
          From: tom on 4/19/2008
Drawing from Snopes.com...
 Source: http://www.snopes.com/medical/homecure/peroxide.asp

 Hydrogen peroxide will cure a variety of ailments.
 Click 'HERE' to read some of them.

Subj:     Will The Real Dummy Please Stand Up? (S64)
          From: auntieg on 98-04-16

 Will the Real Dummy Please Stand Up?!
 AT?T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying
 he lacked "intellectual leadership".  He received a $26
 million severance package.


 ...With a Little Help from Our Friends!
 Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to
 subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home.
 After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered
 that the man was standing beside them, shouting pleas to
 come out and give himself up...


 ...And What Was Plan B?
 An Illinois man pretending to have a gun kidnapped a
 motorist and forced him to drive to two different
 automated teller machines.  The kidnapper then proceeded
 to withdraw money from his own bank accounts...


 ...Some Days, It Just Doesn't Pay to Gnaw Through the Straps...
 Fire investigators on Maui have determined the cause of a
 blaze that destroyed a $127,000 home last month - a short
 in the homeowner's newly installed fire prevention alarm
 system.  "This is even worse than last year," said the
 distraught homeowner, "when someone broke in and stole my
 new security system..."


 ... And for the Main Course...
 A man in Taormina, Italy was hospitalized after swallowing
 46 teaspoons, 2 cigarette lighters, and a pair of salad tongs.


 ...The Getaway
 A man walked in to a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Shop, and asked
 for all the money in the cash drawer.  Apparently, the take
 was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the
 counter himself for three hours until police showed up and
 grabbed him.


 ...Do-It-Yourself Brain Surgery?!
 In Ohio, an unidentified man in his late twenties walked
 into a police station with a 9-inch wire protruding from
 his forehead and calmly asked officers to give him an X-ray
 to help him find his brain, which he claimed had been
 stolen.  Police were shocked to learn that the man had
 drilled a 6-inch deep hole in his skull with a Black and
 Decker power drill and had stuck the wire in to try and
 find the missing brain.


 ...Have I Got a Deal for You!
 More than 600 people in Italy wanted to ride in a spaceship
 badly enough to pay $10,000 a piece for the first tourist
 flight to Mars.  According to the Italian police, the would-
 be space travelers were told to spend their "next vacation
 on Mars, amid the splendors of ruined temples and painted
 deserts.  Ride a Martian camel from oasis to oasis and
 enjoy the incredible Martian sunsets.  Explore mysterious
 canals and marvel at the views.  Trips to the moon also
 available."  Authorities believe that the con men running
 this scam made off with over six million dollars...


 ...Too Well-Educated
 In Medford, Oregon, a 27-year-old jobless man with an
 MBA blamed his college degree for his murder of three
 people.  "There are too many business grads out there,"
 he said. "If I had chosen another field, all this may
 not have happened..."


 ...Did I Say That?!
 Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect
 who just couldn't control himself during a lineup.  When
 detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the
 words, "Give me all your money or I'll shoot," the man
 shouted, "That's not what I said!"


 ...Ouch, That Smarts!
 A bank robber in Virginia Beach got a nasty surprise when
 a dye pack designed to mark stolen money exploded in his
 Fruit-of-the-Looms.  The robber apparently stuffed the
 loot down the front of his pants as he was running out
 the door.  "He was seen hopping and jumping around," said
 police spokesman Mike Carey, "with an explosion taking
 place inside his pants."  Police have the man's charred
 trousers in custody...


 ...Are We Not Communicating?
 A man spoke frantically into the phone: "My wife is pregnant
 and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this
 her first child?" the doctor asked.  "No, you idiot!" the
 man shouted. "This is her husband!"


 ...Not the Sharpest Knife in the Drawer!
 In Modesto, CA, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying
 to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon.  King
 used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun, but unfor-
 tunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.

Subj:     Did You Know? (S144)
          From: RFSlick on 98-03-17
      and From: TA989287 on 11/01/1999

 The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time
    television were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
 Coca-Cola was originally green.
 Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US
 It is possible to lead a cow upstairs but not downstairs.
 Smartest dogs: 1) Scottish border collie; 2) Poodle;
    3) Golden retriever.  Dumbest: Afghan hound.
 Hawaiian alphabet has 12 letters.
 Men can read smaller print than women; women can hear better.
 Amount American Airlines saved in 1987 by eliminating one
    olive from each salad served in first class: $40,000
 City with the most Rolls Royce's per capita: Hong Kong
 State with the highest percentage of people who
    walk to work: Alaska
 Percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%
 Percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%
 Average number of days a West German goes without
    washing his underwear: 7
 Percentage of American men who say they would marry
    the same woman if they had it to do all over again: 80%
 Percentage of American women who say they'd marry
    the same man: 50%
 Cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400
 Average number of people airborne over the US
    any given hour: 61,000.
 Percentage of Americans who have visited
    Disneyland/Disney World: 70%
 Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches.
 Only President to win a Pulitzer: John F. Kennedy for
    Profiles in Courage
 Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
 The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and in lived
    in China in 1910.
 The youngest pope was 11 years old.
 Iceland consumes more Coca-Cola per capita than any other nation.
 First novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
 The San Francisco Cable cars are the only
    mobile National Monuments
 Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king
    from history. Spades - King David, Clubs - Alexander the
    Great, Hearts - Charlemagne, and Diamonds - Julius Caesar.
 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
 The name Jeep came from the abbreviation used in the army
    for the "General Purpose" vehicle, G.P.
 How about these.... The nursery rhyme Ring Around the Rosey
    is a rhyme about the plague. Infected people with the
    plague would get red circular sores ("Ring around the
    rosey..."), these sores would smell very badly so common
    folks would put flowers on their bodies somewhere
    (inconspicuously), so that it would cover the smell of
    the sores ("...a pocket full of poseys ..."), People who
    died from the plague would be burned so as to reduce the
    possible spread of the disease ("...ashes, ashes, we all
    fall down!")

From: homeschooling.guide on 99-01-17
 A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
 The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30
    times its own weight and always falls over on its right
    side when intoxicated.
 Polar bears are left handed.
 The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds, that makes
    the catfish rank #1 for animal having the most taste buds.
 The flea can jump 350 times its body length, that is
    like a human jumping the length of a football field.
 A cockroach will live nine days without it's head,
    before it starves to death.
 The male praying mantis cannot copulate while
    its head is attached to its body. The female
    initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
 Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
 Butterflies taste with their feet.
 Elephants are the only animals that can't jump. (thankfully)
 Starfishes haven't got brains.

From: RFSlick on 99-02-14
 Almonds are members of the peach family.
 Ingrown toenails are hereditary.
 Steely Dan got their name from a sexual device
    depicted in the book 'The Naked Lunch'.
 It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.
 Cranberries are sorted for ripeness by bouncing them;
    a fully ripened cranberry can be dribbled like a basketball.
 To "testify" was based on men in the Roman court swearing
    to a statement made by swearing on their testicles.

Subj:     This Wacky World
          From: Ossama's Laugh on 1/31/98

 (Taxes In Italy)
 Fruit stall owner Giuseppe Scirrocco, who stopped paying
 taxes two years ago because he couldn't afford them, has
 been landed with a 12-billion lira (app. US$7 million) tax
 bill by officials in Milan, Italy.

 (Divorce From 'I do' At Wedding)
 Teacher Jack Fesneau refused to speak to his wife Christina
 for more than two years because of the way she said "I do"
 at their wedding.  Christina, from Quebec, Canada, has been
 granted a divorce.

 Police have decided not to prosecute Rashon Jackson, 19,
 after he phoned the emergency services to get directions
 to a bus station in New Jersey.

 (Divorce Because Of Lottery)
 A Judge granted a divorce to Percy Quentin because his wife
 Thelma organized a lottery - with herself as the prize.
 After selling 600 tickets at US$5 each in Los Angeles, US,
 the winner was a 73-year-old man.

 (Anton's Polish Nose)
 Anton Wladich's snoring has become so loud since breaking
 his nose, that most of his street's residents in Warsaw,
 Poland, have moved house to escape the noise.

 (Polish Dating Agency)
 Furious girls in Lodz, Poland, are demanding a refund after
 paying US$800 to join a dating agency which had 300 women
 - but just seven men.

 (Underwear Factory In Russia)
 An underwear factory in Volgrad, Russia, is preventing
 redundancies (layoffs) by paying its staff with 36 pairs
 of free knickers a month.

 (Russian Truck Driver Drown In Beer)
 Trucker Boris Kalusch drowned after trying to drink from
 the beer tanker he was driving.  Police in Siberia found
 his legs sticking from the inspection cover.

 ((Robber Homesick For Prison)
 Former prisoner James Knapp confessed to police that he'd
 robbed two stores in Oklahoma, US, because he missed his
 old cell-mates.  Police said they'd see if James could be
 reunited with his old friends.

 (Love Sick Orangutan)
 A zookeeper was pinned to the ground and had his trousers
 torn off - by a lovesick lady orangutan!  Ken Alrand had
 cared for Anna ever since she was rejected by her natural
 mother in infancy. But he never realised that she had
 developed a crush on him.  As Alrand was cleaning Anna's
 enclosure in Aalborg, Denmark, she pounced on him and
 ripped his pants off.  "She's obviously fallen in love
 with me," says Alrand. "So I'll keep my distance from
 now on."

 (Six People Injured In Moscow)
 Six people taken to hospital from a reception in Moscow
 were injured by flying champagne corks.

 (Scared in Australia)
 Scared Charles Hurden locked himself in his shed for three
 days after he thought asteroids landed in his garden in
 Sydney, Australia.  They were luminous balloons from a
 party 16 km away.

 (Carolina Bank Robber)
 Gunman Simon Kingstree failed to rob a bank in Carolina,
 US, because staff kept laughing at his big ears - even
 when he threatened to shoot a cashier.

 (Cigarette Saboteur)
 A man dubbed by police in Athens, Greece as The Cigarette
 Saboteur has taken to attacking people he sees smoking
 and forcing them to eat their remaining cigarettes.  The
 oddball has claimed seven victims in six months.

 (Pervert On Subway)
 A pervert who exposed himself on the Paris Metro [subway]
 in France fled in horror when his victim - a transvestite
 - flashed back.

 (Marauding Moose)
 Marauding moose have torn up seven light aircraft in less
 than a week at Anchorage Airport in Alaska.

 A burglar charged with raiding vending machine paid his
 bail with US$300 in coins.

 (Golf Match Ends)
 A golf match in Los Angeles, US, was abandoned when a cow
 wandered onto the fairway, deposited a cow-pat on the 17th
 green and then chased the players.

 Raindancer Jose Carquirre has been charged with manslaughter
 after six people died in a flood in Arcos, Brazil.

                           -(o o)-
.............................From Smiley_Central