>>>
Subj: Strange
Laws
(Includes 162 jokes and articles, 24 1102n,8,cf,vXT2b5a,3) |
|
Scales of Justice
from
Best Animations
|
.
Includes the following: Can
You Recite The Ten Commandments? - Comic Strip (DU)
.........................Top
10 U.S. Sex Laws - List (S772)
.........................International
Sex Laws (S140)
.........................Strange
Sex Laws (S58)
.........................The
48 Laws of Power - Video/List (S775)
.........................The
Asshole Bill of Rights (S594b)
.........................New
California Laws Effective 7/1/07 (S546c)
.........................The
Limbaugh Laws - Video (S485c)
.........................Murphy's
Law of Technology And The Internet (S437, DU)
.........................Murphy's
Laws and Others (S234)
.........................Law
Of Mechanical Repair - Photo (S983)
.........................Murphy's
Laws of Work (S317, S677)
.........................Variations
On Murphy's Law (S158, DU)
.........................Addemdum
To Murphy's Law (S251, S618c)
.........................Not
A Jumper - Cartoon (S439)
.........................Crazy
Laws (S59)
.........................More
Crazy Laws (S193)
.........................Pickles
Comic Strip (S1049)
.........................Short
Law Jokes
..............................Mallard
Fillmore On Light Bulbs (S600b)
Also see BIRDS-DUCKS - 'The
Laws Of Ducks'
CARSMURPHY - 'Murphy's
Laws Applied To Cars'
CARTOON file - 'Cartoon
Laws of Physics'
COMP-SUPP - 'Murphy's
Laws Of Computing'
INDIAN file - 'The
Dead Horse Theory' - Drawing
LAWYER1 file - 'The
Lawyer Wins One......'
LISTS file - 'Laws
To Remember'
MOTHERS-SUPP - 'Murphy's
Law For Moms'
MOVIES2-SUPP - 'NCIS
- Gibbs Rules' - Video
POLITICAL2 - 'Non
Sequitur Cartoon'
SCIENCE1 file- 'Laws
In Science, Engineering, And Life'
......................-
'Finagle's
Laws, Creed, and Motto'
......................-
'Clarke's
Laws'
......................-
'Murphy's
Laws Of Research'
SEX2 LAWS - 'Sex
Laws'
SOLDIER-SUPP - 'Murphy's
Military Laws...'
============================================================Top
Subj: Can
You Recite The Ten Commandments? (DU)
Cartoonest David Horsey
Source: http://www.decrepitoldfool.com/images/
.........01/know10commandments-partial.gif
.
...........
.
.
Top
(Also see 'SEX
Laws' below)
Click 'HERE'
to see the Top 10 U.S. Sex Laws.
Top
Subj: International
Sex Laws (S140)
From: FrankRoesc on 10/03/1999
Rules, rules, rules always something
to control your behavior?
Well, check these out.
And you guys thought we had it bad here.
Most Middle Eastern countries
recognize the following Islamic
law: After having sexual
relations with a lamb, it is a mortal
sin to eat its flesh."
(umm ok, I'm sure the lamb appreciates
that one)
In Lebanon, men are legally allowed
to have sex with animals,
but the animals must be female.
Having sexual relations with a
male animal is punishable by
death. (OK, like THAT makes sense)
In Bahrain, a male doctor may
legally examine a woman's genitals,
but is forbidden from looking
directly at them during the exam-
ination. He may only see
their reflection in a mirror.
Muslims are banned from looking
at the genitals of a corpse. This
also applies to undertakers;
the sex organs of the deceased must
be covered with a brick or piece
of wood at all times. (...a
brick?????)
The penalty for masturbation
in Indonesia is decapitation.
(wonder how they enforce that
one??)
There are men in Guam whose full-time
job is to travel the
countryside and deflower young
virgins, who pay them for the
privilege of having sex for
the first time. Reason: under Guam
law, it is expressly forbidden
for virgins to marry. (now let's
just think for a minute...is
there any job anywhere else in the
world that even comes close
to this?)
In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife
is legally allowed to kill her
adulterous husband, but may
only do so with her bare hands. (the
husband's lover, on the other
hand, may be killed in any manner
desired).
Topless saleswomen are legal
in Liverpool, England - but only in
tropical fish stores.
(of course!!)
In Cali, Colombia, a woman may
only have sex with her husband,
and the first time this happens
her mother must be in the room to
witness the act. (shudder
at the thought)
In Santa Cruz, Bolivia it is
illegal for a man to have sex with a
woman and her daughter at the
same time. (...we have to presume
this was abig enough problem
that they had to pass this law...?)
In Maryland, it is illegal to
sell condoms from vending machines
with one exception: prophylactics
may be dispensed from a vending
machine in places where alcoholic
beverages are sold for consump-
tion on the premises."
(Is this a great country or what?)
Top
Subj: Strange
Sex Laws (S58)
From: RFSlick on 98-03-10
(Also see 'Top
10 U.S. Sex Laws' above)
In Ventura County, California,
cats and dogs are not allowed
to have sex without a permit.
If a police officer in Coeur
d'Alene, Idaho, suspects a
couple is having sex inside
a vehicle they must honk their
horn three times, and wait two
minutes before being allowed
to approach the scene.
A law in Oblong, Illinois makes
it a crime to make love
while fishing or hunting on
your wedding day.
In Ames Iowa a husband may not
take more than three gulps
of beer while lying in bed with
his wife, or holding you
in his arms.
A law in Alexandria, Minnesota
makes it illegal for a
husband to make love to his
wife if his breath smells like
garlic, onions, or sardines.
A Helena, Montana law states
that a woman cannot dance on
a saloon table unless her clothing
weights more than three
pounds, two ounces.
Hotel owners in Hastings, Nebraska
are required by law to
provide a clean, white cotton
nightshirt to each guest.
According to the law, no couple
may have sex unless they
are wearing the nightshirts.
Any couple making out inside
a vehicle, and accidentally
sounding the horn during their
lustful act, may be taken
to jail according to a Liberty
Corner, New Jersey law.
During lunch breaks in Carlsbad,
New Mexico, no couple
should engage in a sexual act
while parked in their vehicle,
unless their car has curtains.
In Nevada sex without a condom
is considered illegal.
In Harrisburg, Pennsylvania it
is illegal to have sex with
a truck driver inside a toll
booth.
Hotels in Sioux Falls, South
Dakota, are required by law to
furnish their rooms with twin
beds only. There should be a
minimum of two feet between
the beds, and it is illegal for
a couple to make love on the
floor between the beds.
In Kingsville, Texas, there is
a law against two pigs having
sex on the city's airport property.
A Tremonton, Utah law states
that no woman is allowed to have
sex with a man while riding
in an ambulance. In addition to
normal charges, the woman's
name will be published in the
local newspaper. The man
does not receive any punishment.
In the state of Washington there
is a law against having sex
with a virgin under any circumstances.
(including the wedding
night)
In Connorsville, Wisconsin no
man shall shoot of a gun while
his female partner is having
a sexual orgasm.
The only acceptable sexual position
in Washington D.C. is the
missionary-style position. Any
other sexual position is
considered illegal. (So this
is how they plan on getting Clinton)
From: Ossama's Laugh on 1/31/98
Bozeman, Montana, has a law that
bans all sexual activity
between members of the opposite
sex in the front yard of a
home after sundown -- if they're
nude. (Apparently, if you
wear socks, you're safe from
the law!)
In Cleveland, Ohio women are
not allowed to wear patent-
leather shoes.
Clinton, Oklahoma has a law against
masturbating while
watching two people having sex
in a car.
In Detroit, couples are not allowed
to make love in an
automobile unless the act takes
place while the vehicle
is parked on the couple's own
property.
A law in Fairbanks, Alaska does
not allow moose to have
sex on city streets.
A state law in Illinois mandates
that all bachelors should
be called master, not mister,
when addressed by their
female counterparts.
An excerpt form brilliant Kentucky
state legislation. "No
female shall appear in a bathing
suit on any highway within
this state unless she be escorted
by at least two officers
or unless she be armed with
a club".
The following important ammendment
however is to be
considered here: "The provisions
of this statuate shall not
apply to females weighing less
than 90 pounds nor exceeding
200 pounds, nor shall it apply
to female horses."
In Merryville, Missouri, women
are prohibited from wearing
corsets because "The privilege
of admiring the curvaceous,
unencumbered body of a young
woman should not be denied to
the normal, red-blooded American
male."
In Michigan, a woman isn't allowed
to cut her own hair
without her husband's permission.
An ordinance in Newcastle, Wyoming,
specifically bans
couples from having sex while
standing inside a store's
walk-in meat freezer!
In Norfolk, Virginia, a woman
can't go out without wearing
a corset. (There was a civil-service
job -- for men only
-- called a corset inspector.)
In Oxford, Ohio, it's illegal
for a woman to strip off her
clothing while standing in front
of a man's picture.
Utah state legislation outlaws
all sex with anyone but your
spouse. Next to that adultery,
oral and anal sex, mastur-
bation are considered sodomy
and can lead to imprisonment.
Sex with an animal - unless
performed for profit - however
is NOT considered sodomy. Polygamy
- provided only the
missionary position has been
applied - is only a misdemeanor.
In Willowdale, Oregon no man
may curse while having sex
with his wife.
Top
Subj:
The 48 Laws of Power (S775d)
Written by Robert Greene
From: philsam on 11/20/2011 |
 |
Photo from Amazon.com |
Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_48_Laws_of_Power
The 48 Laws of Power is a 1998
book by Robert Greene.
Greene takes elements of some
of the worlds greatest
political thinkers of our time
to come up with the 48
Laws of Power, from Niccol?
Machiavelli to Sun Tsu, he
captures their most important
points of power. The
book was immediately successful,
selling more than 1
million copies in the US, as
were his follow-up works,
The Art of Seduction and The
33 Strategies of War.
Unlike most self-help books,
"The 48 Laws" offers advice
that the author freely admits
is, at times, cunning and
amoral. It includes lessons
like "Law 1: Never outshine
the master" and "Law 14: Pose
as a friend, work as a spy."
The lessons are distilled from
colorful anecdotes lifted
from 4,000 years of history.
They include insights into
the scheming of powerful people
such as Al Capone, P.T.
Barnum and Henry Kissinger.
Click 'HERE'
to read Greene's list of 48 Laws of Power.
.
|
|
Also on this web page
is a video of Robert Greene's
insights from his book The 50th Law.
In this book,
Photo from AllVoices.com |
Greene talks about whether anyone
can learn to be fearless.
He gives an example of working
together with the rapper 50
Cents.
Top
Subj: The
Asshole Bill of Rights (S594b)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 5/27/2008
The Asshole Bill of Rights As
an ASSHOLE,
I proclaim the following:
#1 I will live my life the way
I deem fit, screw political
correctness.
#2 I have the right to choose
my religious path if I
choose one at = all. Christianity
be damned.
#3 If I want to eat a cow, I
will eat a cow.
#4 I have the right to hang up
on telemarketers
midsentence and not have to
worry about whether
or not I was polite.
#5 If I think someone's an idiot,
I will tell them
they're an idiot.
#6 I have the right to tell children
that their parents
aren't raising them correctly.
(Think of how many times
you've been at a supermarket
and heard a screaming child
the entire time...what exactly
would you want to say
that'd be any nicer?)
#7 If you don't know what you're
talking about, shut the
hell up.
#8 You may have the right to
speak, but I don't have to
listen to you.
#9 If I want to be rude, loud,
and obnoxious, it's a
free country.
#10 If I want to go to a bar,
destroy my liver with
alcohol, clog my arteries with
junk , and have unsafe
sex with the woman/man I just
met, I ought to be able
to smoke while I'm at it.
#11 I may be fat, but you're
ugly, and I can go to
Jenny Craig.
#12 Jerry Springer for President!!!!!!!
#13 Denis Leary should be proclaimed
God and given
reign over society.
#14 Your daughter just got drunk
at a party, made a
slut of herself, and you're
worried about my
religious beliefs?
#15 Before you tell me how to
run my life, be
certain that your own is squeaky
clean.
#16 Just because you work at
McDonald's doesn't
mean you have an excuse to have
an I.Q. under
twelve.
#17 (Courtesy of George Carlin)
Just because you're a
student does not mean that you're
any more enlightened
than someone that works at Blockbuster.
#18 Speaking of Blockbuster,
if I return the tape, you do
not have to actually sue me
for $15!!
#19 If you're stupid enough to
give me credit, deal with
the consequences.
#20 It's ignorant to charge someone
$25 if they bounce a
check for $5. (If I didn't have
the $5, what makes you
think I'm going to have $25
you retards!!)
#21 If you don't like the way
I drive then at the next red
light get out from under my
car.
#22 If your dog or cat is so
smart, then why do you talk
to it like it's a newborn baby?
#23 If I shoot you while you're
committing a crime, and
you try to sue me for it, I'll
shoot you again.
#24 Courtesy of Ben Franklin:
Anyone who would give up
freedoms and liberties for temporary
security deserves
neither freedom or security.
#25 If you live in Tornado Alley,
don't whine when you get
hit by a tornado.
Top
Subj: New
California Laws effective 7/1/07 (S546c)
From: edapsmas on 6/25/2007
New Driving Fines for 2007
1. Carpool lane - 1st time $1068.50
starting 7/1/07 (The
$271 posted on the highway is
old). Don't do it again
because 2nd time is going to
be double. 3rd time triple,
and 4th time license suspended.
2. Incorrect lane change - $380.
Don't cross the lane on
solid lines or intersections.
3. Block intersection - $485
4. Driving on the shoulder -
$450
5. Cell phone use in the construction
zone. - Double fine
as of 07/01/07. Cell phone
use must be "hands free" while
driving.
6. Passengers over 18 not in
their seatbelts - both
passengers and drivers get tickets
.
7. Speeders can only drive 3
miles above the limit.
8. DUI = JAIL (Stays on your
driving record for 10 years!)
9. As of 07/01/07 cell phone
use must be "hands free"
while driving. Ticket
is $285. They will be looking for
this like crazy - easy money
for police department.
These traffic laws are just another
Urban Legend. Thank you
Chris for catching my error.
You can read Snopes.com's
report on this false email at
the following address:
http://www.snopes.com/politics/traffic/california.asp
Top
|
|
Subj:
The Limbaugh Laws (S485c,d in Mexican)
From: darrell94590 on 5/8/2006 |
Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/N2JrjBRz940
You can see this video of Rush
Limbaugh's opinions
about imigration by clicking
'HERE'.
Top
Subj: Murphy's
Law of Technology And The Internet (S437, Du)
From: Joke-Of-The-Day-Mail.com on 6/14/2005
Murphy's Technology Law #1 --
You can never tell which way the
train went
by looking at the track.
Murphy's Technology Law #2 --
Logic is a systematic method of
coming to
the wrong conclusion with confidence.
Murphy's Technology Law #3 --
Technology is dominated by those
who manage
what they do not understand.
Murphy's Technology Law #4 --
If builders built buildings the
way programmers
wrote programs, then the first woodpecker
that came
along would destroy civilization.
Murphy's Technology Law #5 --
All great discoveries are made
by mistake.
Murphy's Technology Law #6 --
Nothing ever gets built on
schedule
or within budget.
Murphy's Technology Law #7 --
All's well that ends... period.
Murphy's Technology Law #8 --
A meeting is an event at which
minutes are
kept and hours are lost.
Murphy's Technology Law #9 --
The first myth of management is
that it exists.
Murphy's Technology Law #10 --
A failure will not appear
until a unit
has passed final inspection.
Murphy's Technology Law #11 --
New systems generate new
problems.
Murphy's Technology Law #12 --
Any given program, when
running,
is obsolete.
Murphy's Technology Law #13 --
A computer makes as many
mistakes
in two seconds as 20 men working 20 years make.
Top
Subj: Murphy's
Laws and Others (S234)
From: pns on 7/23/2001
Murphy's Laws and Other Observations
Murphy's Laws
Murphy's First Law: Nothing is
as easy as it looks.
Murphy's Second Law: Everything
takes longer than you think.
Murphy's Third Law: Whatever
can go wrong, will go wrong.
Murphy's Fourth Law: If there
is a possibility of several
things going wrong, the one that will cause the
most damage will be the one to go wrong.
Murphy's Fifth Law: If anything
just cannot go wrong,
it will anyway.
Murphy's Sixth Law: If you perceive
that there are four
possible ways in which a procedure can go wrong
and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared
for, will promptly develop.
Murphy's Seventh Law: Left to
themselves, things tend to go
from bad to worse.
Farnsdick's corollary: After
things have gone from bad to
worse, the cycle will repeat itself.
Murphy's Eight Law: If everything
seems to be going well,
you have obviously overlooked something.
Murphy's Ninth Law: Nature always
sides with the hidden flaw.
Murphy's Tenth Law: Mother Nature
is a witch.
Murphy's Eleventh Law: It is
impossible to make anything
foolproof, because fools are so ingenious.
O'tooles Commentary On Murphy's
Laws
Murphy was an optimist.
Ginsberg's Theorems
1. You can't win.
2. You can't even
break even.
3. You can't even
quit the game.
Forsyth's Second Corollary to
Murphy's Laws
Just when you see the
light at the end of the tunnel,
the roof caves in.
Weilers Law
Nothing is impossible
for the man who doesn't have
to do it himself.
The Laws of Computer
Programming
1. Any give program, when running,
is obsolete.
2. Any given program costs more
and takes longer
each time it is
run.
3. If a program is useful, it
will have to be changed.
4. If a program is useless,
it will have to be documented.
5. Any given program will expand
to fill all
the available memory.
6. The value of a program is
inversely proportional to
the weight of its
output.
7. Program complexity grows
until it exceeds the capability
of the programmer
who must maintain it.
Top
Subj: Law
Of Mechanical Repair (S983)
From: Todd Anderson on Facebook on 10/26/2015
Source: http://www.cafepress.com/+law_of_mech
.........anical_repair_tile_coaster,195118439
.
..........
.
.....Click
on the source to buy this TILE COASTER for $10.99.
.
.
Top
Subj: Murphy's
Laws of Work (S317, S677)
From: JBCARY1 on 2/27/2003
1. To err is human, to forgive
is not company policy.
2. Don't be irreplaceable.
If you can't be replaced,
you can't
be promoted.
3. The more crap you put up
with,
the more
crap you are going to get.
4. A pat on the back is only
a few centimeters
from a kick
in the pants.
5. Eat one live toad the first
thing in the morning and
nothing worse
will happen to you the rest of the day.
6. Never ask two questions
in a business letter. The
reply will
discuss the one you are least interested
in and say
nothing about the other.
7. When the bosses talk about
improving productivity,
they are
never talking about themselves.
8. If at first you don't succeed,
try again. Then quit.
No use being
a darn fool about it.
9. There will always be beer
cans rolling on the floor
of your car
when the boss asks for a ride home from
the office.
10. Mother said there would
be days like this,
but she never
said there would be so many.
11. Keep your boss's boss off
your boss's back.
12. Everything can be filed
under "miscellaneous."
13. Never delay the ending of
a meeting or the
beginning
of a cocktail hour.
14. You can go anywhere you
want if you look serious
and carry
a clipboard.
15. Anyone can do any amount
of work provided it
isn't the
work he is supposed to be doing.
16. Important letters that contain
no errors will
develop errors
in the mail.
17. The last person that quit
or was fired will be the
one held
responsible for everything that goes wrong.
18. There is never enough time
to do it right the first
time, but
there is always enough time to do it over.
19. The more pretentious a corporate
name, the smaller
the organization.
(For instance, The Murphy Center
for Codification
of Human and Organizational Law,
contrasted
to IBM, GM, AT?T...).
20. If you are good, you will
be assigned all the work.
If you are
really good, you will get out of it.
Top
Subj: Variations
On Murphy's Law (S158, DU)
From: icohen on 02/07/2000
1. The Law of Common Sense
Never accept
a drink from a urologist.
2. The Law of Reality
Never get
into fights with ugly people, they have
nothing to
lose.
3. The Law of Self Sacrifice
When you
starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.
4. The Law of Volunteering
If you dance
with a grizzly bear, you had better
let him lead.
5. The Law of Avoiding Oversell
When putting
cheese in a mousetrap, always leave
room for
the mouse.
6. The Law of Motivation
Creativity
is great, but plagiarism is faster.
7. Boob's Law
You always
find something in the last place you look.
8. Wailer's Law
Nothing is
impossible for the man who doesn't have
to do it
himself.
9. Law of Probable Dispersal
Whatever
hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
10. Law of Volunteer Labor
People are
always available for work in the past tense.
11. Conway's Law
In any organization
there is one person who knows what
is going
on. That person must be fired.
12. Iron Law of Distribution
Them that
has, gets.
13. Law of Cybernetic Entomology
There is
always one more bug.
14. Law of Drunkenness
You can't
fall off the floor.
15. Heeler's Law
The first
myth of management is that it exists.
16. Osborne's Law
Variables
won't; constants aren't.
17. Main's Law
For every
action there is an equal and opposite
government
program.
18. Weinberg's Second Law
If builders
built buildings the way programmers wrote
programs,
then the first woodpecker that came along
would have
destroyed civilization.
Top
Subj: Addemdum
To Murphy's Law (S251, S618c)
From: TNKRTEACH on 97-04-09
and
From: darrellvip on 11/10/2008
1. Everyone has a photographic
memory. Some don't
have film.
2. He who laughs last, thinks
slowest.
3. A day without sunshine is
like, well, night.
4. Change is inevitable, except
from a vending machine.
5. Back up my hard drive? How
do I put it in reverse?
6. I just got lost in thought.
It was unfamiliar territory.
7. When the chips are down,
the buffalo is empty.
8. Seen it all, done it all.
Can't remember most of it.
9. Those who live by the sword
get shot by those who don't.
10. I feel like I'm diagonally
parked in a parallel universe.
11. He's not dead, he's electroencephalographically
challenged.
12. She's always late. Her ancestors
arrived on the Juneflower.
13. You have the right to remain
silent. Anything you
say will
be misquoted, then used against you.
14. I wonder how much deeper
the ocean would be without
sponges.
15. Honk if you love peace and
quiet.
16. Pardon my driving, I'm reloading.
17. Despite the cost of living,
have you noticed how
it remains
so popular?
18. Nothing is foolproof to a
sufficiently talented fool.
19. It is hard to understand
how a cemetery raised its
burial costs
and blamed it on the high cost of living.
20. Just remember...if the world
didn't suck, we'd all
fall off.
21. The 50-50-90 rule:
Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of
getting something
right, there's a 90% probability
you'll get
it wrong.
22. It is said that if you line
up all the cars in the
world end
to end, someone would be stupid enough to
try and pass
them.
23. You can't have everything.
Where would you put it?
24. Latest survey shows that
3 out of 4 people make up 75%
of the world's
population.
25. If the shoe fits, get another
one just like it.
26. The things that come to those
that wait may be the
things left
by those who got there first.
27. Give a man a fish and he
will eat for a day. Teach
a man to
fish and he will sit in a boat all day
drinking
beer.
28. Flashlight: A case for holding
dead batteries.
29. Shin: A device for finding
furniture.
30. A fine is a tax for doing
wrong. A tax is a fine
for doing
well.
31. It was recently discovered
that research causes
cancer in
rats.
32. Everybody lies, but it doesn't
matter since nobody
listens.
33. I wish the buck stopped here,
as I could use a few.
34. I started out with nothing,
and I still have most
of it.
35. When you go into court, you
are putting yourself
in the hands
of 12 people that weren't smart enough
to get out
of jury duty.
36. Light travels faster than
sound. This is why some
people appear
bright until you hear them speak.
37. Great earth changes have
been predicted for the future.
So if you're
looking to avoid earthquakes, my advice is
simple.
When you find a fault, don't dwell on it.
Top
Subj: Not
A Jumper (S439)
By Dan Piraro on
6/21/2005
Source: http://bizarro.com/
.
.................
.
.
Top
Subj: Crazy
Laws (S59)
From: Ossama's Laugh on 1/5/98
Texas
A recently passed antcrime law
requires criminals to give
their victims 24 hours notice,
either orally or in writing,
and to explain the nature of
the crime to be committed...
In Lefors, it is illegal to take
more than three swallows
of beer at any time while standing...
In San Antonio, it is illegal
for both sexes to flirt or
respond to flirtation using
the eyes and/or hands....
Florida
It is illegal for single, divorced,
or widowed women to
parachute on Sunday afternoons.
In Saratoga, it is illegal to
sing while wearing a
bathing suit...
Nevada
It is illegal to drive a camel
on the highway...
In Eureka, men who wear moustaches
are forbidden from
kissing women...
California
In L.A. a man can legally beat
his wife with a leather strap,
as long as it is less than two
inches wide, or she gives him
permission to use a wider strap.....
It is illegal to set a mousetrap
without a hunting license....
Michigan
A state law stipulates that a
woman's hair legally belongs
to her husband....
Arkansas
A man can legally beat his wife,
but not more than
once a month...
Flirtation between the members
of the opposite sex on the
streets of Little Rock may result
in a 30 day jail term....
Utah
Birds have the right of way on
all highways...
A husband is responsible for
every criminal act commited by
his wife while she is in his
presence...
Baltimore
In Halethrope, it is illegal
to kiss for more than one second...
It is illegal to mistreat oysters....
In Baltimore it is illegal to
wash or scrub sinks, no matter
how dirty they get....
New York
In NYC it is illegal for a man
to turn around and look "at
a woman in that way", and violators
are forced to wear horse
blinders...
Tennessee
It is illegal to use a lasso
to catch a fish...
In Dyersburg, it is illegal for
a woman to call a man for a date...
In Memphis, it is illegal for
a woman to drive by herself;
"a man must walk or run in front
of the vehicle, waving a red
flag in order to warn approaching
pedestrians and motorists"....
Colorado
In Logan County, it is illegal
for a man to kiss a woman while
she is asleep....
Rhode Island
In Province it is illegal to
sell toothpaste ands toothbrush
to the same customer on a Sunday....
In Neewport, it is illegal to
smoke a pipe after sunset....
Oklahoma
Whale hunting is strictly forbidden
throughout the entire state...
In Tulsa, kisses lasing more
than three minutes are forbidden...
Massachusetts
In Salem, even married couples
are forbidden from sleeping
in the nude in rented rooms...
In Boston it is illegal to take
a bath unless one has been
ordered by a physician to do
so....
In 1659, the State outlawed Christmas...
Top
Subj: More
Crazy Laws (S193)
From: JOKE-OF-THE-DAY.com on 10/1/00
In Temperance, MS, you can't
walk a dog without dressing
it in diapers.
In St. Louis, a law on the books
makes it illegal to park
your car without turning off
the engine. This was to
avoid scaring horses.
In Kansas City, KS, saying the
name "George Washington"
without adding the phrase "blessed
be his name," can land
you with a fine of up to fifty
cents.
In California, selling a gold
piece without tooth marks in
it is considered forgery.
An old statute in Flint, MI,
compels dentists to offer a
"slug of whiskey with no additional
charge to said patient."
In Manchester, England, an ancient
law declares that if a
young man develops a lisp, he
must be inspected by a bishop
to ensure that he isn't developing
homosexual tendencies.
The city of San Francisco holds
a copyright on the name "San
Francisco." It is illegal to
manufacture any item with the
name without first getting permission
from the city. Since
the Supreme Court upheld the
copyright, San Francisco has
had an annual $300 million surplus
every year.
In Raleigh, North Carolina, before
a man asks for a woman's
hand in marriage, he must be
"inspected by all the barnyard
animals on the young woman's
family's property, to ensure a
harmonious farm life."
Slavery is still legal in Decatur,
Alabama.
In Salzburg, Germany, any child
born on August 18th must be
tested for possible witchcraft.
This is due to a local legend
that an evil warlock was born
on that day in 1638.
Top
Subj: Pickles
Comic Strip (S1049)
By Brian Crane
on 2/6/2017
Source: http://www.gocomics.com/pickles/2017/02/06
.
.
.
.
Subj: Short
Law Jokes
Top
You can read the Mallard Fillmore
comic strips on the new
fluorescent light bulb law by
clicking 'HERE'.
One of the reasons marijuana
is illegal today because cotton
growers in the 30s lobbied against
hemp farmers -- they saw
it as competition. It
is not chemically addictive as is
nicotine, alcohol, or caffeine.
From: Joke-of-the-Day.com on 1/5/2007
(S519b)
"Tell a man there are 300 billion
stars in the universe and
he'll believe you. Tell
him a bench has wet paint on it
and he'll have to touch it
to be sure." -- Murphy's Law
From: Joke-of-the-Day.com on 1/25/2007
(S523b)
"Laws are like sausages.
It's better not to see them
being made." -- Otto
von Bismarck
\\\//
-(o o)-
========================oOO==(_)==OOo=======================
.
............................. From
Smiley_Central
.
.
. |