Subj: Love (Gz)
(Includes 50 jokes and articles)
Click "Here" for Love-Supp
Love Mice from
AGAG Animation Gallery
| >>>
Subj: Love (Gz) (Includes 50 jokes and articles) Click "Here" for Love-Supp |
|
Love Mice from AGAG Animation Gallery |
Also see AUSTRALIAN - 'The
Great Aussie Love Poem'
CHRISTMAS1 - 'A
Box of Kisses'
CLOTHING file- 'T-Shirt
With Cute Sign II'
COMPUTER-SUPP- 'Why
You Forward Jokes'
FACTS3 file - 'A Kiss, the history'
FOOTBALL file- 'The
Stock Boy Falls In Love'
FROG file - 'Toad
Love Poem'
HOSPITAL2 - 'Rescuing
Hug'
JOBS3 file - 'Short
Human Relationship Training'
Kids3 file - 'If
You Love Something'
......................-
'What
Is Love?'
......................-
'More
What Is Love?'
......................-
'Kids
On Love And Marriage'
LETTERS2 file- 'A Love Letter'
MONKEY file - 'Monkey
Kissed'
MOTHERS file – 'Mean Moms'
NATIONAL-STS - 'A
West Virginia Love Story'
PROFESSOR - 'Professors
Define A Kiss'
SHIPS file - 'What's
Love'
TEAR JERKER2 - 'A
Moment In A Concentration Camp'
......................-
'The
Wallet'
THANKSGIVING - 'A
Thanksgiving Thought'
.........THOUGHTSLRND1-
'Happiness'
THOUGHTSLRND2- 'What
Really Matters'
THOUGHTS-TIME- 'How
To Stay Young By Anon'
.........THOUGHTS-WARM-
'Quotations
On Friendship'
......................-
'Thoughts
Of Eleanor Roosevelt'
......................-
'Friends'
......................-
(many
other file on friendship)
.........THO-WARM-SUPP-'Seven
Wonders Of The World II'
......................-
'The
SWF Movie - ILike'
.........VALENTINE
- (see whole file)
============================================================Top
| Subj:
Forbidden Love II (S436)
From: LABLaughsRiddles20050602 on 6/2/2005 |
 |
This SWF movie is the same as
Forbidden Love listed above.
You can view the SWF movie at
the source above, or on my
web site by clicking 'HERE'.
\\\//
-(o o)-
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Subj: Forbidden
Love (S406)
From: DoctorDebt on 10/29/2004
At: http://www.octanecreative.com/Parodyville/as_seen/caught.jpg
They were alone in the house.
It was a cold, dark, stormy night.
The storm had come up quickly
and each time the thunder boomed,
he watched her jump. She
looked across the room and admired
his strong appearance.
She wished that he would take her in
his arms, comfort her, protect
her from the storm. She wanted
that...
Then the power went out.
She screamed. He raced to the sofa
where she was cowering.
He did not hesitate to pull her into
his arms. He knew this
was a forbidden union and expected her
to pull back. He was surprised
when she didn't resist, but
instead clung to him.
The storm raged on, as did their growing
passion, and there came a moment
when each knew that they had
to be together. They knew
it was wrong. Their families would
not understand. But they
were so consumed in their passion
they didn't hear the door or
the click of the light switch.
The power was back on.......click
\\\//
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Subj: Two
Brooms In Love (S129b, S453b)
From: smiles on 6/7/99
and
From: darrell94590 on 9/21/2005
Two brooms were hanging in the
closet and after a while they
got to know each other so well,
they decided to get married.
One broom was, of course, the
bride broom, the other the
groom broom. The bride
broom looked very beautiful in her
white dress. The groom broom
was handsome and suave in his
tuxedo. The wedding was lovely.
After the wedding, at the wedding
dinner, the bride-broom
leaned over and said to the
groom-broom, "I think I am going
to have a little whisk broom!!!"
"IMPOSSIBLE !!" said the groom broom.
V
V
V
V
Are you ready for this?
V
V
V
V
Brace yourself; this is going to hurt.
V
V
V
V
Keep going on down.
V
V
V
V
"WE HAVEN'T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!"
Oh for goodness sake... laugh,
or at least groan. Life's too
short not to enjoy... even these
silly little cute..... and
clean jokes
Sounds to me like she's been "sweeping" around!!!!!!!!!!!!!
\\\//
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Subj: True
Love (S263c)
From: Joke-Of-The-Day on 2/13/2002
Kristy,
Below is a poem which expresses
the love
that I feel for you everyday
of my life!!
Your sweet and gentle kiss,
Makes life an eternal bliss.
Your beautiful smile makes everyday
worthwhile.
As I pass each day,
It becomes an impossible task
to keep my feelings at bay.
All the things that I want to
say,
And all of the emotions that
I want to portray.
To express them all there is
just no possible way,
This puts me in a state of total
disarray.
Amidst the wondering,
Through all of loves thundering.
I know, I will always know,
And that we will forever be,
Because I know that you are
the one for me!
Kristy I love you so much with
all my heart.
Happy Valentine's day!!! Will
you marry me?!?
Love Always,
Joe
\\\//
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Subj: Wealth,
Success, And Love (S262c)
From: gheckman on 2/6/2002
A woman came out of her house
and saw 3 old men with long
white beards sitting in her
front yard. She did not
recognize them. She said
"I don't think I know you, but
you must be hungry. Please come
in and have something to eat."
"Is the man of the house home?", they asked.
"No", she replied. "He's out."
"Then we cannot come in", they replied.
In the evening when her husband
came home, she told him what
had happened. "Go tell them
I am home and invite them in!"
The woman went out and invited
the men in.
"We do not go into a House together," they replied.
"Why is that?" she asked.
One of the old men explained:
"His name is Wealth," he said
pointing to one of his friends,
and said pointing to another
one, "He is Success, and I am
Love." Then he added, "Now go
in and discuss with your husband
which one of us you want in
your home."
The woman went in and told her
husband what was said. Her
husband was overjoyed.
"How nice!!", he said. "Since that
is the case, let us invite Wealth.
Let him come and fill
our home with wealth!"
His wife disagreed. "My dear, why don't we invite Success?"
Their daughter-in-law was listening
from the other corner
of the house. She jumped
in with her own suggestion: "Would
it not be better to invite Love?
Our home will then be
filled with love!"
"Let us heed our daughter-in-law's
advice," said the husband
to his wife. "Go out and invite
Love to be our guest."
The woman went out and asked
the 3 old men, "Which one of
you is Love? Please come
in and be our guest." Love got up
and started walking toward the
house. The other 2 also got
up and followed him. Surprised,
the lady asked Wealth and
Success: "I only invited Love,
Why are you coming in?"
The old men replied together:
"If you had invited Wealth or
Success, the other two of us
would've stayed out, but since
you invited Love, wherever He
goes, we go with him. Wherever
there is Love, there is also
Wealth and Success!"
\\\//
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Subj: Sitting
Close While You Drive (S228)
From: thebartend on 6/11/2001
A man and a woman are driving
down the highway when another
car passes them. The woman
notices the occupants of the
other car are young and obviously
in love. The girl is
sitting very close to her boyfriend
as they cruise down
the highway.
This causes the woman to think
back to when she and her
husband were young and in love,
and wondering where the
show of affection had disappeared
to over the years.
Finally she says to her husband,
"Remember when we used
to be like that young couple?
Where did the love go,
honey?"
Her question was met with a few
moments of silence. Then
he quietly replied, "I haven't
moved...."
\\\//
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Subj: The
Green Dog Teaches About Love (S393)
From: Imogenelumen on 8/5/2004
Read Each One Carefully and Think About It a Second or Two
1. I love
you not because of who you are,
but because of who I am when I am with you..
2. No man
or woman is worth your tears,
and the one who is, won't make you cry.
3. Just
because someone doesn't love you the way you want
them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.
4. A true
friend is someone who reaches for your hand
and touches your heart.
5. The
worst way to miss someone is to be sitting
right beside them knowing you can't have them.
6. Never
frown, even when you are sad, because you never know
who is falling in love with your smile.
7. To the
world you may be one person,
but to one person you may be the world.
8. Don't
waste your time on a man/woman,
who isn't willing to waste their time on you.
9. Maybe
God wants us to meet a few wrong people before
meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet
the person, we will know how to be grateful.
10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
11. There's
always going to be people that hurt you so
what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be
more careful about who you trust next time around.
12. Make
yourself a better person and know who you are
before you try and know someone else and expect them
to know you.
13. Don't
try so hard, the best things come
when you least expect them to.
REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON.
True friends: How many people
actually have 8 true friends?
Hardly anyone I know ! But some
of us have all right friends
and good friends!!!
You have been Tagged by the Green Dog!
,-._,-.
\/)"(\/
(_o_)
ruff!!!!!!
You will
Have Good Luck For Two Years if you send this to 8
people
or more and if this is sent back to you then you are
a true
friend......
\\\//
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Subj: The
Top 11 Hints For Life (S163)
From: gheckman on 3/11/00
1. It hurts to love someone
and not be loved in return,
but
what is more painful is to love someone and never
find
the courage to let that person know how you
feel.
2. A sad thing in life
is when you meet someone who
means
a lot to you, only to find out in the end that
it
was never meant to be and you just have to let go.
3. The best kind of friend
is the kind you can sit on a
porch
swing with, never say a word, and then walk
away
feeling like it was the best conversation you've
ever
had.
4. It's true that we don't
know what we've got until we
lose
it, but it's also true that we don't know what
we've
been missing until it arrives.
5. It takes only a minute
to get a crush on someone, an
hour
to like someone, and a day to love someone
but
it takes a lifetime to forget someone.
6. Don't go for looks;
they can deceive. Don't go for
wealth;
even that fades away. Go for someone who
makes
you smile because it only takes a smile to make
a dark
day seem bright.
7. Dream what you want
to dream; go where you want to
go;
be what you want to be; because you have only
one
life and one chance to do all the things you want
to.
8. Always put yourself
in the other's shoes. If you
feel
that it hurts you, it probably hurts the other
too.
9. A careless word may
kindle strife; a cruel word may
wreck
a life; a timely word may level stress; a
loving
word may heal and bless.
10. The happiest of people
don't necessarily have the
best
of everything, they just make the most of
everything
that comes along their way
11. Love begins with a
smile, grows with a kiss, ends
with
a tear. When you were born, you were crying and
everyone
around you was smiling. Live Life so that
when
you die... you are the one smiling and everyone
around
you is crying....
\\\//
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Subj: Have
You Ever (S140)
From: RFSlick on 10/06/1999
Have you ever
noticed that the worst way to miss
someone is
when they are right beside you and yet you
can never
have them...when the moment you can't feel
them under
your fingertips you miss them?
Have you ever
wondered which hurts the most; saying
something
and wishing you had not, or saying nothing
and wishing
you had?
I guess the
most important things are the hardest
things to
say. They are the things you get ashamed of
because words
diminsh them; words shrink things that
seemed timeless
when they were in your head...to no
more than
living size when they are brought out....
Don't be afraid
to tell someone you love them. If you
do, they
might break your heart...but if you don't,
you might
break theirs.
Have you ever
decided not to become a couple because
you were
so afraid of losing what you already had with
that person?
Your heart decides who it likes and who
it doesn't.
You can't tell your heart what to do. It
does it on
its own - when you least suspect it, or
even when
you don't want it to.
Have you ever
wanted to love someone with everything
you had,
but that other person was too afraid to let
you?
Too many of us stay closed up because we are too
afraid to
care too much...for fear that the other
person does
not care as much, or at all.
Have you ever
loved someone and they had absolutely no
idea whatsoever?
Or fell for your best-friend in the
entire world,
and then sat around and watched them
fall for
someone else?
Have you ever
denied your feelings for someone because
your fear
of rejection was too hard to handle? We
tell lies
when we are afraid....afraid of what we
don't know,
afraid of what others will think, afraid
of what will
be found out about us. But everytime we
tell a lie....the
thing we fear grows stronger. Life
is all about
risks and it requires you to jump. Don't
be a person
who has to look back and wonder what they
would have,
or could have had.
No one waits
forever., so
send this
to someone or some people
you care
the most about .
show them
you care .
let them
now
how you feel.
\\\//
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Subj: Love
(S119)
From: RFSlick on 5/10/99
I don't know where this came from, but it is special ______
The beginning of love, is to
let those we love be perfectly
themselves and not twist them
with our own image - otherwise,
we love only the reflection
of ourselves we find in them.
The happiest people don't necessarily
have the best of every-
thing... they just make the
most out of everything that comes
their way.
The best kind of friend is the
one you can sit on a porch
with, never saying a word and
then walk away, feeling like
that was the best conversation
you've had.
Don't go for looks - it can deceive.
Don't go for money - even wealth
fades away.
Go for someone who makes you
smile, because only a smile
makes a dark day seem bright.
Happiness lies for those who
cry, those who hurt, those who
have searched and those who
have tried. For only they can
appreciate the importance of
the people who have touched
their lives.
Love is when you take away the
feeling, the passion and the
romance... and you find out
you still care for that person.
Love comes to those who still
hope even though they've been
disappointed, those who still
believe, even though they have
been betrayed and those who
still love even though they've
been hurt before.
Maybe God wants us to meet a
few wrong people, before
meeting the right one, so that
when we finally meet the
right person, we should know
how to be grateful for that
gift.
It hurts to love someone and
not be loved in return. But,
what is the most painful is
to love someone and never find
the courage to let the person
know how you feel.
The brightest future will always
be based on a forgotten
past... you can't go on
in life until you let go of your
past failures and heartaches.
Giving someone all your love
is never an assurance that
they'll love you back!
Don't expect love in return, just
wait for it to grow in their
hearts. But, if it doesn't,
be content it grew in yours.
There are things that you would
love to hear, but you never
hear it from the person you
want to. Don't be deaf to hear
it from the person who says
it with their heart.
When you were born, you were
crying and everyone around you
was smiling. Live you
life so that when you die, you are
smiling and everyone around
you is crying.
When one door of happiness closes,
another opens. But often
we look so long at the closed
door, that we don't see the
one which has just been opened
for us.
Always put yourself in the other's
shoes. If you feel that
it hurts you, it probably hurts
the other person, too.
A sad thing about life is when
you meet someone who means a
lot to you... only to find out
in the end, that it was never
meant to be and you just have
to let go.
It takes a minute to have a crush
on someone... an hour to
like someone... a day to love
someone... but it takes a
lifetime to forget someone.
Love starts with a smile, develops
with a kiss and ends
with a tear.
\\\//
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Subj: LOVE,
n. (S115)
From: smiles on 4/11/99
Speaking of love -- that
wondrous emotion -- here are
what 38 people have said
about it:
[1] man's grand delusion
that one woman differs from
another;
[2] a sea of emotions
entirely surrounded by expenses;
[3] what Plato described
as "a grave mental disease";
[4] something they say
is blind; it's marriage
which is the real eye opener;
[5] that emotion which
is not true until returned;
[6] that delightful interval
between meeting a beautiful
girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock
{John Barrymore};
[7] is like measles;
much worse when it comes late in
life;
[8] the most slippery
word in the human language;
used by knaves to seduce, by fools for comfort,
and by most men to placate the female of the
species;
[9] the only fire for
which there is no insurance;
[10] an emotion, even
if unreturned, has its rainbow;
[11] the crocodile in
the river of desire {Bhartrihari c.
625};
[12] the only game that
two can play and both win;
[13] the last and most
serious of the childhood diseases;
[14] what makes marriage
possible; habit makes it last;
[15] is the wisdom of
the fool and the folly of the wise;
[16] a disease like measles,
we all have to go through
it;
[17] a temporary insanity
curable by marriage or the
removing of the patient from the influences under
which he or she incurred the disorder;
[18] the only game that
is never called on account of
darkness;
[19] the tie that blinds;
[20] consists of happiness,
given back and forth;
[21] the only thing that
has changed over the millions
of years of playing this game is that trumps have
changed from clubs to diamonds;
[22] that which makes
the world revolve;
[23] is really just being
stupid together;
[24] a situation which
happens when you think almost
as much of another as you do of yourself;
[26] is a fan club with
only two members;
[27] the only virtue that
can be divided endlessly
and still not be diminished;
[28] the triumph of imagination
over intelligence;
[29] the child of illusion
and the parent of disillusion;
[30] a strange feeling
that comes over a man; when he
keeps wanting to call a girl by his last name;
[31] is like war; simple
to begin but the devil to stop;
[32] is like the action
similar to an hourglass:
the heart fills as the brain empties;
[33] something which creates
a religion that worships
two fallible gods;
[34] a word used to label
the sexual excitement of the
young, the habituation of the middle aged, and the
mutual dependence of the old;
[35] a situation; when
it is true, does not mean gazing
into each other's eyes, but looking outward together
in the same direction as life beckons;
[36] something which combines
the two greatest powers on
earth; war and peace;
[37] the balm that heals
the wounds that words make.
[38] what we have in common
with the residents
of all third-world countries;
\\\//
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Subj: What
The World Needs Now (S110)
From: smiles on 99-02-26
More Hugs.
Hugs are the heart's way of smiling and saying
thanks, come closer, give more love.
More smiles. More dreams.
More kisses on steam-filled windows.
More stars in heaven, more lovers on earth.
More midnight dreams.
More dreamers to believe in, more believers.
More magical stories.
More heartstrings to pull.
More black-and-white pictures. More color.
More swing sets under rainbows. More prayer.
More dogs to pet, and cats to run after.
More eyes filled with joyous tears. More collages.
More finger painting.
More flowers.
More mushy love notes. More animal-shaped clouds.
More waterfalls. More space to spin.
More songs to sing.
More freedom to be you.
More girls to dance on daddy's toes.
More Merry-go-rounds. More lives filled with love.
More faith in people. More conversations over
coffee.
More laughter.
--- Author Unknown
Editor's Note: I feel better.
Reading this makes me think
of the Sound of Music... Now
playing in my crazy head
'These Are A Few of my Favorite
Things'
Raindrops
On Roses And Whiskers On Kittens
Bright Copper Kettles
And Warm Woolen Mittens
Bright Paper
Packages Tied Up With Strings
These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things
When The Dog Bites,
When The Bee Stings
When I'm Feeling Sad
I Simply Remember My Favorite Things
..........And Then I Don't Feel So Bad!
\\\//
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Subj: 'I Love
You' In Many Languages (S183, S591c)
From: RFSlick on 99-02-14 and 3/31/2003
and
From: darrellvip on 5/12/2008
English.......... I Love
You
Spanish.......... Te Amo
French........... Je T'aime
German........... Ich
Liebe Dich
Japanese......... Ai Shite
Imasu
Italian.......... Ti Amo
Chinese.......... Wo Ai
Ni
Swedish.......... Jag
Alskar Dig
Eskimo........... Nagligivaget
Greek............ S'Agapo
Hawaiian......... Aloha
Wau la Oe
Irish............ Thaim
In Grabh Leat
Hebrew........... Ani
Ohev Otakh
Russian.......... Ya Lyublyu
Tyebya
Albanian......... Une
Te Dua
Finnish.......... Mina
Rakkastan Sinua
Turkish.......... Seni
Seviyorum
Hungarian........ Se Ret
Lay
Persian.......... Du Stet
Daram
Maltese.......... Jien
Inhobbok
Catalan.......... Testimo
Molt
Redneck ......... Nice Boobs
\\\//
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Subj: Love
Vers. 2
love love l
ove love lo
ve love love love
love love love lov
e love love love love l ove love love love
love
love love love love love love love love love love
love love love love love l ove love love love love lov
e love love love love love love love love love love love
love love love love love love love love love love love
love love love love love love love love love love love
love love love love love love love love love love lov
e love love love love love love love love love lov
e love love love love love love love love love
love love love love love love love love l
ove love love love love love love love
love love love love love love lov
e love love love love love lov
e love love love love love
love love love love lo
ve love love love lo
ve love love love
love love love
love love
love lo
ve
Send this to 5 people or your
heart will be broken in the
next 24 hours. This has
been proven to work. It has
traveled around the world 50
times in the past 2 weeks,
and over 300 couples have broken
up. So, if you have
ever wanted to fall in love,
or if you want to keep
whatever you have now going,
all I gotta say is get to
sendin'...
if you love something set it
free
if it comes back to you it
is yours
if it doesn't then it was never
meant to be.
Around The Corner: By Henson Towne
Around the corner I have a friend,
In this great city that has no end,
Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,
And before I know it, a year is gone.
And I never see my old friend's face,
For life is a swift and terrible race,
He knows I like him just as well,
As in the days when I rang his bell.
And he rang mine.
If, we were younger then,
And now we are busy, tired men.
Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.
"Tommorow" I say "I will call on Jim."
"Just to show that I'm thinking of him."
But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And distance between us grows and grows.
Around the corner! - yet miles away,
"Here's a telegram sir."
"Jim died today."
And that's what we get and deserve in the end.
Around the corner, a vanished friend.
Remember to always say what you
mean. If you love someone,
tell them. Don't be afraid
to express yourself. Reach out
and tell someone what they mean
to you. Because when you
decide that it is the right
time, it might be too late.
Seize the day. Never have
regrets. And most importantly,
stay close to your friends and
family, for they have helped
make you the person that you
are today.
Pass this along to your friends.
It could make a difference.
The difference between doing
all that you can or having
regrets which may stay with
you forever.
.aA
,d88"
,8888"
___ ___
.d888P"
,88888.
a88888b
,888"
,88" '88.
88" "8b
a88P Friendship is
88"_ '8b
88' 8I
d88P never an accident.
'88"
8b.8' ,8I
d88" It is always the
]888' d8'
d88" result of high
)88( .8P
d88" intentions, sincere
d8[ d8'
d88" effort, intelligent
,8P' 88
d88" direction and skillful
d8" ]8[
d88" execution. It repres-
,8P ]8( ,d88"
ents the wise choise
88' 888, ,gm88"
of many alternatives.
d8P '888888"
And remember..... Keep
Smiling coz..... "Of All Things
You Wear, Your Smile Is Most
Important."
Take Care *hugs*
\\\//
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Subj: Molly
And Jumper And Mambo
From: Amy's Humor Archive on 06/27/97
A Short Love Story by Garrett Kaminaga
Jumper had known Molly Jensen
since the moist-eyed days of
early youth. Charlie Rickford
had teased Jumper about
hanging out with girls -- until
Molly beat him up and made
him cry in front of Arthur Jones,
Jonathan Loo and even
Quentin Clarke. And this
was in _the second grade_, where
crying meant the end of hanging
out, of chasing each other
at near light-speed on bicycles,
of endless adventures in
the any world of the fantastic
playground. It was, in the
second grade, like another fall
of man. but Charlie was
reunited with the gang the next
day, his . . . unmanly
tears forgotten in the furious
pace of a seven year-old's
life.
Jumper liked Molly because she
never asked him to marry
her, never wanted to play house,
was interested more in
transformers than in the fake
Barbie dolls that you could
cut the hair off of and it would
never grow back. Not that
Jumper pretended or even thought
that girls were yucky; he
liked them on the whole.
But they were so much less real
than Molly was. Jumper
still got frightened at the movies,
went swimming and played get-dirty-get-scraped
tag with the
guys, but he reserved his most
fantastic adventures for
playing out with Molly.
The any-world of Charlie and Arthur
and Jonathan always had the
same machine-gun fights (even
when they played knights and
dragons), the same gory deaths,
the same _everything_. Molly
and Jumper created worlds
better than anything on TV,
filled with the black-and-white
hopes and fears of second grade,
because Jumper and Molly
were best friends.
When they reached intermediate
school, and Charlie and
Arthur all eagerly pretended
to be grossed-out by spin the
bottle and the other I'm-curious
games of adolescence,
Molly and Jumper, impossibly,
grew closer together. One
day at the park Molly wanted
to play on the swings instead
of play foursquare, and she
began to talk about the grayer
hopes and fears of thirteen-ness.
And Jumper, amazingly,
found that he really didn't
mind.
So, they learned from each other
-- Molly talked about
training bras, about stupid
slumber parties, about the
unbelievable pain of braces.
Jumper talked about his
middle name (Xavier), about
not making the basketball team
cut, about the requisite machismo
of being a teenage guy.
And they both got to sleep a
little easier because of it.
They stayed friends even through
the intense world of high
school. Through Nazi history
teachers who pulled pop
quizzes and looked at someone
else but asked you a question,
through class struggles that
made Sally Hart laugh at Jumper
when he asked her out, through
Valentine's dances and Home-
coming games, club fundraisers
and the slow invasion of the
pressures of the outside world.
Not that they were boy-
friend and girlfriend.
You never saw Molly and Jumper
talking and crying or stuck
together like Siamese twins.
They didn't even go to prom
together -- Jumper went with
Sally, who was much nicer after
she stopped hanging out
with the soc crowd, and Molly
went with Quentin. They
exchanged pictures and signed
yearbooks and talked just
like regular friends, right
up through graduation. But
only Molly knew that Jumper
came close to flunking out of
school, and only Jumper knew
that Molly had slammed the
door in Quentin's face after
prom (although Quentin told
it differently).
Then, while waiting in the registration
line at State,
wedged between his roommate
(who claimed to be an
anarchist, making Jumper go
look the word up) and a huge
woman who wore a hideous shade
of green and smelled of
anchovies, Jumper realized that
he loved Molly. All it
took was his roommate telling
him, as Molly walked into the
gym, that his girlfriend had
arrived. Jumper started with
the automatic response of "She's
not my girlfriend," since
he had been asked that too many
times to count in high
school, when all the memories
of their time together
pressured it back down his throat
and lodged it painfully
in his chest. For the
entire semester, when Jumper was at
Molly's dorm doing frosh English
or just talking, his
mind was racing through thousands
of scenarios of
confessing his love.
"Molly, I love you" wasn't quite
right, and the moonlit
walk through Bishop Yard was
a little too saccharin (and
dangerous). When they
fell to talking as they had been so
used to, he lied when she asked
him about his love life.
Jumper knew that if she didn't
love him (how could she, so
beautiful, so warm, love me?
he thought) then that put
their friendship in a precarious,
awkward position. Their
12-year friendship was too much
to gamble. But then, the
pain that had stayed from his
realization in the regis-
tration line (Jumper had thought
that it was indigestion
at first) was eating him up
from inside and burning through
his skin every second of the
day.
Then, one night Molly told him
that she had a crush on Adam
Rawlings, the athletic water
polo player down the hall.
Jumper died inside. Dammit!
Jumper only wanted Molly to
be happy, but that meant her
having Adam, and not having
him. But Jumper, who truly
loved Molly, decided to get him
for her. Jumper and Adam
knew each other from weekly
physics problem sets, and, through
cajoling and begging and
innuendo, Jumper got Adam to
ask her out. Then, as Jumper
was about to go drink himself
into a stupor over what he
had done, Molly asked him to
come over.
"Adam asked me out."
Jumper acted surprised. "Great! What're you going to do?"
"I'm not going. I told him no."
Jumper said nothing. "Jumper,
I've known you since second
grade." Her words came
slowly, choked. "I ... ever since
high school ... "
And Jumper knew that she loved
him too. He said nothing.
He grabbed her hand and ran
outside, into the parking lot,
where the cold bit at the skin,
but Jumper and Molly didn't
mind because they were warmed
inside and the moon was
coming out from behind the clouds
and someone, somewhere,
was playing mambo music a little
too loudly, and they did
not have to say anything to
each other because saying any-
thing would have been anticlimactic,
and he slipped his
arms around her and amazed,
felt her against him, and he
lowered his lips to hers, happy
beyond all joys.
Then a bus ran them both over and smashed them to bits.
\\\//
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========================oOO==(_)==OOo=======================Top
Subj: Love,
Lust And Marriage
From: humorlist-digest V1 #211 on 97-09-29
(Also see 'How
Do You Know If Love,Lust,OrMarried? in Marriage2)
A Guide to Help You Determine
Whether You are In Love,
In Lust, or Married
LOVE - when your eyes meet across
a crowded room.
LUST - when your tongues meet
across a crowded room.
MARRIAGE - when your belt won't
meet around your waist,
and you don't care.
LOVE - when intercourse is called
making love.
LUST - all other times.
MARRIAGE - what's intercourse?
LOVE - when you share everything
you own.
LUST - when you think twice
about giving
your partner bus money.
MARRIAGE - when the bank owns
everything.
LOVE - when it doesn't matter
if you don't climax.
LUST - when the relationship
is over if you don't climax.
MARRIAGE - what's a climax?
LOVE - when you phone each other
just to say "I love you".
LUST - when you phone each other
just to organize sex.
MARRIAGE - when you phone each
other to find out
what time your kid's game starts.
LOVE - when you write poems about
your partner.
LUST - when all you write is
your partner's phone number.
MARRIAGE - when all you write
is checks.
LOVE - when you show concern
for your true love's feelings.
LUST - when you show concern
for whether your partner
is cute and sexy.
MARRIAGE - when your only concern
is what's on television.
And where is the remote?
LOVE - when your farewell is,
"I love you, darling."
LUST - when your farewell is,
"Same time next week?"
MARRIAGE - when your farewell
is, "Don't forget
to pick up the kids on the way home."
LOVE - when you are proud to
be seen in
public with your partner.
LUST - when you only see each
other in the bedroom.
MARRIAGE - when you never see
each other awake.
LOVE - when your heart flutters
every time you see them.
LUST - when your groin twitches
every time you see them.
MARRIAGE - when your wallet
empties every time
you see them.
LOVE - when nobody else matters.
LUST - when nobody else knows.
MARRIAGE - when everybody else
matters and
you don't care who knows.
LOVE - when all the songs on
the radio
describe exactly how you feel.
LUST - when all the songs on
the radio
are just the same old mushy stuff.
MARRIAGE - when you never have
time to listen to music.
LOVE - when breaking up is something
you
try not to think about.
LUST - when staying together
is something
you try not to think about.
MARRIAGE - when wondering how
you will get through the day
is something you try not to think about.
LOVE - when you're interested
in everything
your
partner does.
LUST - when you're only interested
in one thing.
MARRIAGE - when you're not interested
in what your partner
does. And where IS that darned remote?
\\\//
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========================oOO==(_)==OOo=======================
Subj: Short
Love Comments
Top
Subj: Saying
'I Love You' (S433b)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 5/19/2005
Thirteen percent of the women
interviewed by "Playgirl
Magazine" said, "I love you"
to get a man to have sex
with them.
The rest of the women surveyed,
said they say it to scare
a man and get rid of him!
Top
Subj: You
Can Say It (S404b)
From: igiggle 9/30/2004
You can say it with flowers,
You can say it with candy,
You can say it with jewelry
or drink.
You can say it with candles
and dinner with brandy,
But be sure you don't say it
with ink.
Top
Subj: A Good
Relationship Checklist (S397)
From: LABLaughsClean on 9/3/2004
At: http://www.ezines4all.com/ct200407/071.htm
 |
Top
Subj: Naughty
Love Poem (S318)
From: LABLaughs.com on 3/2/2003
Love is a sensation,
caused by a temptation,
to feel penetration.
A guy sticks his location,
in a girl's destination,
to increase the population,
for the next generation.
Did you get my explanation,
or do you need a demonstration?
\
This stimulates 29 muscles and
chemicals causing
relaxation. Women seem
to like it light and frequent,
men like it more strenuous.
A kiss
Facts about Americans. Did you
know that...
2 out of 5 have married their
first love.
From LAWS file.
In Logan County, Colorado it
is illegal for a man to kiss
a woman while she is asleep....
In Halethrope (Baltimore), it
is illegal to kiss for more
than one second...
In Tulsa, Oklahoma kisses lasing
more than three minutes
are forbidden...
From: RFSlick on 6/27/99 (S126b)
Love is like a roller coaster:
when it's good you don't want
to get off,
and when it isn't... you can't
wait to throw up.
From: dogbyte on 9/29/2001 (S244)
"Love" is staying up all
night with a sick child,
or with a healthy adult!
From: dogbyte on 10/30/2001 (S248)
Love isn't only blind,..
it's also deaf and dumb!
From: LABLaughs.com on 2/1/2002 (S261)
Ever has it been that love knows
not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
-- Kahlil Gibran.
From: LABLaughs.com on 2/26/2002 (S265c)
Life without love is like a
tree without blossoms or fruit.
-- Kahlil Gibran, 'The
Vision'
From: Joke-Of-The-Day on 2/13/2002
(S263)
"If love is the answer, could
you rephrase the question?"
-- Lilly Tomlin.
From: LABLaughs.com on 2/24/2002 (S265c)
A broken hand works, but not
a broken heart.
-- Persian Proverb
From: LABLaughs.com on 2/25/2002 (S265c)
The supreme happiness in life
is the conviction that we
are loved -- loved for ourselves,
or rather, loved in
spite of ourselves. --
Victor Hugo
From: LABLaughs.com on 4/16/2002 (S272c)
"Love is friendship set on fire."
-- Jeremy Taylor
From: LABLaughs.com on 5/3/2002 (S274c)
It is better to be feared than
loved, if you cannot be both.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli
(1469-1527), "The Prince"
From: LABLaughs.com on 5/29/2002 (S278b)
Love is true!
Facts are the enemy of truth.
-- Don Quixote - "Man
of La Mancha"
From: Joke-Of-The-Day on 8/19/2002
(S290b)
A girl must marry for love and
keep on marrying until
she finds it. -- Zsa Zsa
Gabor
From: LABLaughs.com on 12/17/2002 (S308b)
True, we love life, not because
we are used to living, but
because we are used to loving.
There is always some madness
in love, but there is also always
some reason in madness
-- Friedrich Nietzsche
From: LABLaughs.com on 3/21/2003 (S321b)
Love is the wisdom of the fool
and the folly of the wise.
-- Samuel Jackson
From: igiggle on 4/22/03 (S325b)
Happiness isn't something you
experience. It's something
you remember. -- Oscar
Levant
From: LABLaughsClean on 8/6/2004 (S393b)
Love is grand, divorce is a
hundred grand
From: LABLaughsClean on 10/28/2004
(S406b - thoughts-learned-supp)
"Life's greatest happiness is
to be convinced we are loved."
-- Victor Hugo
(1802 - 1885), Les Miserables, 1862
From: LABLaughsClean on 10/28/2004
(S406b)
Two antennas meet on a roof,
fall in love and get married.
The ceremony wasn't much, but
the reception was excellent.
From: LABLaughsClean on 11/18/2004
(S409b)
"Nothing takes the taste out
of peanut butter quite
like unrequited love." Charles
M. Schulz (1922 - 2000),
Charlie Brown in "Peanuts"
From: LABLaughsClean on 11/19/2004
(S409b)
"To love and be loved is to
feel the sun from both sides."
David Viscott, O Magazine,
February 2004
From: igiggle on 1/13/2005
I'm not rushing into being in
love. I'm finding
fourth grade hard enough.
-- Regina, age ten
From: igiggle@aol.com on 1/16/2006
(S469b)
Life is just one foolish thing
after another, and
love is just two foolish things
after each other.
From: igiggle on 1/28/2006 (S472b)
It is better to love two too
many than one too few.
-- Sir John Harington
\\\//
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