love

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Subj: Love
(Includes 53 jokes and articles, 21 1046,10,cf,wYT2c4a5a,6)

Click "Here" for Love-Supp

..............................Saying 'I Love You' (S433b)
..............................You Can Say It - Poem (S404b)
..............................A Good Relationship Checklist - GIF (S397)
..............................Naughty Love Poem (S318)

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Subj:     Mending A Broken Hearts (S946)
          From: Maxim G. Maw on Facebook
Source: (Removed from facebook.com/photo.php)
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..............Click 'HERE' to see the full drawing.
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Subj:     Tumbleweed Tango (S1005)
          From: Claudia Rook on 4/14/2016
Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/rlwfd1ZaDJ4

The best way for a pair of balloon animals to survive in a
cactus-filled desert is working together. Click 'HERE' to
see this exciting, love story.

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Subj: Love (S119)
From: RFSlick on 5/10/99

I don't know where this came from, but it is special ______

The beginning of love, is to let those we love be perfectly
themselves and not twist them with our own image - otherwise,
we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them.

The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of every-
thing... they just make the most out of everything that comes
their way.

The best kind of friend is the one you can sit on a porch
with, never saying a word and then walk away, feeling like
that was the best conversation you've had.

Don't go for looks - it can deceive.
Don't go for money - even wealth fades away.
Go for someone who makes you smile, because only a smile
makes a dark day seem bright.

Happiness lies for those who cry, those who hurt, those who
have searched and those who have tried. For only they can
appreciate the importance of the people who have touched
their lives.

Love is when you take away the feeling, the passion and the
romance... and you find out you still care for that person.

Love comes to those who still hope even though they've been
disappointed, those who still believe, even though they have
been betrayed and those who still love even though they've
been hurt before.

Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people, before
meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the
right person, we should know how to be grateful for that
gift.

It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return. But,
what is the most painful is to love someone and never find
the courage to let the person know how you feel.

The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten
past... you can't go on in life until you let go of your
past failures and heartaches.

Giving someone all your love is never an assurance that
they'll love you back! Don't expect love in return, just
wait for it to grow in their hearts. But, if it doesn't,
be content it grew in yours.

There are things that you would love to hear, but you never
hear it from the person you want to. Don't be deaf to hear
it from the person who says it with their heart.

When you were born, you were crying and everyone around you
was smiling. Live you life so that when you die, you are
smiling and everyone around you is crying.

When one door of happiness closes, another opens. But often
we look so long at the closed door, that we don't see the
one which has just been opened for us.

Always put yourself in the other's shoes. If you feel that
it hurts you, it probably hurts the other person, too.

A sad thing about life is when you meet someone who means a
lot to you... only to find out in the end, that it was never
meant to be and you just have to let go.

It takes a minute to have a crush on someone... an hour to
like someone... a day to love someone... but it takes a
lifetime to forget someone.

Love starts with a smile, develops with a kiss and ends
with a tear.

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Subj:     Seahorse Courtship Dance (S1009)
          From: Diane J Swinehart
          on Facebook on 4/20/2016
Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/zvGRVWGpdNg

At full moon, sea horses greet each other before they
start their courtship dance. You can see this exhibit
at the Monterey Bay Aquarium, California. Click 'HERE'
to see this beautiful dance.

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Subj: Forbidden Love (S406)
From: DoctorDebt on 10/29/2004
Source: http://www.octanecreative.com/Parodyville/as_seen/caught.jpg

They were alone in the house. It was a cold, dark, stormy night.
The storm had come up quickly and each time the thunder boomed,
he watched her jump. She looked across the room and admired
his strong appearance. She wished that he would take her in
his arms, comfort her, protect her from the storm. She wanted
that...

Then the power went out. She screamed. He raced to the sofa
where she was cowering. He did not hesitate to pull her into
his arms. He knew this was a forbidden union and expected her
to pull back. He was surprised when she didn't resist, but
instead clung to him. The storm raged on, as did their growing
passion, and there came a moment when each knew that they had
to be together. They knew it was wrong. Their families would
not understand. But they were so consumed in their passion
they didn't hear the door or the click of the light switch.
The power was back on .....click

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Subj: Forbidden Love II (S436d)
From: LABLaughsRiddles20050602 on 6/2/2005
Source: http://www.flashfunpages.com/jody2.htm

This video is the same as Forbidden Love listed below.
You can view by clicking 'HERE'.

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Subj:     Two Brooms In Love (S129b, S453b)
          From: smiles on 6/7/99
      and From: darrell94590 on 9/21/2005

Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they
got to know each other so well, they decided to get married.

One broom was, of course, the bride broom, the other the
groom broom. The bride broom looked very beautiful in her
white dress. The groom broom was handsome and suave in his
tuxedo. The wedding was lovely.

After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride-broom
leaned over and said to the groom-broom, "I think I am going
to have a little whisk broom!!!"

"IMPOSSIBLE !!" said the groom broom.

Are you ready for this?

Brace yourself; this is going to hurt.

Keep going on down.

"WE HAVEN'T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!"

Oh for goodness sake... laugh, or at least groan. Life's too
short not to enjoy... even these silly little cute..... and
clean jokes

Sounds to me like she's been "sweeping" around!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Subj:     The Wishgranter Short Film (S1025)
          Made by Ringling College
          From: Olga Petrova on 9/4/2016
Source: http://www.youtube.com/embed/zON0wDD7VJY
(See "The Wishing Well" in Elderly1-Supp)

Click 'HERE' to see this CGI 3D animated short film.

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Subj: True Love (S263c)
From: Joke-Of-The-Day on 2/13/2002

Kristy,

Below is a poem which expresses the love
that I feel for you everyday of my life!!

Your sweet and gentle kiss,
Makes life an eternal bliss.
Your beautiful smile makes everyday worthwhile.
As I pass each day,
It becomes an impossible task to keep my feelings at bay.
All the things that I want to say,
And all of the emotions that I want to portray.
To express them all there is just no possible way,
This puts me in a state of total disarray.
Amidst the wondering,
Through all of loves thundering.
I know, I will always know,
And that we will forever be,
Because I know that you are the one for me!

Kristy I love you so much with all my heart.
Happy Valentine's day!!! Will you marry me?!?
Love Always,
Joe

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Subj: Taking The Plunge (S1046d)
From: Olga Petrova on 1/21/2017
Source: https://www.youtube.
.........com/embed/mtIUZBV9Ka4

Click 'HERE' to see a young man's ideal marriage proposal
put in jeopardy when he drops the ring.

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Subj: Wealth, Success, And Love (S262c)
From: gheckman on 2/6/2002

A woman came out of her house and saw 3 old men with long
white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not
recognize them. She said "I don't think I know you, but
you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat."

"Is the man of the house home?", they asked.

"No", she replied. "He's out."

"Then we cannot come in", they replied.

In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what
had happened. "Go tell them I am home and invite them in!"
The woman went out and invited the men in.

"We do not go into a House together," they replied.

"Why is that?" she asked.

One of the old men explained: "His name is Wealth," he said
pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another
one, "He is Success, and I am Love." Then he added, "Now go
in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in
your home."

The woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her
husband was overjoyed. "How nice!!", he said. "Since that
is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill
our home with wealth!"

His wife disagreed. "My dear, why don't we invite Success?"

Their daughter-in-law was listening from the other corner
of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion: "Would
it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be
filled with love!"

"Let us heed our daughter-in-law's advice," said the husband
to his wife. "Go out and invite Love to be our guest."

The woman went out and asked the 3 old men, "Which one of
you is Love? Please come in and be our guest." Love got up
and started walking toward the house. The other 2 also got
up and followed him. Surprised, the lady asked Wealth and
Success: "I only invited Love, Why are you coming in?"

The old men replied together: "If you had invited Wealth or
Success, the other two of us would've stayed out, but since
you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with him. Wherever
there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success!"

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Subj:     Pickles Comic Strip (S788)
          By Brian Crane on 2/14/2012
Source: http://www.gocomics.com/pickles/2012/02/14
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Subj:     The Green Dog Teaches About Love (S393)
          From: Imogenelumen on 8/5/2004

Read Each One Carefully and Think About It a Second or Two

1. I love you not because of who you are,
but because of who I am when I am with you..

2. No man or woman is worth your tears,
and the one who is, won't make you cry.

3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want
them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand
and touches your heart.

5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting
right beside them knowing you can't have them.

6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know
who is falling in love with your smile.

7. To the world you may be one person,
but to one person you may be the world.

8. Don't waste your time on a man/woman,
who isn't willing to waste their time on you.

9. Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before
meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet
the person, we will know how to be grateful.

10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened.

11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so
what you have to do is keep on trusting and just be
more careful about who you trust next time around.

12. Make yourself a better person and know who you are
before you try and know someone else and expect them
to know you.

13. Don't try so hard, the best things come
when you least expect them to.

REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON.

True friends: How many people actually have 8 true friends?
Hardly anyone I know ! But some of us have all right friends
and good friends!!!

You have been Tagged by the Green Dog!

,-._,-.

\/)"(\/

(_o_)

ruff!!!!!!

You will Have Good Luck For Two Years if you send this to 8
people or more and if this is sent back to you then you are
a true friend......

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Subj: Have You Ever (S140)
From: RFSlick on 10/06/1999

     Have you ever noticed that the worst way to miss
     someone is when they are right beside you and yet you
     can never have them...when the moment you can't feel
     them under your fingertips you miss them?

     Have you ever wondered which hurts the most; saying
     something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing
     and wishing you had?

     I guess the most important things are the hardest
     things to say. They are the things you get ashamed of
     because words diminsh them; words shrink things that
     seemed timeless when they were in your head...to no
     more than living size when they are brought out....

     Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you
     do, they might break your heart...but if you don't,
     you might break theirs.

     Have you ever decided not to become a couple because
     you were so afraid of losing what you already had with
     that person? Your heart decides who it likes and who
     it doesn't. You can't tell your heart what to do. It
     does it on its own - when you least suspect it, or
     even when you don't want it to.

     Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything
     you had, but that other person was too afraid to let
     you? Too many of us stay closed up because we are too
     afraid to care too much...for fear that the other
     person does not care as much, or at all.

     Have you ever loved someone and they had absolutely no
     idea whatsoever? Or fell for your best-friend in the
     entire world, and then sat around and watched them
     fall for someone else?

     Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because
     your fear of rejection was too hard to handle? We
     tell lies when we are afraid....afraid of what we
     don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid
     of what will be found out about us. But everytime we
     tell a lie....the thing we fear grows stronger. Life
     is all about risks and it requires you to jump. Don't
     be a person who has to look back and wonder what they
     would have, or could have had.

     No one waits forever., so
     send this to someone or some people
     you care the most about .
     show them you care .
     let them now
     how you feel.

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Subj:     Agnes Comic Strip (S788)
          by Tony Cochran on 2/14/2012
Source: http://www.gocomics.com/agnes/2012/02/14
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Subj:     LOVE, n. (S115)
          From: smiles on 4/11/99

Speaking of love -- that wondrous emotion -- here are
what 38 people have said about it:

[1] man's grand delusion that one woman differs from
       another;
[2] a sea of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses;
[3] what Plato described as "a grave mental disease";
[4] something they say is blind; it's marriage
       which is the real eye opener;
[5] that emotion which is not true until returned;
[6] that delightful interval between meeting a beautiful
       girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock
       {John Barrymore};
[7] is like measles; much worse when it comes late in
       life;
[8] the most slippery word in the human language;
       used by knaves to seduce, by fools for comfort,
       and by most men to placate the female of the
       species;
[9] the only fire for which there is no insurance;
[10] an emotion, even if unreturned, has its rainbow;
[11] the crocodile in the river of desire {Bhartrihari c.
       625};
[12] the only game that two can play and both win;
[13] the last and most serious of the childhood diseases;
[14] what makes marriage possible; habit makes it last;
[15] is the wisdom of the fool and the folly of the wise;
[16] a disease like measles, we all have to go through
       it;
[17] a temporary insanity curable by marriage or the
       removing of the patient from the influences under
       which he or she incurred the disorder;
[18] the only game that is never called on account of
       darkness;
[19] the tie that blinds;
[20] consists of happiness, given back and forth;
[21] the only thing that has changed over the millions
       of years of playing this game is that trumps have
       changed from clubs to diamonds;
[22] that which makes the world revolve;
[23] is really just being stupid together;
[24] a situation which happens when you think almost
       as much of another as you do of yourself;
[26] is a fan club with only two members;
[27] the only virtue that can be divided endlessly
       and still not be diminished;
[28] the triumph of imagination over intelligence;
[29] the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion;
[30] a strange feeling that comes over a man; when he
       keeps wanting to call a girl by his last name;
[31] is like war; simple to begin but the devil to stop;
[32] is like the action similar to an hourglass:
       the heart fills as the brain empties;
[33] something which creates a religion that worships
       two fallible gods;
[34] a word used to label the sexual excitement of the
       young, the habituation of the middle aged, and the
       mutual dependence of the old;
[35] a situation; when it is true, does not mean gazing
       into each other's eyes, but looking outward together
       in the same direction as life beckons;
[36] something which combines the two greatest powers on
       earth; war and peace;
[37] the balm that heals the wounds that words make.
[38] what we have in common with the residents
       of all third-world countries;

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Subj:     'I Love You' In Many Languages (S183, S591c)
          From: RFSlick on 99-02-14 and 3/31/2003
      and From: darrellvip on 5/12/2008

English.......... I Love You
Spanish.......... Te Amo
French........... Je T'aime
German........... Ich Liebe Dich
Japanese......... Ai Shite Imasu
Italian.......... Ti Amo
Chinese.......... Wo Ai Ni
Swedish.......... Jag Alskar Dig
Eskimo........... Nagligivaget
Greek............ S'Agapo
Hawaiian......... Aloha Wau la Oe
Irish............ Thaim In Grabh Leat
Hebrew........... Ani Ohev Otakh
Russian.......... Ya Lyublyu Tyebya
Albanian......... Une Te Dua
Finnish.......... Mina Rakkastan Sinua
Turkish.......... Seni Seviyorum
Hungarian........ Se Ret Lay
Persian.......... Du Stet Daram
Maltese.......... Jien Inhobbok
Catalan.......... Testimo Molt

Redneck ......... Nice Boobs

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Subj: Love, Lust And Marriage
From: humorlist-digest V1 #211 on 97-09-29

(Also see 'How Do You Know If Love,Lust,OrMarried? in Marriage2)

A Guide to Help You Determine Whether You are In Love,
In Lust, or Married

LOVE - when your eyes meet across a crowded room.
LUST - when your tongues meet across a crowded room.
MARRIAGE - when your belt won't meet around your waist,
and you don't care.

LOVE - when intercourse is called making love.
LUST - all other times.
MARRIAGE - what's intercourse?

LOVE - when you share everything you own.
LUST - when you think twice about giving
your partner bus money.
MARRIAGE - when the bank owns everything.

LOVE - when it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
LUST - when the relationship is over if you don't climax.
MARRIAGE - what's a climax?

LOVE - when you phone each other just to say "I love you".
LUST - when you phone each other just to organize sex.
MARRIAGE - when you phone each other to find out
what time your kid's game starts.

LOVE - when you write poems about your partner.
LUST - when all you write is your partner's phone number.
MARRIAGE - when all you write is checks.

LOVE - when you show concern for your true love's feelings.
LUST - when you show concern for whether your partner
is cute and sexy.
MARRIAGE - when your only concern is what's on television.
And where is the remote?

LOVE - when your farewell is, "I love you, darling."
LUST - when your farewell is, "Same time next week?"
MARRIAGE - when your farewell is, "Don't forget
to pick up the kids on the way home."

LOVE - when you are proud to be seen in
public with your partner.
LUST - when you only see each other in the bedroom.
MARRIAGE - when you never see each other awake.

LOVE - when your heart flutters every time you see them.
LUST - when your groin twitches every time you see them.
MARRIAGE - when your wallet empties every time
you see them.

LOVE - when nobody else matters.
LUST - when nobody else knows.
MARRIAGE - when everybody else matters and
you don't care who knows.

LOVE - when all the songs on the radio
describe exactly how you feel.
LUST - when all the songs on the radio
are just the same old mushy stuff.
MARRIAGE - when you never have time to listen to music.

LOVE - when breaking up is something you
       try not to think about.
LUST - when staying together is something
       you try not to think about.
MARRIAGE - when wondering how you will get through the day
       is something you try not to think about.

LOVE - when you're interested in everything
your partner does.
LUST - when you're only interested in one thing.
MARRIAGE - when you're not interested in what your partner
does. And where IS that darned remote?

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Subj:     All You Need T-Shirt (S967)
          From: Teespring.com
Source: http://teespring.com/LoveMathTee
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............Click on the source to buy this T-Shirt.
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Subj:     Short Love Comments

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Subj: Saying 'I Love You' (S433b)
From: LABLaughsAdult on 5/19/2005
Thirteen percent of the women interviewed by "Playgirl
Magazine" said, "I love you" to get a man to have sex
with them.

The rest of the women surveyed, said they say it to scare
a man and get rid of him!

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Subj: You Can Say It (S404b)
From: igiggle 9/30/2004
You can say it with flowers,
You can say it with candy,
You can say it with jewelry or drink.
You can say it with candles and dinner with brandy,
But be sure you don't say it with ink.

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Subj:     A Good Relationship Checklist (S397)
          From: LABLaughsClean on 9/3/2004
Source: (Removed from ezines4all.com)
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Subj:     Naughty Love Poem (S318)
          From: LABLaughs.com on 3/2/2003
Love is a sensation,
caused by a temptation,
to feel penetration.
A guy sticks his location,
in a girl's destination,
to increase the population,
for the next generation.
Did you get my explanation,
or do you need a demonstration?

This stimulates 29 muscles and chemicals causing
relaxation. Women seem to like it light and frequent,
men like it more strenuous. A kiss

Facts about Americans. Did you know that...
2 out of 5 have married their first love.

From LAWS file.

In Logan County, Colorado it is illegal for a man to kiss
a woman while she is asleep....

In Halethrope (Baltimore), it is illegal to kiss for more
than one second...

In Tulsa, Oklahoma kisses lasing more than three minutes
are forbidden...

From: RFSlick on 6/27/99 (S126b)
Love is like a roller coaster:
when it's good you don't want to get off,
and when it isn't... you can't wait to throw up.

From: dogbyte on 9/29/2001 (S244)
"Love" is staying up all
night with a sick child,
or with a healthy adult!

From: dogbyte on 10/30/2001 (S248)
Love isn't only blind,..
it's also deaf and dumb!

From: LABLaughs.com on 2/1/2002 (S261)
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation. -- Kahlil Gibran.

From: LABLaughs.com on 2/26/2002 (S265c)
Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit.
-- Kahlil Gibran, 'The Vision'

From: Joke-Of-The-Day on 2/13/2002 (S263)
"If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?"
-- Lilly Tomlin.

From: LABLaughs.com on 2/24/2002 (S265c)
A broken hand works, but not a broken heart.
-- Persian Proverb

From: LABLaughs.com on 2/25/2002 (S265c)
The supreme happiness in life is the conviction that we
are loved -- loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in
spite of ourselves. -- Victor Hugo

From: LABLaughs.com on 4/16/2002 (S272c)
"Love is friendship set on fire."
-- Jeremy Taylor

From: LABLaughs.com on 5/3/2002 (S274c)
It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.
-- Niccolo Machiavelli (1469-1527), "The Prince"

From: LABLaughs.com on 5/29/2002 (S278b)
Love is true!
Facts are the enemy of truth.
-- Don Quixote - "Man of La Mancha"

From: Joke-Of-The-Day on 8/19/2002 (S290b)
A girl must marry for love and keep on marrying until
she finds it. -- Zsa Zsa Gabor

From: LABLaughs.com on 12/17/2002 (S308b)
True, we love life, not because we are used to living, but
because we are used to loving. There is always some madness
in love, but there is also always some reason in madness
-- Friedrich Nietzsche

From: LABLaughs.com on 3/21/2003 (S321b)
Love is the wisdom of the fool and the folly of the wise.
-- Samuel Jackson

From: igiggle on 4/22/03 (S325b)
Happiness isn't something you experience. It's something
you remember. -- Oscar Levant

From: LABLaughsClean on 8/6/2004 (S393b)
Love is grand, divorce is a hundred grand

From: LABLaughsClean on 10/28/2004 (S406b - thoughts-learned-supp)
"Life's greatest happiness is to be convinced we are loved."
-- Victor Hugo (1802 - 1885), Les Miserables, 1862

From: LABLaughsClean on 10/28/2004 (S406b)
Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married.
The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

From: LABLaughsClean on 11/18/2004 (S409b)
"Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite
like unrequited love." Charles M. Schulz (1922 - 2000),
Charlie Brown in "Peanuts"

From: LABLaughsClean on 11/19/2004 (S409b)
"To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides."
David Viscott, O Magazine, February 2004

From: igiggle on 1/13/2005
I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding
fourth grade hard enough. -- Regina, age ten

From: igiggle@aol.com on 1/16/2006 (S469b)
Life is just one foolish thing after another, and
love is just two foolish things after each other.

From: igiggle on 1/28/2006 (S472b)
It is better to love two too many than one too few.
-- Sir John Harington

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